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Breaking the Silence
Breaking the Silence episodes
- How Can Self Compassion Help Me Break the Shame Cycle? with Anthony Ennis [38]
Combating your inner critic while overcoming pornography can be tough. That’s why Creed and Crishelle talked with Anthony Ennis this week on learning to love yourself so you can feel empowered to make the changes that lead to recovery.
While studying neuroscience at BYU, Anthony worked with Dr. Scott Steffensen researching addiction and mental health problems. He is currently in the process of getting into medical school. The topic of pornography use hits close to home for him and he is looking forward to sharing a principle that has made all the difference for him.
In this episode:
- Self compassion is learning to treat yourself like your own best friend.
- Be emotionally there for yourself so you can see emotional holes you might be trying to fill with pornography.
- Learn to address the emotions you are feeling so you can make good decisions and move forward in recovery.
- Overcoming is not easy; it takes a lot of mental work and practice.
Links:
- The Space Between Self-Esteem and Self Compassion: Kristin Neff at TEDxCentennialParkWomen
- Self Compassion Test by Kristin Neff
- Radical Compassion: Learning to Love Yourself and Your World with the Practice of RAIN by Tara Brach
Show Notes:
- Submit anonymous questions, stories, or comments here.
- Follow us on Facebook and Instagram for more!
- Contact us at [email protected].
- Learn more about our nonprofit at Reach 10.
Disclaimer: The views expressed by guests do not necessarily represent our views. We offer this information in good faith, but we don’t make any representation that what you hear is accurate, reliable, or complete. Reach 10 and the Breaking the Silence podcast are not responsible or liable for your use of any information heard in this podcast.
19 min - How Can I Forgive My Parents for Being Weird About Sex and Pornography? with Vauna Davis [37]
No one is perfect. Not even our parents. And that is a great thing to remember when you evaluate the sex education your parents passed onto you. This week, Creed and Crishelle talk with Vauna Davis about how you can take your experience learning (or not) about sex from your parents and move beyond any embarassment or shame you may have inherited.
In this episode:
- There is no “one size fits all” for sex education.
- Conversations about pornography and sex are awkward for your parents, too.
- Your parents did the best they could, and they care for you.
- Forgiving your parents frees you to let go of the past and create the open, loving relationships you want.
- Sex education empowers and arms children to deal with pornography in a digital age.
Show Notes:
Sexual Wholeness in Marriage: An LDS Perspective on Integrating Sexuality and Spirituality in our Marriages by Dean M. Busby PhD, Jason S. Carroll PhD, Chelom Leavitt
From Honeymoon to Happily Ever After: 23 Keys to Prepare for a Sextraordinary Marriage (Softcover) by Laura M. Brotherson – Get the book for $10 with this discount code: honeymoonprep
A Better Way to Teach Kids About Sex by Laura Padilla-Walker, Dean Busby, and Chelom Leavitt
Life After Lust: Stories & Strategies for Sex & Pornography Addiction Recovery by Forest Benedict
The Waterfall Concept A Blueprint for Addiction Recovery by Roger Stark
Submit anonymous questions, stories, or comments here.
Follow us on Facebook and Instagram for more!
Contact us at [email protected].
Learn more about our nonprofit at Reach 10.
Disclaimer: The views expressed by guests do not necessarily represent our views. We offer this information in good faith, but we don’t make any representation that what you hear is accurate, reliable, or complete. Reach 10 and the Breaking the Silence podcast are not responsible or liable for your use of any information heard in this podcast.
32 min - How Can We Establish Accountability in Our Marriage? with Zachary and Rachel Andrews [37]
Following through on commitments and holding yourself accountable to your partner is an important part of a trusting marriage. This week, Creed and Crishelle continue their conversation with Zachary and Rachel Andrews as they discuss how they make and follow boundaries involving pornography and other topics in their relationship.
In this episode:
- Practicing good habits in all areas of your life can make for a happier marriage and aid in overcoming pornography.
- Establish accountability by creating a plan with your significant other to help make good decisions.
- Trust is a two-way commitment in a relationship.
Show notes:
- Submit anonymous questions, stories, or comments here.
- Follow us on Facebook and Instagram for more!
- Contact us at [email protected].
- Learn more about our nonprofit at Reach 10.
Disclaimer: The views expressed by guests do not necessarily represent our views. We offer this information in good faith, but we don’t make any representation that what you hear is accurate, reliable, or complete. Reach 10 and the Breaking the Silence podcast are not responsible or liable for your use of any information heard in this podcast.
19 min - How Can We Build Trust in a Relationship That Is Affected by Pornography? with Zachary and Rachel Andrews [35]
Trust is essential in a relationship, whether you are first getting to know each other or have committed to be together forever. Creed and Crishelle talk with Zachary and Rachel Andrews about how they continue to work to create an understanding and trusting marriage even through issues with pornography.
In this episode:
- The Andrews talk about their experience working through pornography issues at the beginning of their relationship.
- It’s ok to take time to think about your feelings before you try to resolve a problem.
- Trust in a relationship comes with the ability to be vulnerable about your mistakes and weaknesses.
- Struggling with pornography doesn’t make you a bad person.
- Prayer can bring peace when you are trying to discuss the challenges of pornography with someone you care about.
Show Notes:
- Submit anonymous questions, stories, or comments here.
- Follow us on Facebook and Instagram for more!
- Contact us at [email protected].
- Learn more about our nonprofit at Reach 10.
Disclaimer: The views expressed by guests do not necessarily represent our views. We offer this information in good faith, but we don’t make any representation that what you hear is accurate, reliable, or complete. Reach 10 and the Breaking the Silence podcast are not responsible or liable for your use of any information heard in this podcast.
20 min - When is Someone Overcoming Pornography Ready to Be in a Relationship? with Karen Broadhead [34]
Have you wondered how to approach the subject of pornography at the beginning of a romantic relationship? In part 2 of this conversation, Creed and Crischelle talk with Karen Broadhead about how to know when a person is ready to date when recovering from pornography, and how to relate and heal with them.
In this episode:
- Someone in recovery is able to be vulnerable in a relationship about their pornography use.
- Dating someone who is overcoming pornography requires willingness to understand and not judge.
- Focusing on things you have no control over makes happiness more difficult.
- Questions you can ask to help open up a conversation about where someone is in recovery.
Show notes:
- Like Dragons Did They Fight by Maurice W. Harker
- Armed with Righteousness: Winning Your Battles with Satan by Steven Cramer
- Mothers Who Know website
- Life Changing Services
- Submit anonymous questions, stories, or comments here.
- Follow us on Facebook and Instagram for more!
- Contact us at [email protected].
- Learn more about our nonprofit at Reach 10.
Disclaimer: The views expressed by guests do not necessarily represent our views. We offer this information in good faith, but we don’t make any representation that what you hear is accurate, reliable, or complete. Reach 10 and the Breaking the Silence podcast are not responsible or liable for your use of any information heard in this podcast.
17 min - How to Support Someone Recovering from Pornography with Karen Broadhead [33]
Whether you’re the one supporting someone recovering from a pornography addiction, or you’re receiving support in your own healing, there’s a lot to learn about relationships. Karen Broadhead, the founder of Mothers Who Know, discovered some important lessons as she supported her son in his recovery. Creed and Crishelle talked with her about what she learned as she and her son were searching for answers. Listen in to some great ideas that can help anyone navigate the challenges of relationships and overcoming pornography.
In this episode:
- Karen’s story with her son
- Fear is never helpful when supporting someone caught in pornography.
- You are not your own worst enemy - understanding your identity puts addiction in perspective.
- Only you have the power to choose how to change. Maintaining accountability and responsibility for your actions causes you to be mindful of your situation and make good decisions.
- How to know if someone is making good progress in recovery.
- Three kinds of business in this world: my business, your business, and God's business.
Show notes:
- Like Dragons Did They Fight by Maurice W. Harker
- Armed with Righteousness: Winning Your Battles with Satan by Steven Cramer
- Mothers Who Know website
- Life Changing Services
- Submit anonymous questions, stories, or comments here.
- Follow us on Facebook and Instagram for more!
- Contact us at [email protected].
- Learn more about our nonprofit at Reach 10.
Disclaimer: The views expressed by guests do not necessarily represent our views. We offer this information in good faith, but we don’t make any representation that what you hear is accurate, reliable, or complete. Reach 10 and the Breaking the Silence podcast are not responsible or liable for your use of any information heard in this podcast.
22 min - Change Your Brain’s Reward Patterns with LaMonte Wilcox [32]
Shame, fear, and pornography addiction all create patterns of thought and behavior to meet subconscious needs. But those patterns can get in the way of the life we want. LaMonte Wilcox is a neuro mental health coach who has studied about our brains and how we can interrupt and change those patterns. Creed and Crishelle talk with him about understanding that process better.
In this episode:
- Our brains run on a reward system, and it seeks to meet our needs.
- 95% of our decisions are made subconsciously, and 70% of those decisions don’t lead to things we truly want.
- Thinking thoughts about shame over and over builds a pattern in our brains, similar to the way an addiction looks.
Show Notes:
- Email LaMonte: [email protected]
- LaMonte's website: www.lamontewilcox.com
- LaMonte's YouTube Channel: My YouTube Channel
- LaMonte's Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Fulfill.Life.Yourself
- Submit anonymous questions, stories, or comments here.
- Follow us on Facebook and Instagram for more!
- Contact us at [email protected].
- Learn more about our nonprofit at Reach 10.
Disclaimer: The views expressed by guests do not necessarily represent our views. We offer this information in good faith, but we don’t make any representation that what you hear is accurate, reliable, or complete. Reach 10 and the Breaking the Silence podcast are not responsible or liable for your use of any information heard in this podcast.
17 min - Awakening to the Power of God to Save from Pornography with Maxwell Hill [31]
What happens when you’re doing everything you know how to do to recover from using pornography, but you keep struggling and relapsing? For Maxwell Hill, feeling like he was drowning was the pathway to knowing that only Jesus Christ had the power to help him. Creed and Crishelle talked with him about how that lead to a deeper relationship with God the Father, Jesus Christ and the Holy Ghost.
In this episode
- Maxwell’s experience with pornography as a young teenager and how his bishop and family responded.
- The biggest impact pornography has had is making him feel unworthy and broken.
- When the focus is on punishing behavior, there’s no real repentance.
- The concept of cognitive behavioral therapy – changing beliefs and thoughts that drive behavior.
- Pornography was an awakening to his weaknesses that helped him realize he needs a Savior.
- His daily belief that God the Father, Jesus Christ and the Holy Ghost are united in power and purpose to bring to pass my immortality and eternal life.
Show Notes:
- Submit anonymous questions, stories, or comments here.
- Follow us on Facebook and Instagram for more!
- Contact us at [email protected].
- Learn more about our nonprofit at Reach 10.
33 min - Decide Who You Want to Be - with Marissah Hannig [30]
Sexuality is talked about too much without the respect it deserves and not enough with the respect it deserves. When Marissah Hannig learned for herself what this meant, her desire to consume pornography began to disperse. She decided that she didn’t want to be someone who consumed pornography. Even when she felt that pull to view it, she would I think to herself “That is not who I want to be.” That same thought has helped her make other hard decisions. Listen in as Creed and Crishelle talk about what respect means to her.
Show Notes:
- Submit anonymous questions, stories, or comments here.
- Follow us on Facebook and Instagram for more!
- Contact us at [email protected].
- Learn more about our nonprofit at Reach 10.
17 min - Spirituality and Sexuality? How Singles Can Honor Both - with Dr. Dean Busby [29]
For single members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and other religions, there can be some confusion about how to save sex for marriage and live your religious beliefs while also experiencing the sexual feelings that God gave you. Dr. Dean Busby, a professor at Brigham Young University, shares thoughts on navigating this challenge. You can hold boundaries without punishing yourself for being a sexual being. You can have a healthy sexual vision, accept that part of yourself, and still abstain before marriage. Seeing sexuality as a sacred part of yourself honors both spirituality and sexuality.
Show Notes: Read Sexual Wholeness in Marriage: An LDS Perspective on Integrating Sexuality and Spirituality in our Marriages by Dean M. Busby PhD, Jason S. Carroll PhD, Chelom Leavitt. Find a 12-step recovery support group. Submit anonymous questions, stories, or comments here. Get podcast transcripts and learn more about our nonprofit at Reach 10. Contact us at [email protected]. Support our podcast and help us reach more young people here. Follow us on Facebook and Instagram for more!
22 min
About Breaking the Silence
From the publisher's feed
This podcast and community breaks the silence, shame, and fear that often surrounds sexuality, unwanted pornography use, and betrayal trauma and helps you embrace your God-given sexuality with courage compassion and connection. People just like you share their stories of recovery and forgiveness and experts teach principles, share insights, and provide real tools to help you rebuild trust and develop healthy sexuality. Ask your questions anonymously and expert therapist, Rachel Denton, will answer them and discuss practical tools to help and gain insight as to how ecclesiastical leaders can play an effective and powerful role in your healing. Join Crishelle Simons as she breaks the silence and together we can create a culture of courage, compassion, and connection.
This podcast is brought to you by Reach 10. Reach 10 is a non-profit with a mission to educate and help young adults overcome the effects of pornography and betrayal trauma and create healthy relationships with themselves and others.
Join the community at @breakingthesilence_reach10 or visit reach10.org.
We share these views to open the dialogue and educate on these tough issues and to create a healthier culture of sexuality. The opinions and views shared by the host or guests do not constitute as professional advice or services and do not necessarily reflect the views of Reach 10, and we don't guarantee the accuracy of any statements you hear. Reach 10 is not responsible for your use of information heard in this podcast. We keep learning, and invite you to join us as we build a more open, compassionate, and courageous culture.
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