Bringing Up Boys Summit

In this important conversation, Dr Justin Coulson and Paul DIllon discuss what’s actually happening with our boys around alcohol, drugs, vaping and other substances in the schoolyard. They also share ways to bring up the drug and alcohol conversation with our boys so they can learn to make healthy decisions when they are out in the real world. 

• 00:19 Dr Justin introduces Paul Dillon
• 01:37 Differences in drug use from young men and young women
• 03:17 Alcohol
• 18:23 Drugs
• 27:10 Vaping
• 32:26 Talking to your kids about it
• 40:42 Tobacco
• 44:16 Percentage of young people smoking
• 46:12 Stimulants 
• 48:56 Notes to parents about drugs
• 51:55 Paul’s concluding words

Drug and Alcohol Research and Training Australia (DARTA)

Paul Dillon has been working in the area of drug education for more than 25 years. Through his own business, Drug and Alcohol Research and Training Australia (DARTA) he has been contracted by many organisations to give regular updates on current drug trends. He continues to work with many school communities across the country to ensure that they have access to good quality information and best practice drug education. With a broad knowledge of a range of content areas, Paul regularly appears in the media and is regarded as a key social commentator, with interviews on television programs such as Sunrise, TODAY and The Project.

DARTA

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As parents we have a tendency to only talk about risk and danger when it comes to sex. Instead, if we change this focus to responsibility and joy, our boys will view sex differently, their partners differently, and make safer, healthier, and wiser choices. In this conversation with Dr Justin Coulson and Peggy Orenstein, they discuss where challenging male sexual behaviour come from and how to give your boys a healthier understanding of both the physical and emotional aspects of sexual intercourse.

• 00:19 Dr Justin introduces Peggy Orenstein
• 01:42 Where do challenging sexual behaviours come from?
• 03:50 What is it like for boys growing up?
• 08:57 Why does ‘masculinity’ impact on boys’ sexuality?
• 10:43 The disconnect in boys’ behaviour at home and outside - assault and consent
• 15:21 Expectations put on boys
• 16:46 Vulnerability and ‘The Hook-Up Culture’
• 19:23 Tips for parents for a conversation about ‘good sex’
• 24:06 Pornography
• 26:46 Talking to your kids about Pornography
• 33:37 Consent 
• 38:14 How to teach consent? 
• 44:16 Summary of key points so far from Dr Justin
• 45:50 Gay boys are a model of consent
• 49:04 Central take-home messages
• 51:53 Last message of hope from Peggy

Peggy Orenstein is an internationally-recognized speaker and author of, among others, the New York Times best-sellers Boys & Sex, Girls & Sex,  Cinderella Ate My Daughter and the classic SchoolGirls. A contributing writer for  The New York Times Magazine, Peggy has also written for such publications as  The Los Angeles Times, The Washington Post, New York, The Atlantic and The New Yorker. She has been a featured expert on television and radio programs throughout the world. Her TED Talk, “What Young Women Believe About Their Own Sexual Pleasure,” has been viewed over 5.6 million times.

• Chanel Contos - the consent petition
• Peggy's website
• Resources for positive sexuality
• Talking to younger kids about sex

Boys and Sex | Peggy Orenstein | Available in Australia | Available in America

Girls and Sex | Peggy Orenstein | Available in Australia | Available in America

Cinderella Ate My Daughter | Peggy Orenstein | Available in Australia | Available in America

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Dr Justin discusses how we can raise strong, caring boys in the current climate. He’ll explain why it’s vital that our boys know who they are and that they matter, as well as share practical ways you can teach your son empathy and to respectfully say and hear “no”.

00:19 Dr Justin introduces his topic

02:15 Culture & the messages we send boys

05:57 Dr Justin’s schoolyard anecdote

08:12 The lowest acceptable behaviour 

13:13 'Don't be a simp'

16:42 We have a cultural problem

22:50 You can set the masculinity culture in your family 

25:13 The boy crisis 

26:43 #1 Teach them who they are | Identity

27:48 Example 1 | Dr Justin’s brother

30:49 Example 2 | Saying no to drugs story

34:08 How to teach them who they are 

40:13 #2 Teach them they matter

44:42 #3 Teach them to believe in themselves

48:49 Listener question - split families

50:06 #4 Teach them to say ‘no’ respectfully

52:57 #5 Teach them to hear ‘no’ respectfully

54:45 #6 Teach them empathy

55:13 #7 Teach them about life, the universe… and everything!

56:14 Summary of the summit

Dr Justin Coulson is the co-host and parenting expert on Channel 9's "Parental Guidance", the founder of happyfamiles.com.au, and one of Australia’s most trusted parenting experts.

Over the past decade he has helped innumerable families with his 6 books about raising children, his hundreds of media appearances (including all of Australia’s major news outlets, and even the Washington Post and the New York Times), and two viral videos that have been viewed a combined 80 million times!

Justin earned his PhD in Psychology from the University of Wollongong. He and his wife Kylie have been married since the late 1990’s and are the parents of 6 daughters . 

Do You Know scale by Marshall Duke

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Welcome to the Bringing Up Boys Summit

We're confident that as you participate in this summit, you won’t just find solutions to help your son through friendship breakdowns, the lure of drugs, anxiety and other mental health issues, or even the life-changing process of puberty. You’ll find ways to rekindle the connection you both want… and both need.

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