BS with Bethany Simko

This week we're chatting about the things I've seen in my life that gave me excuses to play small and not go after what I want. I used to have no idea what people meant what they said something about being "afraid of success", but as I look back I get it. It's so easy to use little excuses as a shield and allow people to downplay your dreams. Listen along this week as I break down how to stop being the chill girl when it comes to your future and how to embrace the growing pains.

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Hey lovers! Excited to sit down and chat a little bit about how my event with Equinox + SOMI went and some of my June intentions for this month. I recorded this right before leaving for Utah, and I am now in Utah (yay!) But it took me a sec to be able to edit and upload, so use this as your time to set some mid-month intentions if you haven't already. Use these last 2 weeks to push yourself out of your comfort zone! I'll see ya next week.

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This kind of episode is what puts the BS in Bethany Simko. I truly have no idea what is going on right now, and you're going to come along with me while I figure it out. Right now I am smack in the middle of a burnout and I can't seem to figure out how to stop getting here. I know a lot of us will only talk about our struggles in past tense, and I'm a sucker for wanting to find a hero story in everything. About how "I was so down, but I figured A, B, and C out and now I'm great". Right now, I have no letters of the alphabet figured out.

But, as I go through the episode you can hear the frustration start to melt a bit as I start to remember how much I've already done for myself, how much I adore my current life, and how it's ok to slow down for a sec. I also dive in a bit to the story about my move and how absolutely unglamorous it was, but how proud I was to call it my own.

This is a truly ranty and rambly episode, but I had a lot of fun chatting it out and remembering lessons that I keep learning over and over again. While I'm still unsure of how to completely avoid getting to the point of saying, "I have nothing left to give" , I'm already feeling better and I'm curious to see how I can build a life with a sustainable pace.

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Habit Stacking is such a powerful tool in incorporating your desired lifestyle changes and behaviors into the routine you already have. In this episode we will be taking a look at your current routine and habits, and I'll be sharing examples to help you pinpoint "anchors" in your day to which you can attach your new habit.

One thing I emphasize throughout the episode is that self improvement should not come with a factory installed setting of dread with it. Approaching your new habit in portions that you can realistically continue with, finding ways to make the behavior rewarding, and working it into your current routine with as little friction as possible are the top ways I talk about to get this new habit to stick with you.

I'm not interested in a "30 day self improvement" journey, or becoming "unrecognizable in 6 months". I'm here for in lifelong lifestyle changes that allow you to wake up and feel like you actually have energy and confidence to go through out your day. To be fair, doing these small things over and over (and over) again, will slowly transform so much of your life in the most beautiful way and I hope that in 6 months you do look back and realize how far you've come. But, also remember that 6 months is just 6 months and you still have SO much time to figure things out. There is no timeline, and there is no shame in this, just new ways to pivot.

In this weeks episode we're talking about getting your shit together, one habit and routine at a time. I'm beyond excited for this episode because this system of forming habits and routines has genuinely changed SO much for me. It helped me move across the country, it's given me the tools to create the life I have now and it's shown me that the vision I have for my life is possible when I take manageable steps to build trust with myself.

The reason this gets me so excited is because everything that I've experienced is very much replicable. I'm no unique case and there's no special determination or crazy mental strength required to start the process of creating self esteem, keeping promises to yourself and watching your new habits and lifestyle bloom. The discipline comes with the cake. You're building it as you go and its beautiful to watch.

We're keeping it short and sweet this week, but I hope that you take the time to genuinely think through every step of your ideal morning routine and pick your starting point. So, when all the pieces of the puzzle are in place, you'll be able to look back and celebrate the hell out of yourself for step by step creating your ideal life.

It all starts with keeping a promise to yourself for 1 day. My biggest take away from this episode is that "once is a mistake, twice is a system". Can't wait to see you again next week and talk a bit more about habit stacking! As you set your goals, feel free to DM me and tell me what they are and let me celebrate with you, or help you navigate the changes they bring. Love you!

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Emotions can be down right exhausting, especially when you feel like they're swayed by every little thing. It's totally normal to want to attach your mood to things in your life that you want to work out, but when they inevitably "ebb" (as everything does) it can ruin your whole day, hell even your week.

One of my favorite life lessons I've learned is about the "Ebb and Flow" and how literally everythinggg in life has periods when it Ebbs and everything is going down hill or Flows when it seems like you're on top of the world. Your job, your relationship, your body, your style, your family. All of it is in a constant state of motion and being able to remove yourself from the whirlwind of it all is a breath of fresh air.

On todays episode I talk about examples in my life where I've been so attached to the outcome of a situation that it has had complete control over my emotions. Especially in a world as fast paced as ours, and with so much of life being on social media, it can be all too easy to attach our self worth and our mood to numbers, metrics, situations, and even our own body image.

But things will go well. And then they won't. And you'll be ok through all of it. Can't wait for you to listed to this episode and hopefully pinpoint some spots in your life that will benefit you stepping back as an observer of the "Ebb and Flow" And if you're in an Ebb state right now, rest assured that your Flow is coming.

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TW: ED

The last thing we need right now is another person telling us that this 30 day ab workout will cut your tummy fat or how to build a booty in 3 weeks or that if you don't track your macros that you'll never see progress.

Overhauling your life and trying to fit yourself into intense periods of transition because you feel like your body needs to be different literally never works and 98% of the time leaves you feeling so much worse about yourself.

With "Bikini Season" coming up, it's so easy to talk yourself out of eating or sacrifice your nutrition for a certain look. If you're dreading the warmer months, I feel you. But, your body is an incredible system that does SO much for you and you deserve all the energy in the world.

So, as summer approaches, here are 5 things that I do to help my mindset stay healthy around food:

1. Notice when I'm body checking and redirect my focus to my eyes + say hi to myself as a human instead of an object to be observed. Turning around mirrors for a while is super helpful!

2. Have a "Body Neutral" mindset when I need to- take all labels off including beautiful, because my body is an incredibly sacred instrument, capable of so many things, and I don't want to reduce it to the way it looks.

3. Correct disordered thoughts in the moment instead of letting them sit and deepen neural pathways.

4. Challenge yourself to make grocery shopping fun + find flavorful foods to add into your week that you enjoy to make meals fulfilling in every sense of the word.

5. Remember that food is ENERGY. The difference between how you feel that day or how your time in the gym goes can all come down to how much you've eaten that day (and be careful of over exercising, especially while under eating)

I hope you are able to come away from this episode with love and compassion for yourself, and excitement about the warmer weeks ahead! If you are in a delicate mental state or feel that anything I said in this episode prompts you to make drastic diet changes, eat less, or feel more fear around your body, I encourage you to stop listening and go eat something (or at least go do something that you enjoy to calm your nervous system and remind yourself that you are ok)

As always, this is not medical advice, but just things that have helped me in my recovery! I'm always on your team and I would love to hear about what is helpful for you or other topics you would like to hear about. Love you!

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You've probably seen Sydney Del Rey on your FYP, bringing you the cutest gym and fashion Amazon hauls! She has built such an incredible community through her love of fashion and her vibrant personality. Seriously, she is my inspo for all things pink, patterned, and glamorous (she literally has a pink velvet couch and I will one day steal it from her). Her vibe is as bright and maximalist as her fashion sense, and I can't wait for you to dive into our conversation and hear everything she has to say.

In this episode we get into some new topics that she doesn't often share on her page. We talk about the anxieties of moving, healing your relationship with the gym, the importance of staying authentic online, why she became vegan and so many other incredible things that she had such great insight on.

Near the end, she decided to ask a few questions back to get to know me a bit more as well! It was like one big long facetime call where I got to hear all about how Sydney BSed her way to where she is now (hello, bedroom for a closet!!)

Enjoy this episode and getting to know Sydney a little better. Follow along on her socials @Sydneydelrey on Insta, Tik Tok, and Youtube (and of course Amazon).

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This week has had a lot of unexpected turns and I've learned a lot about prioritizing myself and my energy. I've taken you guys along for the journey that was my relationship with who we refer to as Utah Boy, but long distance was not on our side. We decided to step away from things and I've been having lots of thoughts and emotions since. I'm feeling lucky that right now I'm on a good wave of inspiration, hope, and I can't help but feel this is a new beginning. No matter the outcome, I hope you can join me in remembering that what is meant to be in your path cannot miss you. Good things always come to you.

This episode is a bit more chaotic than usual, I just picked up and started talking as I was driving to the gym. But, there were lots of things on my mind I wanted to say, and I hope that some of them were able to resonate with you!

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TW: Suicide, SA, abuse.

3 years ago, on March 17th, 2020, I was forcefully admitted to a mental hospital. I know the word "forceful" seems harsh but I include it to capture the reality of what happened and the depth of what I felt both then in the moment and presently.

In this episode I recall details of my institutionalization, a bit of background on why I was sent, and some of the things I learned while there. Honestly, I came very close to not releasing this episode. It took a few days to edit because I had to keep taking breaks when it got too uncomfortable to remember. Even filming this was tough, but I felt it was important to get my story out there. My hope in sharing these details is to resonate with or comfort someone who may not know what to do with the negative emotions they still feel after an event.

Although I find it hard to forgive what happened there, I will forever be grateful for the moments of empathy and humanity that I was shown. If you take anything from this episode let it be these two things:

1. Healing is a process and there is beauty in recognizing that you are still angry or hurt, and not to feel ashamed as you navigate figuring out how to let things go.

2. There can never be too much kindness in this world. Taking 5 minutes to listen to someone when they need a moment of calmness can be life changing. Try to be the soft spot, the humanity, or the warmth in someones day.

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