Building a Better Dave

Today I'm talking about my time at the Spark Christian Podcast Conference in Grapevine Texas this week. I got to hear Tara-Leigh Cobble speak twice and WOW what a story.

She (in two years) has 75 million downloads of her Bible Recap podcast. Would I get up the nerve to ask her on my show?

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Mentioned in this episode The Chosen (it's pretty cool!)

So on Tuesday, I had to crawl through the back window of my house after locking myself out of my house - wait for it - twice.

On Friday I had one of my "Sweating buckets, getting dizzy, can't decide if I'm going to have explosive diarrhea, vomit or passout" sessions. This now has fairly nasty stomach pains. I injured my stomach on Tuesday with a nasty scrape. This is Friday.

I wake up a few times during the night. It hurts to move in bed. Each time I wake up, the pain is moving higher up my body. We've gone from belly button, up higher and higher, and now my chest is tight, and I'm having issues taking a deep breath.

The question and conversations that go through your head when you can't decide if you're having a heart attack or not were not what I had expected. One would think if you thought you were having a heart attack you would call 911. Not me. I know how much an ambulance is, and my Dad was thrifty, and apparently so am I.

I am also the son of my Mom who never wanted to be a bother to anyone. She always put others first.

The good news is I was not having a heart attack. So what was it? When I asked the mirror it lied.

I now think it was a delayed reaction to just beating the crap out of my stomach - twice. That caused the tightness in my chest. The hospital show triggered the sweats (and later the intense pain in my stomach would cause sweats). In the end, I'm not sure.

It does make you think when you have to take a breathe and realize that your number might is being called and your time is up. I am not ready or prepared for any of that, and death doesn't care. It's coming if you're ready or not.

Kiss everyone you love to kiss and hug. Let those you appreciate know it. You never know when your time is up.

Today I explain some side effects of 2020.

COVID 19 where 19 stands for how many pounds did you gain?

It turns out 444 lbs is heavy.

I may have more deliveries in the future.

My gut is ruining my aim

I have carried on a Jackson tradition

Sometimes life has to hold a mirror up until you acknowledge it.

While many people may find themselves crying watching This is Us, I thought things had taken a weird turn when I found myself choking back tears when I was watching the Real World Reunion (on the Paramount Network).

When I feel this way, I have a mental picture of one of those Submarine doors that has almost opened and water starts gushing out, and I get there just in time to spin that wheel and lock it up and go back to whatever I was doing...

I decided to try Better Help, and it's not cheap, but if my arm started bleeding for no reason, I'd go get it checked out.

Just writing down why I thought I should talk to someone made me feel better. If you need a journal check out Penzu.com and in this case, I just had to write why I was signing up for this service. Just going through that process made me feel better.

I met with the counselor and after talking she suggested I read The Grief Recovery Handbook, 20th Anniversary Expanded Edition: the Action Program for Moving Beyond Death, Divorce, and Other Losses Including Health, Career, and Faith

I made it through chapter one, but now I feel like a kid who doesn't want to do his homework. I know that doing the work provides much better grades, but still, I made it through the first chapter and stalled. I need to put on my big boy pants and keep going.

We live in a Facebook world where everyone's lives seem so happy and perfect. I'm OK, and I'm working on being better. I thought if I pulled back the curtain to let you see it's OK to reach out when you could use someone to talk to, and that you're not "weird."

I just need to do my homework and reconnect on Better Help

This episode really makes me sound weird. What I'm getting at is how things make you feel.

"I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. - Maya Angelou

My second marriage wasn't always bad. My wife and I had a running gag of dragging a stuffed bear with us to events. It was funny. He was behind the speaker at our marriage.

My ex-wife named him Roy.

I use to give Roy a voice and make him say terribly dark things that make it hilarious coming out of a cuddly bear.

When we divorced, she kept Roy, and I kept another bear that I had purchased to give to her (but later decided not to - mature I know...)

I decided to buy my own Roy. It turns out that was harder to do than originally planned.

How do you make people feel?

If a stuffed toy can bring happiness, can you imagine how you can make a person feel?

One last thing, I know this makes me sound like COVID has cracked my sanity. I'm fine. I know this is weird.

I found myself in my new old house. This was different. I had no speakers, no Internet, and my phone was there, but that wasn't going to work.

I was alone - with just my thoughts.

I wasn't sure what would happen, but sometimes when I'm left alone with just the voice in my head things can go negative.

The house (without the noise to distract me) sent my brain into the archives of thoughts that I had not remembered in decades.

The brain is amazing, and I enjoyed a trip down memory lane.

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Today I share some insights into love and living with people who had disorders.

I currently get annoyed with how cashiers bag things at the store. I end up with twice as many bags as needed. It just seems everywhere I turn, I'm opening a drawer, a pocket, a box, and its all bags.

Love is knowing someone's characteristics that drive you nuts, and accepting them. It's part of what makes them who they are. You can try to change them, but you and I both know that the chances of that succeeding are slim and none.

So you hang in there, and focus on the good things, and accept those things you can't change.

I lost a lot of sleep worrying about talking to my sister. My sister (who I love dearly) has always had my back and has a very unique set of skills. While never officially diagnosed, I think it is safe to say she has some form of Aspergers. This can make things "fun."

My brother and I (and, well everyone else) knew it made more sense for me to take over the house I grew up in (where my sister occasionally lives), but just cause it makes sense doesn't mean my sister would go for it. She's not a fan of change at all. Logical things don't always resonate with her (she won't eat Devil's Food Cake...). So how do I get her on board to let me take over the house so she can go live permanently in a better house with a better neighborhood?

Today I talk about how some things you think are hard, may not be as hard as you think. I took on the challenge of my sister, and I put off doing my taxes as long as I could.

If you are putting something off cause it looks "Hard" it may not be as hard as you think.

I do always find it weird how I can take positives and turn them into a negative.

It's always weird how any stories in my childhood involving animals of some sort have a weird outcome, In this case, it was lightning bugs.

I took a second tonight and really let myself go back to the front yard. To the time of being a kid and shouting when you achieved your goal. When the only thing you needed to worry about was if you had any empty peanut butter jars (of course you did cause you would store food in them).

It was a time when you did not have to worry about anything. You were safe. It was all about fun, friends, and fireflies.

Why is it that the people that seem to make the best points ae comedians?

The other night I watched 8:46 by Dave Chappelle. It's an amazing presentation. I also loved his last special on Netflix called Sticks and Stones. Then at 4 in the morning, it came to me:

DAVE CHAPPELLE IS MY HERO.

He makes me do all the things I said a good podcast should do. He makes me laugh, cry, think, or groan. If it doesn't do any of those it should be educating or entertaining me and DAVE DOES ALL OF THOSE.

Check him out

Dave Chappelle 8:46

Dave Chappelle Sticks and Stones Sample

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