Listen...by now, you what this show is about. We're obviously going to do a book about railing the Easter Bunny for the holiday weekend, so why not cover a book whose title is literally that? This week, we're covering Railed By the Easter Bunny by Dalia Davies, and it made for a perfect quickie of an episode for this busy holiday weekend!

CONTENT WARNING: implied domestic abuse (off-page).

So...What Are You Into?

Katie: Wildcat

Carl: The Barkley Marathons: the Race That Eats Its Young (link is for the full movie on YouTube)

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Music: "Nostalgia" by Makaih Beats

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In honor of the start of baseball season, Carl takes the reins this week and tells Katie the tale of two ballplayers in love! Join us for One True Outcome by KD Casey and bask in the heat of summer days at the park and summer nights with one very sexy pair of teammates!

Book Description:

A veteran player on a new team. The rookie who hero-worshiped him growing up. The unwritten rule they're about to break.

Everyone knows you don't fall for a teammate. Especially the rookie you're supposed to mentor. Tell that to Matt “Big Mack” Mackenzie though. Now at the tail end of his career, the one-time superstar takes an offer from the only team willing to give him a shot.

The hook? The job includes extra practice sessions with the team’s rookie catcher. The tempting, smart-mouthed Jamie DeLuca, who Mack really shouldn’t think about that way. And he definitely shouldn’t agree to after-hours video review sessions with.

The sky’s the limit for Jamie, if only he can keep his spot in the lineup. But the rookie’s on the verge of being cut. If he wants to stay on a big league roster that’ll mean extra work—and extra time with Big Mack. The guy he fantasized about playing like growing up. And then just fantasized about.

Mack’s nothing like Jamie’s fantasies. He’s better. If only Jamie could keep his attraction to the charming, generous veteran under wraps. Easier said than done, especially when the heat between them ignites.

But nothing in baseball comes with a guarantee—and the only outcome they can be certain of is the one they make for themselves.

CONTENT WARNINGS:  discussion of prior parental death due to cancer (off-page) and medical debt; on-page depictions of anxiety and chronic pain due to injury including ableism; casual drug use/drinking; power differential between characters (which is discussed and negotiated as part of the story); age gap; brief discussion of structural homophobia that does not involve slurs.

So...What Are You Into?

Katie: Writing!

Carl: MLB The Show '24

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Music: "Nostalgia" by Makaih Beats

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For this month's Author Profile, we chatted with the magnificent Shannon Elliot! Give us a listen as we dive into her latest release (Bound), the work she puts into writing queer, "quinky" books, and how her theatre background informs her approach to writing. She even drops some details from her works-in-progress!

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Music: "Nostalgia" by Makaih Beats

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This week we're celebrating fifty episodes of Cheap Smut by bringing Josh Fekete back for book three in C. Rochelle's Villainous Things series, Putting Out For a Hero, and good god was it ever a blast! Tune in as all three of us nearly hyperventilate from laughter and marvel at the machinations of the magnificent Suarez clan!

Book Description:

Baltasar

It’s time for me to start pulling my weight in the Suarez clan—to prove I’m worth more than the plays I make on the field or the dirt I dig up on rival families. I want to make Wolfy proud.

And not get unalived by Simon.

So I volunteered what I had to offer, knowing my infamous genes could be used for uniting two powerful clans in marriage. After all, I’m the only not-gay one in my family, so that alone should entice the super-babes looking to get busy with baby-making.

I mean, as long as they don’t ask me to do math or anything.

But the last supe I expected Wolfy to match me with was the ice queen hero herself, Dahlia Salah. She's not bad, but her brother is my former Deathball rival, and the only one on the planet who can make me Hulk out with a single snarky word.

All I have to do is keep my eye on the prize and ignore this weird tension between Zion and me.

I’ve totally got this.

Zion

I never would have guessed Baltasar Suarez would be the man to lock down my sister.

But shady business deals are what make our world go ‘round, and Dahlia sealed her fate when she went up against the leaders of his clan—as if she were destined for our legendary throne instead of me.

Not that I've been interested in wearing the crown.

Not after everything that happened.

Without Deathball to distract me, I spend most of my time keeping my daughter safe and happy, even though her mother is gone and my parents treat her like an outcast.

Otherwise, I’ve just been… existing. Until Baltasar showed up, as tempting as ever—reminding me of all I’ve lost, and everything I’ve ever wanted. Everything I can never have.

Or can I?

My beast—my true supe form—has already decided the villain is ours, so why not remind my backstabbing family that everything under this roof is destined to belong to me?

Starting with him.

CONTENT WARNINGS: bless you, C. Rochelle, for this exhaustive list on your website. (Scroll down for Putting Out For a Hero.)

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Music: "Nostalgia" by Makaih Beats

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Katie's back this week, and she comes bearing a doozy of a tale about Cthulhus and the women who love them and also unknowingly jerk them off in tide pools! Join us as Katie walks us through Claimed By the Cthulhu by Wendi Gogh, and you'll all about that horny misadventure, as well as the perils of having a detachable penis.

Book Description:MONSTER SPEED DATING—sounds fun, right?

Except my life as a marine biologist takes a slippery turn when I mistake a cthulhu for an octopus, only to find him seated across from me on date night.

Now, every time I turn around, he’s there.

Watching.

Winking.

Waiting until I succumb to his charm.

But I’m not ready for love. I have my studies, a mission to save the ocean, and a secret darker than the deepest depths of the sea.

Will Chaos claim me as his, or will I run from him like everyone else in my life?

CONTENT WARNINGS: past religious abuse/trauma, past sexual abuse/trauma, past birth and adaption trauma, at-risk pregnancy, newborn medical trauma (secondary character).

SEX CONTENT: monster f*cking, tentacles, a very unique piece of anatomy (hint: there's a reason this one comes right after "tentacles"), pegging.

So...What Are You Into?

Katie: Niche tea (aka hyper-specific gossip/beef)

Carl: Working out.

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BONUS LINK: "Detachable Penis" by King Missle

Music: "Nostalgia" by Makaih Beats

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When we realized that Katie would be out of commission for a week, we knew immediately who we had to call to cover for her: Gwendolyn Harper! And wouldn't you know it, she absolutely crushed it! Give us a listen as Gwendolyn and Carl cruise the Creepy Court Mall on a nostalgic trip through the 80's and ponder the mechanics of f*cking a hot coyote animatronic courtesy of Beatrix Hollow's Frankie's Funhouse!

(Note: this story originally appeared in Creepy Court, Volume 1: a Monster Mall Anthology)

Book Description:

Desperation for cash has led me down a rainbow painted hallway to Frankie’s Funhouse—a children’s gambling casino. Or as my boss likes to call it, a pizza arcade.

The coworkers are strange, the patrons are disturbing, and the animatronics are possessed. Which I was willing to put up with until my boss died.

Well, he was murdered, actually.

Now I have to serve pizza and birthday cake while thinking about burning down the mall to hide a body for an animatronic that keeps hitting on me.

Drug dealings in the backrooms, puddles of blood seeping out from the storage closet, and parents threatening to talk to my (dead) boss if I don’t get their screaming kids' pizza was all manageable...

Until I realized I didn’t mind Frankie’s possessed tongue in my mouth.

So...What Are You Into?

Gwendolyn: Yoga.

Carl: "In A Way I've Never Known" by Fernando Silverio Solis

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Music: "Nostalgia" by Makaih Beats

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By listener request, this week we're consuming Bro and the Beast (Book One) by L.C. Davis (penname of Joel Abernathy), a book so good that Katie immediately started book two just 'cause! Give us a listen as we try to unravel the mystery of how certified Bro Brad Miller has found himself in the world of his brother's favorite Shifter romance while also fanning ourselves from the heat of this unconventional Omegaverse smut-fest!

Book Description:

CONTENT WARNING: light action sequences, discussions of attempts by family members to send a secondary character to conversion therapy.

So...What Are You Into?

Katie: Agatha Christie's Marple

Carl: Chainsaw Man

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Music: "Nostalgia" by Makaih Beats

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Last week, the mere mention of this book's title broke Carl, so it should come as no surprise Katie's synopsis of Honey White and the 69 Dwarves had a similar effect. Has Honey walked into the world's most specific kink? Or will she find love amongst the Dvergar?

Book Description:

SEX CONTENT: "A lot." -Katie Mizell

So...What Are You Into?

Katie: supportive educators.

Carl: Encounters of the Spooky Kind

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Music: "Nostalgia" by Makaih Beats

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Salutations, smut denizens! Waaaaaaay back in episode one Katie promised Carl she'd read him a minotaur book, and that time is NOW! This week we're indulging in Jemma Croft's By The Horns, so if you have any burning questions about minotaurs fuck, this episode should answer at least a few of those questions!Book Description:When she stumbled into the wrong classroom at night school, she never expected to find love. Especially not with a minotaur.Joey Silver likes things fast. Life, relationships, driving. But when she mixes up the rooms and walks into Cake Decorating 101 instead of the speed correctional course she’s been ordered to do, she finds herself in uncharted territory. He’s there. He’s big, and surly. So surly. And he’s definitely not human. How can Joey save her car and career, and at the same time, grab the bull by the horns?

CONTENT WARNING: themes of discrimination, threats of violence, casual drug use, and descriptions of dead animal flesh.

So...What Are You Into?

Katie: Stretching 

Carl: Hell Is A World Without You by Jason Kirk

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Music: "Nostalgia" by Makaih Beats

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WE'RE BACK, BABY! After a much-needed hiatus, Katie and Carl are back, and they're kicking off season two with an absolute banger of a book: Initiation by Alethea Faust! Come for Katie recounting her time in the Smut Wars, but stay for a tale of polyamorous sex wizards!

Book Description:

Magic is a rare gift that only exists in the bloodlines of the rich, the royal, and the reputable. Dominai of Airedale, a poor hunter and forest guide, is barely one of those things. But after a moonlit encounter with the wizard Allisande, Dominai's life is changed forever. She reveals that Dominai has magic in his lineage and provides him with a letter of introduction to the Crux, the center of magical study in the Kingdom of Straetham.

Magical study is a far cry from the dusty tomes and rituals Dom was expecting. Instead, it is sex and desire, submission and surrender, loyalty and love, and, above all, trust. But when the trust of the Crux is betrayed, Dom must face his own insecurities and the unknown to protect his new home and his fellow wizards.

Alethea Faust’s debut novel delivers risk-aware consensual kink, hard BDSM, budding relationships between kind, emotionally mature adults, and a lot of butt stuff.

CONTENT WARNING: rape and sexual assault.

SEX CONTENT: a kink-based magic system, the description of which appears at the beginning of each chapter.

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Music: "Nostalgia" by Makaih Beats

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