Like Blake and his leper colony in John Carpenter's

Tonight it is a plant stem masquerading as a wand

Good Evening, Match Scratchers!

Welcome to CAMPFIRE SCARYTALES!

"When midnight chimes, we both will meet,

Podcasting slick, sick tales to scare;

Master your fear, stoke dying heat--

Embrace the coal's glowing orange glare."

 If you once enjoyed, still enjoy or will enjoy

We are the Match Scratchers, this is Campfire

Between midnight and first light we meet, our

How will we present this concomitant Campfire

Today, you are tricked or treated, depending on your

Podcasted for the Auditory Approval of the Match

Your host: That's Falsetto, No Mr. accent on the to

Until next time, Match Scratchers!

Remember, only you can prevent forest fires, call

(Procrastinated Statement) *Intro/outro song, Surrender, courtesy of the artist, Asher Fulero, with a medley of sound effects added for, you guessed it, effect.

Alternate Emotion, Delete and Escape Control

Control your emotions, Alternate their perception, Delete the witnesses-- Escape!

Greetings, Cinematic Fanatics! Allow Brother Brooks

You are our Cinematic Fanatics; we, your worthwhile f****** cinephiles. For your 47th episode, King Leo/Brother Brooks and I review one of our most cherished, respected and feared entries in the Alex Garland portfolio of cinematic work: a

Enter, with us, you cinematic

Today, we discuss--the limitless kudos we can launch

- Your worthwhile cinephile: If it were me, Ava, I

P.S. (Procrastinated Statement) *Intro/outro song, Soulicious, courtesy of the artist, Dyalla.

Good Evening, Match Scratchers

If you once enjoyed, still enjoy or will enjoy

Between midnight and first light we meet, our

Collect your new batch of Match Scratcher sheep,

Your host: That's Falsetto, No Mr. accent on the to

Until next time, Match Scratchers!

Remember, only you can prevent forest fires, call

(Procrastinated Statement) *Intro/outro song, Surrender, courtesy of the artist, Asher Fulero, with a medley of sound effects added for, you guessed it, effect.

Welcome to this Slick Chapstick Flick Pick!

This is a flick about loss, grief, mistaken fstars

Greetings, Cinematic Fanatics! Allow us the

- Your worthwhile cinephile: False Prophet but true

P.S. (Procrastinated Statement) *Intro/outro song, Soulicious, courtesy of the artist, Dyalla.

Greetings Cinematic Fanatics, in this particular case, you Hellbound Book Hounds! The only thing more satisfying than a gorgeous and flawlessly executed standalone Slick Flick Pick is one that honors, if not exceeds, the splendor of its novel source material.

Sometimes a screenplay, or film, has been novelized into a riveting read;

While I will not perform this companion, contrast/comparison analysis between the primitive novel and polished flick on every Slick Flick Pick, I will grant you the gift of an either/or/both discussion when I find the right pairing of bound paper and waxy film. Enjoy you Hellbound Book Hounds and Cinematic Fanatics as I investigate these various bound collections and similar comparisons to their corresponding flick-- remain on track with your deft, rapt attention in tact through an aurally pleasing perusal as you sate your curiosity with each passing slick flick/page flip pleasure on my Chemohawk rack.

Snuggle the fstars up with a bloody, slick HellBound Book in your secretive nook.

As you earn each paper cut, you'll feel these fully fleshed out characters in your gut.

Whether binding open or cover shut, you've wed the novel--the flick serves merely as your mistress slut.

Here, we unwind some novel binding for this is where final cut greets papercut!

The Slick Flick Pick we will be discussing: Pick 45: Slick Flick

Our protagonist, war vet hero Easy, sometime sleazy Rawlins finds himself in too deep, far over his head as his curiosity ushers him to an unseemly, unsafe place where streets run the color of her lips: blood red.

Today you are gifted the treat of audibly checking out this edition **Fifth selection of Slick Page Flip** from my Chemohawk Library Rack: Hellbound Binding 5: Slick Page Flip: Devilish Devil in Blue Dress Distress (Blond/Brunette with a Cigarette); (Easy Reading/Book Comparison between Novel and Film: Devil in a Blue Dress)

- Your freestyle logophile, bibliophile and cinephile: Falsetto Prophet

P.S. (Procrastinated Statement) *Intro/outro song, Soulicious, courtesy of the artist, Dyalla.

Greetings, Cinematic Fanatics!

Allow me the tried and true, mixed-race devil in dress blue, post world war 2, both fun for me and for you, playing the podcasting role of a privately investigating gumshoe, with nothing to do but tend to my small Los Angeles home's garden, sleep on my porch, drink from the bottle and follow this deadly dame and obsess over where she is at, whether she is home or the coop she flew, this proves a dangerous world I will be walking for truths are half or less and people's motivations askew, I frequent bars above butcher shops and illegal bars, I'm Easy in a speakeasy and, with me, the local law likes to screw, on noirish thoughts I'll have to stew, a cloudy, concealed, cigarette smoke-filled lens obstructs my view, but this lethal mission to present for you I must see through for that mortgage payment on my suburban home is due; 

You're my Cinematic Fanatics; I, your worthwhile cinephile.

There are competently executed scenes of swift violence, patient smoldering scenes of audible but subdued dialogue with a Denzel voiceover that does not annoy and where the sexy dames are good at three activities: smoking cigarettes, drinking bourbon straight up and remaining coy, cigarettes will also be used as a plot prop and ploy, with Easy's emotions both the strumpets and his so called friends will toy, but differentiating what is the real McCoy from decoy, will he be able to solve and settle, before his life, these underworld forces destroy?

Today, we discuss--the dangers of leaving your godda** door unlocked to your front door connected to a house you are imponderably proud to be paying a mortgage on, the inconsistency with Easy letting Coretta grind all up on his night stick to extract information about Daphne, but passing on Daphne's advances, in her sultry blue dress in a tense hotel room when she is practically sitting on his godda** lap with a cigarette in hand and a pretty head with well combed hair strands, the gall it takes to break into a man's house, make a bologna sandwich in his kitchen and then ask him to bring YOU HIS liquor, all of the inherent dangers in leaving anybody in the hands of a trigger-happy Mouse, the delectable nature of pig tails and feet and the repeated reminders that the men in this slick flick value their real, tangible property more than the women: Joppy and his marble bar, Easy and his quasi owned home, Mouse and his guns, but let's be real the dames shown in this flick all have an angle, they let their dresses fall and their shoes dangle, they are scheming and, for intel, tag-teaming and none of them are nuns.

- Your worthwhile cinephile

P.S. (Procrastinated Statement) *Intro/outro song, Soulicious, courtesy of the artist, Dyalla.

Greetings, Cinematic Fanatics!

Allow us the trying, taxing, spirit-crushing, soul-killing, legally thrilling, car-bombing, cab ride-calming and thankless task of shadowing, for the length of this 2 hour emotionally cathartic journey, a well-groomed but morally doomed man, who--though a GQ model--is far from a model citizen, who adjusts, shades, bends and distorts the truth under the cover of night, morally dim and/or ambiguous lighting or through loopholes, blackmail and owed favors, Clayton is a man with

You're my Cinematic Fanatic; I, your worthwhile f****** cinephile.

For your 44th episode, I review a flick I fondly remember, but upon rewatch wish in the campaign to officially sell, talk up and vote for this slick flick, I wish I was an official member. I rented this fine, legally slick, dialogue quick, corporation corrupting, one fixer's life disrupting flick pick from Blockbuster and watched it while transfixed by this fixer and mesmerized by Clooney's disenchanted eyes, as he navigates their

I offer you: Pick 44: Slick Flick Pick: Outhouse Counsel-- Don't Carpool with Clayton (Memo Alarming, Fixer Strong-Arming and Car Bomb Disarming);  (Michael Clayton, 2007)

Today, we discuss--the life saving value of recognizing the dangers, both overt and covert, of your GPS suddenly shorting out on the fritz, how stopping to smell a wayside horse might just prove the life-saving course, that even when you add some pounds and hold back the man's

-Your worthwhile cinephile: Falsetto Prophet and Red Devil.

P.S. (Procrastinated Statement) *Intro/outro song, Soulicious, courtesy of the artist, Dyalla.

Greetings, Cinematic Fanatics!

Allow me westernized, cannibalized, stabbing both westward and any upright bipedal who stands in their way, bisecting and dissecting pleasure of ushering you through the cracked, dusty and dried ground, blood-soaked, cave fire stoked and subsequent crime scene after their precious grave site is disturbed and provoked, this is a slow burning slick flick that a little past midway becomes a stomach-churning, panic-inducing, potboiler, the violence is blunt and extreme, and you will surely want to scream, but if you tell yourself it is not a real nightmare, rather a cinematic dream with a shock and awe theme, you will remind yourself that things are not as brutal and unforgiving as they seem, but I am on your team and it is my pleasure esteem to this flick redeem by gifting you this shocking, sensational, stupendous, scary, superior western/horror hybrid treat of Slick Flick Pick, an entertaining, slick/flick-explaining series, a desirable diversion from the main tomahawked and scalped forehead vein of Chemohawk Sessions.

You're my Cinematic Fanatics; I, your worthwhile f****** cinephile. For your 43rd episode, my bicolor compadre, Othello, and I review one of our most feared, appreciated and applauded western genre entries of yore with a terrifyingly torturous twist in the Kurt Russell compendium of solid work: a bleak, haunting, menacing, gorgeously shot and choreographed, excruciatingly well-acted and written with proficient pacing and a cathartically pleasing conclusion to the terrors that befall a town and the quartet who rides, then walks then sacrifices much to save those who were, mostly all, abducted, imprisoned, bisected and eaten, this is a flick that does not pull its trogfuc**** punches, the question still lingers, which of our human cast will end up these savages' godd*** lunches?

Today, we discuss-- the dangers of trusting anyone mofo who approaches your camp in a furtive manner in the dark, the brilliance, economy and utility behind using a string of bells configuration as

- Your worthwhile cinephile: Eyes like a hawk, wit sharp as a trog killing tomahawk-Falsetto Prophet

P.S. (Procrastinated Statement) *Intro/outro song, Soulicious, courtesy of the artist, Dyalla.

F.C.F.U. Fact-Check Follow up: Everything I Touch by Stabbing

Greetings, Cinematic Fanatics! Before we begin with

We offer you the guiltless

Enter, with us, you cinematic fanatics, into the realm of film's fantasy while we unwind the grind of reality… We offer you: Pick 42: Slick

Today, we discuss-- If you're far too pompous in your pride; so foolish, you let John Doe inside, you would be better to, the killer, not deride, be honest with yourself and not the truth, elide, him--with his newfound limp-- she may outrun, but in her apartment there are too few

- Your worthwhile cinephile: Falsetto Prophet and RED DEVIL!

P.S. (Procrastinated Statement) *Intro/outro song, Soulicious, courtesy of the artist, Dyalla.

Fact Check Follow Ups:

Paperback books are expensive due to the rising cost of

The Usual Suspects came out in 1995.

12 Monkeys came out in 1995.

Greetings, Cinematic Fanatics!

Allow your not quite long in the tooth, but your falsetto soothsayer of every hot, lukewarm or cold hard truth the imperceptible pleasure of proscribing, for your lethargy, a stimulating cocktail of a slick side-effect-laden flick where things are inverted and distorted far from what they seem, where into a pillow Rooney will scream and the surreal music coupled with the fog bank hazy film style convinces even the most lucid that they're in the thick and thicket of a dream, here they'll go against medical advice and what their doctors deem; the antagonizing, agonizing bicurious tag team, mayhem wreaking, ill-gotten gains seeking sightly, sensual and seductive duo pull wicked wool over even the keenest eyes through delivery of well-practiced lies and strategic exposure of toned, smooth appetizing thighs. Rooney Mara, on our emotional psyches leaves an indelible scar-a, though she be but a little swallower of a proscribed pill, she is ferocious in her knife slashing kill, this is not a flick with a series of kinetic thrills, nor a rampant trail of kills, rather a slow-burning, stomach-churning climax earning production and though not a licensed physician, I am somewhat of a cinephilic magician tasked with the satisfying task of gifting you this shocking, sensational, stupendous, scary, scandalous, salacious and sordid treat of Slick Flick Pick, an entertaining, slick/flick-explaining series, a desirable diversion from the main pill-popping vein of Chemohawk Sessions. You're my Cinematic Fanatic; I, your worthwhile f****** cinephile.

For your 41st episode, I review one of our my most curious, intelligent, Hitchcockian and psychologically fulfilling entries in Soderbergh collection: a trippy, faux tranquil, socially relevant as it is malevolent superbly acted by an attractive godd*** cast with performances that stand the test of time and last, every actor playing off each other and

Enter, with me, you cinematic fanatics, into the realm of film's fantasy while we unwind the grind of reality… I offer you: Slick Flick Pick:

- Your worthwhile cinephile: The prescriber of your slick medicinal flicks, Dr. Falsetto Prophet

P.S. (Procrastinated Statement) *Intro/outro song, Soulicious, courtesy of the artist, Dyalla.