Krampus is back and he’s got a song in his “heart”! The guys read a new wintery book by “special request”! Everyone’s all “Daryl in the Halls and John in the Oates”! It’s a “gnarly” Choosemastime!

Also, someone is a sweety widdle kitty cat, Chris foists a Surprise Holiday Caroloke on Matt, Matt challenges Chris to a round of Interactive Fiction or Scary Place Krampus Said He Would Drag Turd Brother To While He Was Asleep and He Would Wake Up There and Be So Scared, and our older friend Dan gets help with a move – NOT!

On Krampus Days, these Krampus Days
We celebrate Your glory
Lord Krampus Beast, great Krampus Beast,
We hail your gory story
Your sulphur stench withers our youth,
Your seven tongues can taste our truth
Your visage at my windowsill;
I close my eyes yet see you still
On Krampus Days, these Krampus Days
We worship Your true Power
On Krampus Days we offer You
Our sanity to devour
Your poison crown of dripping horns
Will rid us of our human forms
Oh Krampus Thing, Great Krampus Thing
You are the One True Winter King

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Illustration by Tom La Padula