“Don’t judge” is one of the most quoted — and most misunderstood — phrases in Christian culture.

In this Here’s the Lesson mini episode, we unpack what Jesus actually taught about judgment, discernment, and accountability. Christ never asked us to abandon truth in the name of love. He warned against hypocrisy — not righteous judgment.

We explore the difference between condemning people and discerning fruit, why “don’t judge” is often used to deflect accountability, and how truth spoken with humility is not unchristian — it’s loving.

Here’s the lesson:
Discernment isn’t judgment.
Avoidance is.

Take what’s good. Leave the rest.

If these conversations matter to you, we share a weekly note with deeper reflections on faith, boundaries, and truth. You’re welcome to join us. Click here for more.

What did Jesus actually mean when He said, “turn the other cheek”?

For many, this teaching has been misunderstood—and misused—to encourage silence, endurance, and even compliance in the face of harm. In this episode of Here’s the Lesson, we slow down and place Christ’s words back into their original context.

This conversation explores the difference between refusing retaliation and refusing safety, how scripture can be weaponized to protect abuse, and why Jesus consistently modeled both love and wisdom.

Boundaries are not a lack of faith.

Peace is not passivity.

And Christ never asks us to endure abuse to prove our righteousness.

If these conversations matter to you, we share a weekly note with deeper reflections on faith, boundaries, and truth. You’re welcome to join us. ⁠Click here⁠ for more.

This isn’t a full episode — just a short reflection.

In this Here’s the Lesson segment from Leave Then Cleave, Jon explores why boundaries are often mislabeled as betrayal, especially in families and faith-based relationships.

Boundaries aren’t rejection.
They’re clarity.

If someone experiences your boundary as abandonment, it may be because they were used to access without accountability.

This is a reminder that love doesn’t require self-abandonment — and choosing health is not unchristlike.

Take what fits. Leave the rest.

If these conversations matter to you, we share a weekly note with deeper reflections on faith, boundaries, and truth. You’re welcome to join us. ⁠⁠Click here⁠⁠ for more.

Also, A Favor to Ask: If this episode, or any of our others resonate with you... Please subscribe and rate this podcast! It will help us reach others that need this message too!

This isn’t a full episode — just a short reflection.

In this Here’s the Lesson segment from Leave Then Cleave, Jon explores the difference between peace and avoidance, especially when silence is mistaken for righteousness.

Forgiveness was never meant to erase truth.
And love was never meant to require self-betrayal.

This is a moment for anyone who’s been told that speaking up is unchristlike, that boundaries are prideful, or that naming harm means you lack faith.

Take what fits. Leave the rest.

If these conversations matter to you, we share a weekly note with deeper reflections on faith, boundaries, and truth. You’re welcome to join us. ⁠⁠Click here⁠⁠ for more.

Also, A Favor to Ask: If this episode, or any of our others resonate with you... Please subscribe and rate this podcast! It will help us reach others that need this message too!

Welcome to Cleave — formerly The Living in Truth Project Podcast.

In this reboot episode, Jon and Ashley introduce what Cleave is all about: honest, long-form conversations on marriage, family dynamics, boundaries, healing, faith, and emotional health.

We share the story behind the name Cleave — what it means to leave what’s unhealthy and cleave to what’s true — and what you can expect from this new season, including topics like forgiveness, spiritual manipulation, triangulation, grief, and rebuilding your identity.

If you’re trying to break cycles, strengthen your marriage, and build a healthier life with clarity and truth… you’re in the right place.

🎧 New episodes weekly
💬 Send us your questions — future episodes may be Q&A style

If these conversations matter to you, we share a weekly note with deeper reflections on faith, boundaries, and truth. You’re welcome to join us. ⁠⁠Click here⁠⁠ for more.

Also, A Favor to Ask: If this episode, or any of our others resonate with you... Please subscribe and rate this podcast! It will help us reach others that need this message too!

Wicked is not the story we all thought it was.
In this episode of Cleave, I break down the emotional and psychological layers inside one of Broadway’s biggest hits — and why its message hits differently as an adult.
We talk:
• the Wizard’s manipulation
• Glinda’s toxic charm
• the recipe for creating a scapegoat
• the cost of choosing integrity
• and why Elphaba is one of the most important “heroes” we have today
I also share how this story mirrors real patterns my wife and I have lived through — and why so many of us find ourselves cast as villains the moment we stand up to dysfunction.
If you’ve ever defied gravity in your own life, you’ll feel seen in this one.

What happens when the ideal of “eternal family” meets the reality of imperfection and grief? In this powerful episode, Jon Lefrandt reflects on the doctrine behind family, partnership, and divine order—through the lens of his own loss, love, and lived experience. A heartfelt look at what it means to cleave to one another, to God, and to the hope that no family is ever truly lost.

Understanding Epigenetics and Generational Trauma Through LDS Doctrine

In today’s world, the intersection of religious beliefs and modern science offers profound insights into our understanding of human behavior and healing. This episode explores how trauma can be passed down through generations, the role of angels and ancestors in healing, and how LDS teachings can help us break these cycles and live in truth.

The Science of Epigenetics

Epigenetics examines how our behaviors and environment can cause changes in gene expression without altering the DNA sequence. These changes, though reversible, can be passed down through generations, influencing stress responses and mental health. Dr. Rachel Yehuda's research on Holocaust survivors and their descendants shows that trauma experienced by parents can affect their children's stress responses.

Generational Trauma and Its Impact

Generational trauma refers to the transmission of trauma's effects across generations. Research indicates that children of parents who experienced significant trauma are more likely to develop PTSD, anxiety, and depression. Dr. Gabor Maté explains that generational trauma affects both psychological symptoms and chronic physical illnesses, emphasizing the need to address these inherited struggles compassionately.

LDS Doctrine on Generational Sin

Scriptures such as Deuteronomy 5:9-10 and Doctrine and Covenants 98:47 highlight the generational impact of sin and behavior. These teachings align with epigenetic findings, suggesting that our actions affect future generations. Elder Jeffrey R. Holland emphasizes compassion and understanding towards human frailty, crucial for breaking negative cycles and promoting healing.

The Role of Angels and Ancestors

LDS doctrine teaches that ancestors and angels play an active role in our lives, assisting in healing family lines and breaking generational cycles. Temple work, including baptisms for the dead, connects the living with their ancestors, fostering mutual growth and healing. Elder Jeffrey R. Holland and Doctrine and Covenants 128:15 highlight the vital connection between generations, reinforcing the importance of family history work.

The Power of the Temple Endowment

The temple endowment provides spiritual blessings and insights, offering protection and strength against generational trauma. President Russell M. Nelson and Brigham Young emphasize the endowment's role in equipping individuals with the spiritual tools necessary for daily resilience.

Breaking the Cycle

Understanding family history and patterns is the first step in breaking generational trauma. Therapy, mindfulness, and spiritual practices like prayer offer tools for healing. Setting boundaries and seeking supportive communities are crucial for escaping toxic environments. Oprah Winfrey's insights on trauma emphasize transforming past experiences into sources of strength and resilience.

Living in Truth

Embracing both positive and negative aspects of our family history is essential for living in truth. Integrating LDS teachings with modern psychology provides a holistic approach to overcoming generational trauma. Doctrine and Covenants 121:45 and Elder Dieter F. Uchtdorf's teachings encourage love, virtue, and perseverance in breaking negative cycles and promoting healing.

Conclusion

The past shapes us, but it doesn't define us. By understanding our history and seeking truth, we can create a brighter future for ourselves and future generations. The study of epigenetics and generational trauma, combined with LDS teachings, offers profound insights into our ability to heal and transform. With the support of our ancestors and heavenly beings, we can break negative cycles and live in truth, creating a legacy of healing and righteousness for future generations.

Tune in to explore the intersection of epigenetics and LDS doctrine, and discover practical steps for breaking generational cycles and living a life of truth and healing.

In Episode 10 of the "Living and Truth Project" podcast, hosts Jon Lefrandt and Ashley Lefrandt recap the Saturday afternoon session of a recent general conference, focusing on powerful messages from Elder Garrett W. Gong, Brother Michael T. Nelson, and Elder Quinton L. Cook. The discussions revolve around key themes of personal trials, spiritual growth, and the profound impacts of Christ's atonement.

Episode 9: "Deepening Faith and Understanding in the Afternoon Session"