Co-creating Peace

Among the most vulnerable times in a person’s life are those times when they are ill or injured and have to put their wellbeing – sometimes their very life – into the hands of healthcare professionals. We feel scared, vulnerable, alone, even when surrounded by loved ones. In many ways it is a very solitary, often terrifying journey. More than anything in the world, we need to feel nurtured, safe, and truly cared about. 

Melanie Sears, a retired nurse, as well as a practitioner & teacher of Non-violent Communication for over 30 years joins me again for an inspiring conversation about ways that we all can bring empathy into our conversations about mental and physical health issues with the persons who are facing them. In Episode #123, I had a great conversation with Melanie about the companion workbook to “Humanizing Healthcare”, “Choose Your Words”.

Enjoy “Humanizing Healthcare”, Episode #124 of Co-creating Peace, a podcast series about conscious communication and conflict transformation.

Guided by NVC principles, Melanie crafted a new approach that replaces 'power over' with 'power with', and domination with collaboration, empowering people to foster connections and nurture empathy in the healthcare arenas. 

 Highlights you won’t want to miss include:

• From domination to partnership 
• How Nonviolent Communication transformed a high-risk psychiatric unit 
• The importance of demonstrating empathy without diverting attention to yourself
• Using empathy to support people through physical & emotional crises

Melanie works with couples and individuals as a coach and empath. Contact Melanie at: [email protected]. You can learn more about Melanie and her work at: https://dnadialogues.com. Find her books at: https://www.nonviolentcommunication.com/shop or on Amazon.

Please support Co-creating Peace:

• Subscribe to Co-creating Peace on your favorite podcast provider
• Send me your ideas for topics & guests or be a guest to talk about your communication or conflict resolution challenges & receive free communication coaching
• Share on social media & tell the world about Co-creating Peace! 
• Become a patron at www.patreon.com/CocreatingPeace

Share your thoughts, reactions, feedback & ideas with me. I'd love to hear from you!

Please support Co-creating Peace:

• Subscribe to Co-creating Peace on your favorite podcast provider
• Send me your ideas for topics and guests or be a guest to talk about your communication or conflict resolution challenges and receive free communication coaching
• Share on social media & tell the world about Co-creating Peace! 
• Become a patron at www.patreon.com/CocreatingPeace

 Visit BridgesofPeace.com to learn more about Kathleen and her work.

Our greatest power tool for building relationships, and our most devastating weapon for destroying them is our use of words. It’s not only the words themselves, but how and when they are delivered that can make the difference between the construction and the destruction of positive connection and harmony.

In Episode #122, I spoke with Terre Short, author of “The Words We Choose” Your Guide to How and Why Words Matter. To continue the theme of speaking mindfully, I am joined today by Melanie Sears, a retired nurse who has been a student, practitioner, and teacher of Non-violent Communication for over 30 years, who will share wisdom about choosing our words from the perspective of Nonviolent Communication (NVC).

Enjoy “Choose Your Words”, Episode #123 of Co-creating Peace, a podcast series about conscious communication and conflict transformation. 

Highlights you won’t want to miss include:

• Nonviolent communication and understanding feelings
• The relationship between our feelings and our needs
• Who is responsible for the feelings people experience
• Speaking without judgement
• The value of giving yourself empathy

Melanie Sears has been a student of Nonviolent Communication (NVC) for more than thirty years. She has written three books based on NVC principles. Humanizing Health Care, followed by a workbook, Choose Your Words in two versions: one geared toward professionals who work in health care and the other one geared to caregivers and family members caring for someone with a psychiatric disorder. Humanizing Health Care is translated into German, Korean, Japanese and Chinese. 

Choose Your Words was written as a companion workbook for Humanizing Health Care, it is also a wonderful stand-alone workbook that anyone can learn and benefit from. I want to share it with you before Humanizing Health Care because it is a great follow-up to Episode #122 in providing tools for mindful, conscious communication. Next time, in Episode #124, Melanie & I will talk about Humanizing Health Care.

Melanie works with couples and individuals as a coach and empath. Contact Melanie at: [email protected]. You can learn more about Melanie and her work at: https://dnadialogues.com. Find her books at: https://www.nonviolentcommunication.com/shop/ or on Amazon.

Melanie will join us again the weekend of September 9 to tell us about the companion book to Choose Your Words: Humanizing Health Care. 

Share your thoughts, reactions, feedback & ideas with me. I'd love to hear from you!

Please support Co-creating Peace:

• Subscribe to Co-creating Peace on your favorite podcast provider
• Send me your ideas for topics and guests or be a guest to talk about your communication or conflict resolution challenges and receive free communication coaching
• Share on social media & tell the world about Co-creating Peace! 
• Become a patron at www.patreon.com/CocreatingPeace

 Visit BridgesofPeace.com to learn more about Kathleen and her work.

Have you ever noticed how much chatter is going on in your head? You know what I mean – that internal narrative I spoke about in Episode #8: “Don’t Believe Everything You Think”. Sometimes that internal narrative, which today’s guest calls our “personal podcast”, can lead us down a detrimental road, one that causes us pain, upset, and conflict, and which can have that same effect on the people in our life.

Join me for “Peace is an Inside Job”, Episode #122 of Co-creating Peace, a podcast series about conscious communication and conflict transformation.  

Author, teacher and coach, Terre Short, joins me today with some great insights into how we can better co-create peace in our lives by recognizing when our thoughts are going down what she calls “the yellow brick road” of negative thinking, and then pivot our thinking in a more constructive, non-violent direction, creating more peaceful outcomes, both internally & externally.

Terre provides insights about the importance of evaluating our values and intentions, and why our personal narrative heavily influences our interactions with the world. 

Highlights you won’t want to miss include:

• The importance of being mindful of our internal dialogue and how it influences our experiences,
• We can develop the ability to recognize when our thoughts are heading in a detrimental direction & pivot our thought processes to a more constructive path;
• Being mindful of our word choices, both internally & externally affects what we experience, both internally & externally;
• Terre offers Co-creating Peace listeners their choice of great incentives to attend her upcoming Sept. retreat!

Terre Short, MBA, is an author, speaker, coach and creator of Thriving Leader Collaborative. She believes that truly authentic leadership is achieved when we embrace our inner wisdom to overcome business challenges. As a NeuroMindfulness Practitioner, Terre lives at the intersection of wellbeing and leadership and has spent the last decade advising high performing Fortune 500 leaders on how to explore intuitive pathways to success. Terre is the author of The Words We Choose: Your Guide to How and Why Words Matter.

Contact Terre at: [email protected]
Learn more about Terre & her work (and register for her upcoming September retreat) at: www.ThrivingLeaderCollaborative.com 

Please support Co-creating Peace:

• Subscribe to Co-creating Peace on your favorite podcast provider
• Send me your ideas for topics & guests or be a guest to talk about your communication or conflict resolution challenges & receive free communication coaching
• Share on social media & tell the world about Co-creating Peace! 
• Become a patron at www.patreon.com/CocreatingPeace

Share your thoughts, reactions, feedback & ideas with me. I'd love to hear from you!

Please support Co-creating Peace:

• Subscribe to Co-creating Peace on your favorite podcast provider
• Send me your ideas for topics and guests or be a guest to talk about your communication or conflict resolution challenges and receive free communication coaching
• Share on social media & tell the world about Co-creating Peace! 
• Become a patron at www.patreon.com/CocreatingPeace

 Visit BridgesofPeace.com to learn more about Kathleen and her work.

Even before the COVID-19 pandemic gave us our first experience of health-related lock-downs in the US in current times, isolation and loneliness have been a growing problem for many people. It's gotten to the point that the U.S. surgeon general published an advisory outlining his concerns about the public health crisis of loneliness, isolation, and lack of connection in our country earlier this year. Disconnection fundamentally affects our mental, physical & societal health. 

Fortunately, Coach Lee Hopkins is working diligently to help others create new relationships to bring joy and connection into their lives.

Coach Lee Hopkins has been a guest on this podcast a few times in the past. He joined us in Episode #77 when he told us about a very powerful boundaries framework that he has created, which he calls 3N Boundaries. Then in Episodes #80 & #81 Coach Lee shared some important insights & tools to help us understand more about our grudges & how to constructively work with them. Coach Lee joins us again today to share some great insights & tools about ways that we can build strong, mutually beneficial connections with others.

Welcome to “Building Meaningful Connections in an Era of Loneliness”, Episode #121 of Co-creating Peace.

Some highlights are:

• The Importance of sharing your truth
• Mindful sharing and contextual TMI 
• How to initiate making meaningful connections when others seem reserved
• The J.I.S.T. storytelling method as a way to begin to create a meaningful connection with someone

Make sure you go to the Patterns of Possibility website & register for the Annual Social Connections Summit (Aug. 5 & 6) by clicking on the Annual Summit 2023 link.
When you click on the “For Individuals” link on the homepage, in addition to the other great information there, you will find a Free Resources link with some really great free tools to help you build stronger connections with yourself, as well as others. The “For Organizations” link on the home page takes you to some excellent information & tools which can be tailored to almost any group, even an informal one.

Please support Co-creating Peace:

• Subscribe to Co-creating Peace on your favorite podcast provider
• Send me your ideas for topics & guests or be a guest to talk about your communication or conflict resolution challenges & receive free communication coaching
• Share on social media & tell the world about Co-creating Peace! 
• Become a patron at www.patreon.com/CocreatingPeace

Share your thoughts, reactions, feedback & ideas with me. I'd love to hear from you!

Please support Co-creating Peace:

• Subscribe to Co-creating Peace on your favorite podcast provider
• Send me your ideas for topics and guests or be a guest to talk about your communication or conflict resolution challenges and receive free communication coaching
• Share on social media & tell the world about Co-creating Peace! 
• Become a patron at www.patreon.com/CocreatingPeace

 Visit BridgesofPeace.com to learn more about Kathleen and her work.

Have you ever considered how your subconscious beliefs might be affecting your relationships and communication? In this episode, Judy Kane, founder of Aligned Consciousness, and I delve into the ways our subconscious beliefs shape our communication and boundaries, and how being aware of them can help us make more equitable decisions and prioritize our own goals. 

We also discuss how our compliance with other people's expectations may stem from our underlying beliefs and cause potential conflicts in our relationships. We look at how these hidden beliefs can conflict with our conscious goals and shape our reality. Recognizing these beliefs can greatly benefit our interactions with others and lead to healthier connections. Judy will also share some valuable insights on aligning your conscious and subconscious beliefs to foster healthier, more fulfilling relationships.

Welcome to “Journey to Deeper Connections: Aligning Conscious & Subconscious Beliefs”, Episode #120 of Co-creating Peace, a series about conscious communication and conflict transformation. 

Highlights you won’t want to miss include:

1. Some of the possible origins of our beliefs – both conscious and unconscious
2. How our beliefs affect how we connect with others
3. The relationship between beliefs and boundaries
4. 3 things you can do to increase awareness of your subconscious beliefs and change how they affect your life
5. Ways we can begin to align our conscious and subconscious beliefs

Judy Kane, founder of Aligned Consciousness, helps people identify and transform subconscious beliefs that keep them repeating ineffective, stressful patterns. Her clients experience changes which allow them to achieve their goals —with ease and comfort. She is the author of Your4Truths: How Beliefs Impact Your Life. Judy also hosts workshops and presents in group sessions, conferences, and podcasts.

To learn more about Judy Kane and aligning your consciousness, visit her website at: alignedconsciousness.com, where you can also find her book, Your4Truths – How Beliefs Impact Your Life. You can also find Judy on LinkedIn and Facebook

Please support Co-creating Peace:

• Subscribe to Co-creating Peace on your favorite podcast provider
• Send me your ideas for topics & guests or be a guest to talk about your communication or conflict resolution challenges & receive free communication coaching.
• Share on social media & tell the world about Co-creating Peace! 
• Become a patron at www.patreon.com/CocreatingPeace

Share your thoughts, reactions, feedback & ideas with me. I'd love to hear from you!

Please support Co-creating Peace:

• Subscribe to Co-creating Peace on your favorite podcast provider
• Send me your ideas for topics and guests or be a guest to talk about your communication or conflict resolution challenges and receive free communication coaching
• Share on social media & tell the world about Co-creating Peace! 
• Become a patron at www.patreon.com/CocreatingPeace

 Visit BridgesofPeace.com to learn more about Kathleen and her work.

Despite our best intentions and efforts, marriage doesn’t always work out exactly the way we planned; sometimes it doesn’t work out at all! Both marriage and its dissolution can be filled with rancor and conflict, or they can be opportunities for collaboration and growth; sometimes all the above.

Whether it’s a marriage in progress or one that is ending, people can make a conscious choice about how they want to approach conflict and its resolution. Mediation can be an integral ingredient in a constructive outcome that builds or restructures a relationship, rather than destroying it.

Welcome to “The Accidental Marriage – Re-Framing Divorce”, Episode #119 of Co-creating Peace, a series about conscious communication and conflict transformation. 

In this episode, Debra Oliver, a mediator with over 30 years of experience, & I explore the concept of an 'accidental marriage’: the complexities of attraction that can lead to subconscious and assumed agreements which may cause issues later in the relationship. We’ll also discuss important details negotiated in a divorce mediation that divorcing parents often overlook, such as parenting styles, long-term finances, and the legal rights of each parent. 

Highlights of our conversation include:

• How unspoken expectations and implied agreements can lead to conflict in relationships
• How positive divorce experiences are possible 
• The importance of trained divorce mediators
• How collaborative divorce & co-parenting can benefit children
• Ethics & limitations of divorce mediators 

Debra Oliver, founder of Common Ground Mediation Services, has been a mediator and trainer since 1989. She has served over ten thousand clients and trainees in the US, Nepal and Russia. She serves a variety of businesses, non-profits, and state agencies, as well as specializing in Restorative Justice, Family Dynamics, and Divorce. Debra has worked with law enforcement agencies and municipalities, providing training and community dialogue services. Debra was also a founding partner , along with myself and 3 others, in Community Dialogue Network, LLC, an organization that provided community-wide dialogues on public perspectives, especially in response to community crises.

To learn more about Debra Oliver and her work, visit her website: www.commonground-adr.org

Please support Co-creating Peace:

• Subscribe to Co-creating Peace on your favorite podcast provider
• Send me your ideas for topics & guests or be a guest to talk about your communication or conflict resolution challenges & receive free communication coaching.
• Share on social media & tell the world about Co-creating Peace! 
• Become a patron at www.patreon.com/CocreatingPeace

Share your thoughts, reactions, feedback & ideas with me. I'd love to hear from you!

Please support Co-creating Peace:

• Subscribe to Co-creating Peace on your favorite podcast provider
• Send me your ideas for topics and guests or be a guest to talk about your communication or conflict resolution challenges and receive free communication coaching
• Share on social media & tell the world about Co-creating Peace! 
• Become a patron at www.patreon.com/CocreatingPeace

 Visit BridgesofPeace.com to learn more about Kathleen and her work.

Welcome to Part 2 of “Overcoming Division Through Curiosity, Compassion & Courage”, Episode #118 of Co-creating Peace, a series about conscious communication & conflict transformation. 

In Episode # 117, which aired May 28, Tom Fishman, CEO of Starts with Us shared some insights and tools for bridging divides, including how each of us can affect positive change and influence social norms simply by how we show up each and every day. He also discussed new ways of building towards common goals with online technologies. If you haven’t yet heard that episode, I encourage you to give it a listen.

This week, I continue my conversation with Tom. Highlights you won’t want to miss include:

• Seeking diverse perspectives in critical thinking 
• The importance of intentionality 
• The relationship between behavior and values  
• Balancing media consumption and coverage 
•  Starts With Us’ exciting plans for program expansion 

Tom Fishman, CEO of Starts with Us is wired to be in “build mode” and much prefers answering the “why?” and “how?” vs. “what?” He’s at SWU because he believes media and technology can be harnessed for good. Alongside so many of us, he is eager to give a home, a voice, and real momentum to all of the people who believe it’s time to end the culture wars and make curiosity, compassion, and courage the dominant values in our society. In his words, “If no one builds it, it won’t happen.”

Other organizations Tom mentioned in Part 1 that you may want to learn more about are:

• Braver Angels
•  Bridge USA
• All Sides Media

Please support Co-creating Peace:

• Subscribe to Co-creating Peace on your favorite podcast provider
• Send me your ideas for topics & guests or be a guest to talk about your communication or conflict resolution challenges & receive free communication coaching.
• Share on social media & tell the world about Co-creating Peace! 
• Become a patron at www.patreon.com/CocreatingPeace

Share your thoughts, reactions, feedback & ideas with me. I'd love to hear from you!

Please support Co-creating Peace:

• Subscribe to Co-creating Peace on your favorite podcast provider
• Send me your ideas for topics and guests or be a guest to talk about your communication or conflict resolution challenges and receive free communication coaching
• Share on social media & tell the world about Co-creating Peace! 
• Become a patron at www.patreon.com/CocreatingPeace

 Visit BridgesofPeace.com to learn more about Kathleen and her work.

In Episode # 112, which aired in mid-March, I introduced you to Starts With Us by inviting you to participate in their Finding the Way Out Challenge. I'm delighted to welcome Tom Fishman, CEO of Starts with Us to the show to tell us more about Starts with Us, and the wonderful work this organization is doing. Tom will also share some insights and tools for bridging divides.

Welcome to “Overcoming Division Through Curiosity, Compassion & Courage”.

Highlights you won’t want to miss include:

• Hyper-partisan politicians are covered in the news 4x more than bipartisan politicians.
• How each of us can affect positive change and influence social norms simply by how we show up each and every day. 
• New ways of building towards common goals with online technologies 
• How much greater perceived division seems vs what reality is

Tom Fishman, CEO of Starts with Us majored in physics in college, and brings from that world a unique ability to break down complex problems into simple units. In terms of leadership style, he is a big believer in emotional honesty (in addition to intellectual honesty, of course). Like so many, he left the for-profit world for social impact (Starts with Us) during the pandemic, and can speak to what this shift has taught him, both personally and professionally.

He is wired to be in “build mode” and much prefers answering the “why?” and “how?” vs. “what?” He’s at SWU because he believes media and technology can be harnessed for good. Alongside so many of us, he is eager to give a home, a voice, and real momentum to all of the people who believe it’s time to end the culture wars and make curiosity, compassion, and courage the dominant values in our society. In his words, “If no one builds it, it won’t happen.”

Join me again the weekend of June 10th when Tom and I will continue our conversation and delve into the ways collaboration, multi-partisan alliances, and seeking out different perspectives can overcome division and create lasting change. Learn how to model the three C's in digital spaces and conversations, and how to influence the media to focus on solutions-oriented leaders. Together, we'll explore the tools available to empower you to take action in your homes, schools, churches, and communities, and how your individual intentionality can lead to a more balanced media landscape, ultimately creating a brighter future for all. Don't miss this inspiring conversation about bridging divides and the potential of Starts with Us.

Other organizations Tom mentioned that you may want to learn more about are:

• Braver Angels
•  Bridge USA
• All Sides Media

Please support Co-creating Peace by:

• Becoming a patron at www.patreon.com/CocreatingPeace
• Subscribing to Co-creating Peace on your favorite podcast provider
• Send me your ideas for topics and guests, or be a guest
• Tell the world about Co-creating Peace!

Share your thoughts, reactions, feedback & ideas with me. I'd love to hear from you!

Please support Co-creating Peace:

• Subscribe to Co-creating Peace on your favorite podcast provider
• Send me your ideas for topics and guests or be a guest to talk about your communication or conflict resolution challenges and receive free communication coaching
• Share on social media & tell the world about Co-creating Peace! 
• Become a patron at www.patreon.com/CocreatingPeace

 Visit BridgesofPeace.com to learn more about Kathleen and her work.

I’ve spoken often on this show about how if we want to truly be heard, we have to help others feel safe hearing us. Today, I have the pleasure of speaking with Stephan Wiedner, a psychological safety expert. Stephan brings us deeper insights into the importance of psychological safety and the myriad of ways it can be used to foster peace and mutual understanding.

Welcome to "Psychological Safety, Peace & Human Understanding", Episode #116 of Co-creating Peace, a podcast about conscious communication and conflict transformation. 

Highlights you won’t want to miss include:

• Psychological Safety and its importance in team dynamics 
• Tools for fostering Psychological Safety (curiosity, open-ended questions, active listening) 
• Challenges in maintaining Psychological Safety 
• Empathy and self-referencing messages in creating Psychological Safety 

Stephan Wiedner is a psychological safety expert whose career has focused on developing sustainable high-performance leaders, teams, and organizations. His passion for unleashing the collective potential of people has led him to co-found Noomii.com, the web’s largest network of independent life coaches, Skillsetter.com, the deliberate practice platform for interpersonal skills, and Zarango.com, the psychological safety training experts. Stephan’s writing has been featured in Forbes, Entrepreneur, and other popular publications. 

Follow Stephan on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/swiedner/

Learn more about Stephan’s work with Psychological Safety at www.Zarango.com.

To receive a free psychological safety evaluation of your team, go to:  www.Zarango.com/freepsi. 

Check out Stephan’s other projects:

• Noomii.com – The Web's Largest Network of Professional Coaches, and
• Skillsetter.com, the deliberate practice platform for interpersonal skills.

Please support Co-creating Peace:

• Subscribe to Co-creating Peace on your favorite podcast provider
• Send me your ideas for topics & guests or be a guest to talk about your communication or conflict resolution challenges & receive free communication coaching.
• Share on social media & tell the world about Co-creating Peace! 
• Become a patron at www.patreon.com/CocreatingPeace

Share your thoughts, reactions, feedback & ideas with me. I'd love to hear from you!

Please support Co-creating Peace:

• Subscribe to Co-creating Peace on your favorite podcast provider
• Send me your ideas for topics and guests or be a guest to talk about your communication or conflict resolution challenges and receive free communication coaching
• Share on social media & tell the world about Co-creating Peace! 
• Become a patron at www.patreon.com/CocreatingPeace

 Visit BridgesofPeace.com to learn more about Kathleen and her work.

For centuries wise people have reminded us – or at least, tried to remind us – that it is much easier to co-create peace with others if we have peace within ourselves. One such person is my guest today, Jennifer Boyatt.

Welcome to “From Peace Within Comes Peace With Others”, Episode #115 of Co-creating Peace, a podcast about conscious communication & conflict transformation. 

Jennifer Boyatt is a creative, a healer, a visionary, and a peacemaker.  She is the founder and director of the High Desert Center for Peace in Albuquerque, New Mexico. She hosts the interview events, A Conversation with Leading Peacemakers, and Inner Peace Albuquerque which you can enjoy on YouTube. Jennifer writes, creates, and shares programs, writings, and videos that she hopes will bless the lives of others and help them to heal and to receive insight about living earth life with peace. Learn more about Jennifer and the wonderful work she is doing at: highdesertpeacecenter.org.

Highlights of our conversation include:

• Peace is something that happens in your body.
• The importance of self-authority when determining what role peace will have in your life. 
• Peace is holistic. Inner peace & interpersonal peace are inextricably intertwined.
•  How seeing every single person you meet as someone of worth and value to you promotes more peaceful interactions

As a reminder, Co-creating Peace now airs on the 2nd and 4th weekend of each month. I hope you’ll join me on May 13 for Episode #116 ­– “Psychological Safety, Peace, and Human Understanding” when I’ll be joined by Stephan Wiedner, a psychological safety expert. As important as psychological safety is to supporting our ability to co-create peace with others, you won’t want to miss this dynamic conversation and the wisdom Stephan will share!

Please support Co-creating Peace:

• Subscribe to Co-creating Peace on your favorite podcast provider
• Send me your ideas for topics & guests or be a guest to talk about your communication or conflict resolution challenges & receive free communication coaching.
• Share on social media & tell the world about Co-creating Peace! 
• Become a patron at www.patreon.com/CocreatingPeace

Share your thoughts, reactions, feedback & ideas with me. I'd love to hear from you!

Please support Co-creating Peace:

• Subscribe to Co-creating Peace on your favorite podcast provider
• Send me your ideas for topics and guests or be a guest to talk about your communication or conflict resolution challenges and receive free communication coaching
• Share on social media & tell the world about Co-creating Peace! 
• Become a patron at www.patreon.com/CocreatingPeace

 Visit BridgesofPeace.com to learn more about Kathleen and her work.