Confidently Uncomfortable

Have you been feeling self doubt lately? J.Go breaks down three times she's felt self doubt and what she did to overcome her doubts and fears.

* Connect with J.Go on E-Mail: [email protected]

* Become a Beta Tester for my Busy BCB Program: https://www.jgofitlife.com/offers/QJWV6cc9/checkout

- If you're interested on being a guest on this podcast, please fill out this form: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSfBeYYPBCUeIVFG1N0u0wBqYEMzLRvAYn8uBRMTkrwdEBoksw/viewform?usp=sf_link

- Sometimes, people only show their successes and don't show the whole picture, which was likely filled with a lot of self doubt. J.Go wants to be vulnerable and share times along her journey when she felt self doubt, and how she overcame those feelings to level up.

1. When J.Go quit her job without having a plan

- She thought: can I really do this on my own? These feelings came up over and over again during the course of her first year coaching.

- How did she work through the doubt?

- First of all, she was fortunate enough to have emotional support and encouragement from both of her parents

- She walked through the doubt, meaning: She thought about the fear, doubt, and anxiety she felt when the fear came up. She was so afraid of failure, but what would actually happen if she failed? She could always go back to a job.

- What if this isn't the "right" thing for her? Well, maybe it would open her eyes to new opportunities. Maybe she will meet someone who will lead her to her next step.

- Taking that next step is telling God or the Universe that you trust the plan, and that you trust yourself.

- The next step can be a small one, such as making yourself a short morning routine, setting a boundary, etc.

- Walking through self doubt helped her realize what could happen really wasn't that bad. Even if it was a trainwreck, it was better that she at least tried.

1. When J.Go hosted her first Go.Retreat

- She compared herself to a lot of people who have already hosted multiple retreats

- What did she do to help self doubt?

- Self Reflection: Look at a time in your life when you were afraid of something and it all worked out. When is a time when you doubted yourself, and you proved yourself wrong?

- Celebrate your achievements so far. They wouldn't have happened if you let self doubt get in the way.

- Instead of getting caught up in comparison, she decided to learn from them.

- She reached out asking for mentorship and it was invaluable.

- She thought to herself, why not you? Why not?

- If you don't want to reach out for mentorship, you can scroll back to their very first instagram post, or their first video or blog. It helps to see their growth and that everyone starts from the beginning.

1. Taking a social media break

- She had fears, "What if no one cares?". It was her ego talking.

- What if she can't run a successful business without Instagram?

- She realized that fear itself wasn't a good enough reason to stay on social media and continue going at the pace that she was.

- what if you can't run a successful business without posting on instagram everyday and sharing your life?

- The people that get it, the people who connect with her.

- She went back to what really matters, her values.

- What could she control? She could control how much she was on social media.

- Getting clear on her values was her first big step. Decide what matters to you. What do you value? What are your goals?

- If something could help you reach your goals, then do it!

- If you knew you wouldn't fail, would you do it? Then take that step.

- It's worth more to try and fail.

Do you listen to podcasts while you walk? In this episode, J.Go leads you through a guided walking meditation to help you step into your highest self. Are you ready? * Connect with J.Go on E-Mail: [email protected]

* If you're interested on being a guest on this podcast, please fill out this form: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSfBeYYPBCUeIVFG1N0u0wBqYEMzLRvAYn8uBRMTkrwdEBoksw/viewform?usp=sf_link

* FREE download 31 Journal Prompts to Cultivate Confidence: https://www.jgofitlife.com/freebies

* Forsyth Woman Leadership Conference Virtual Tickets: http://events.r20.constantcontact.com/register/event?oeidk=a07ej0tyx2fec694696&llr=pahcl4bab

* Discover your self love language quiz and join the FREE Go Love Yourself Challenge: https://www.jgofitlife.com/goloveyourself

* Affiliate Link for Epidemic Sound: https://www.epidemicsound.com/referral/vfdgx7

Epidemic Sound music used in this episode:

- Fragile Stevie by Jobii

- Celemation by Jobii

- Some Day Ago by Dylan Sitts

- Unbroken Spirit by Sunfish Grove

- Jakarta by Bonsaye

In this episode, J.Go shares why she's decided to take a break from social media, what that looks like for her, and what she's doing to prepare for her next chapter. Are you thinking about taking a break too? This episode is your invitation to slow down and re-align.

* Connect with J.Go on E-Mail: [email protected]

* FREE download 31 Journal Prompts to Cultivate Confidence

* Forsyth Woman Leadership Conference Virtual Tickets

* Discover your self love language quiz and join the FREE Go Love Yourself Challenge

- It's been almost four years since J.Go took a break from social media!

- Participating in her "self love challenge" helped her see she hasn't been taking time for herself to process her grandmother's passing.

- "The reason I wanted to talk about it for a week before I jumped off and took time off of social media was — I felt like there are other people out there who need a break as well. Who needs to slow down their brain and who needs to take a step away from all of this consumption and screen time."

- She was going through the motions and wasn't feeling present in her body. Not burnout - but numbness.

Ask yourself these questions:

- How are you feeling?

- What do you need right now?

- What would you do right now if you broke up with all the 'shoulds' going on in your head?

Preparation:

- She's auditing her current screen time

- Setting intentions for the next 90 days

- Taking a break, but not putting a number on it. Not a "cold turkey" approach

- Considering which new boundaries to set

- Brainstorming about what to share next

- Giving herself grace

Shifting focus:

- More focus on the podcast and speaking events

- If you're interested on being a guest on this podcast, please fill out this form

- "There might be something on the other side of letting go, but because you're so stuck in controlling what you have now and holding onto it, you're not releasing into what could be."

On your self love journey, sometimes you're the one getting in your way. How can we use our self love language to identify how we might be self sabotaging?

• Take my FREE Self Love Language Quiz: https://www.jgofitlife.com/selflovequiz
• Enroll to be in the beta group of Busy BCB:
• Connect with Jordan: @JGoFitLife https://www.instagram.com/jgofitlife
• Get on the waitlist for Body Confident Blueprint Coaching Program https://www.jgofitlife.com/bcb-waitlist

- As we continue to grow and level up, our saboteurs come back in different and new ways.

- Our love language, how we best receive love, can give insight into how we might self sabotage or punish ourselves.

If your Love Language is Words of Affirmation:

- Look out for negative self talk or an overactive "inner mean girl"

- To help combat it: Stop the words in their tracks. Shift towards positive self talk and bring attention to things you love about yourself.

- J.Go has a "wins wall" that she can look at when she's feeling down.

If your Love Language is Acts of Service:

- Look out for a messy home or environment, undone chores or tasks. You might not be taking care of yourself, planning ahead, taking on too much, letting your environment get unruly.

- To help combat it: Firstly, don't feel guilty or compare. Start small with a 15 minute timer and clean one corner with your favorite music playing. Be proud of what you got done in that time period; give yourself grace.

If your Love Language is Physical Touch:

- Look out for avoiding human interaction and feeling disconnected from ourselves and our friends. You might also be over-consuming content which leads to comparison.

- How you can combat it: Create a code with your closest people to let them know how you're feeling when you are isolating. Start small by taking steps to reconnect with your body.

If your Love Language is Gifts:

- Look out for not allowing yourself to treat yourself, or not feeling worthy of nice things. You may be putting yourself last and not thinking you deserve anything.

- How to combat it: Gifts don't have to be a physical purchase, they can also be an investment in yourself. Celebrate when you purchase something for yourself because you are worthy of nice things.

Where to start:

Audit your behaviors and habits to see if you are punishing yourself in any of these ways.

EXCITING ANNOUNCEMENT:

J.Go is launching a self paced version of her Body Confident Blueprint Program called "Busy BCB"

- Busy BCB is for women you maybe aren't ready to make such a big investment and just want the content, methods, and mindset to get started at their own pace. Busy BCB will include information on macros, flexible dieting without restriction, fitness goals, and mindset.

J.Go is looking for women who can beta test the program and give feedback at a massive discount.

They'll get 1-1 support and will get the final program after it is finalized and completed.

Enrollment for the beta program opens today! 2/22/22

A conversation about love with blogger and lifestyle influencer, Acacia Robinson!

• Discover your self love language quiz and join the FREE Go Love Yourself Challenge: https://www.jgofitlife.com/goloveyourself
• Connect with Jordan: @JGoFitLife https://www.instagram.com/jgofitlife
• Get on the waitlist for Body Confident Blueprint Coaching Program https://www.jgofitlife.com/bcb-waitlist
• Connect with Acacia at @Acacia.Robinson https://www.instagram.com/acacia.robinson/

Meet Acacia:

- Lifestyle blogger and influencer, played a HUGE part in helping J.Go plan the Go Retreat.

- She took J.Go's quiz to discover her self love language (https://www.jgofitlife.com/goloveyourself )

- Acacia's self love language is Acts of Service, while her love language is Quality Time.

Acts of Service examples:

- Take actions that will help your highest self

- Do something to alleviate some of the day's chaos

- Journal Prompt: If you walked in your house at the end of the day, what would light you up to see? What's something that would make you happy?

Acacia's Blog Series: Friend Friday

- The idea wasn't something she ever thought she would share.

- Once her daughter was out of the hospital - she wanted to share who she was reaching out to.

- She's done Friend Friday posts on grandparents, significant others, people we find undeserving, etc.

- She focuses on reflecting on current relationships and fostering them.

Acacia's Tips on Gift Giving:

- You can take a different perspective and take the pressure off

- See it as an opportunity to meet a need for someone.

- It doesn't need to be a physical or expensive gift, but an act of service or a nice note

- It doesn't need to be a holiday or big event, that adds a level of surprise to it.

- As a couple, take the pressure off of gifts and maybe do something charitable instead

- Experiences are also a good gift, like cooking classes

- The element of surprise will always win

- "Spread that kindness, spread that love.Cause we all need more of it." - Acacia

A conversation with Brooke Eagle, publisher of Forsyth Women Magazine.

Buy your online tickets to the Forsyth Woman's "Women on the Move" Leadership Conference http://events.r20.constantcontact.com/register/event?oeidk=a07ej0tyx2fec694696&llr=pahcl4bab&utm_campaign=later-linkinbio-forsythmags&utm_medium=social&utm_content=later-24199637&utm_source=linkin.bio

• Connect with Jordan: @JGoFitLife https://www.instagram.com/jgofitlife
• Learn more about J.Go's Body Confident Blueprint Coaching Program https://www.jgofitlife.com/bcb
• Connect with Brooke: Forsyth Mags Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/forsyth-magazines/id1493438188
• Instagram: @brooke__eagle https://www.instagram.com/brooke__eagle/
• Instagram: forsythmags https://www.instagram.com/forsythmags/
• J.Go's Self Love Language Quiz + Join the Challenge: https://www.jgofitlife.com/goloveyourself

Meet Brooke Eagle

• She went to High Point and got her degree in Elementary Education. She realized it wasn't her passion while she was student teaching.
• Her mom founded Forsyth Women Magazine 16 years ago.
• She started working for her mom as an ad salesman, working on commission.
• She had a lot of doubt, fear, and worry about how much money she'd "wasted" on her education. Now, she can see that it wasn't a waste of money and that she learned a lot.
• It's OK to grow, and to grow out of a position. It doesn't mean that the time wasn't well-spent because it's a time you were growing and learning. She found the positives.
• Stepping away from what you're comfortable with is a great first step, and sometimes the scariest thing to do

She's hosting the "Women on the Move" leadership conference this Spring. It'll be a day of growth, learning, networking, fun and supporting local people.

What's her advice to someone who's struggling to step into the opportunity?

- You don't want to wait too long, especially when it comes to personal development.

- If you've been thinking about self development but afraid to get yourself out there, network. You can't build relationships without putting yourself out there.

- Will your future self thank you for this? If the answer is yes, don't wait for it.

A lot of listeners are busy, driven women. What does Brooke do to create balance?

- Exercise is her non-negotiable.

- Listen to your body. It's not intense all the time, sometimes it's stretching, walking your dog, or a twenty minute power nap.

J.Go's Self Love Language Quiz:

- If you can't find your self love, it's hard to receive it from others.

- Physical Touch: Massages, soft blankets, moving your body, napping, skincare, showers, bath.

- How do you give words of affirmation to yourself? Positive self talk, finding gratitude, daily affirmations, journaling, self improvement, investing in yourself, surrounding yourself with community that lifts you up.

In this episode, J.Go shares why she’s decided to take a break from social media, what that looks like for her, and what she’s doing to prepare for her next chapter. Are you thinking about taking a break too? This episode is your invitation to slow down and re-align. 

 

* Connect with J.Go on E-Mail: [email protected] 

* FREE download 31 Journal Prompts to Cultivate Confidence

* Forsyth Woman Leadership Conference Virtual Tickets

* Discover your self love language quiz and join the FREE Go Love Yourself Challenge

 

- It’s been almost four years since J.Go took a break from social media!

- Participating in her “self love challenge” helped her see she hasn’t been taking time for herself to process her grandmother’s passing. 

-  “The reason I wanted to talk about it for a week before I jumped off and took time off of social media was — I felt like there are other people out there who need a break as well. Who needs to slow down their brain and who needs to take a step away from all of this consumption and screen time.”

- She was going through the motions and wasn’t feeling present in her body. Not burnout - but numbness. 

 

Ask yourself these questions: 

- How are you feeling?

- What do you need right now? 

- What would you do right now if you broke up with all the ‘shoulds’ going on in your head?

 

Preparation:

- She’s auditing her current screen time

- Setting intentions for the next 90 days

- Taking a break, but not putting a number on it. Not a “cold turkey” approach

- Considering which new boundaries to set

- Brainstorming about what to share next

- Giving herself grace

 

Shifting focus:

- More focus on the podcast and speaking events

- If you’re interested on being a guest on this podcast, please fill out this form

- “There might be something on the other side of letting go, but because you‘re so stuck in controlling what you have now and holding onto it, you’re not releasing into what could be.”

What happens if you don't practice self love in a relationship? J.Go breaks down 6 common scenarios and how to show up better for your partner and yourself.

• Take the Self Help Quiz + Sign up for J.Go's FREE Self Love Challenge starting on February 14th: https://www.jgofitlife.com/goloveyourself
• Connect with Jordan: @JGoFitLife
• Learn more about J.Go's signature 12-week Body Confident Blueprint Program: https://www.jgofitlife.com/bcb

This episode doesn't only apply to romantic relationships: friendships, work relationships, and family relationships are also important places to practice self love.

**If you are in an unhealthy relationship or unsafe relationship - reach out to appropriate help or counselors.

1. Codependency:

- These come with high self sacrifice and the feeling that you're losing yourself. You may start to resent the relationship.

- What to do: Focus on your needs first, be clear on your value, have independent interests and activities outside of that partner. Communicate these needs.

- Make some time for yourself and find an activity that you can do on your own

- If your partner is pushing back on you having some personal time, that's a red flag.

1. Gas Lighting:

- If you find yourself questioning your sanity, surround yourself with people that know you. They're going to be honest and level with you, and help you get a better grip on reality.

- Sometimes there's guilt, but know you are worthy of feeling grounded in who you are.

- Be grounded in your truth.

- If someone makes you question yourself, see if it's coming from a genuine and loving space, or if it's a form of manipulation and control.

1. Lack of Boundaries:

- If you're feeling spread thin, most likely you're not sticking to your boundaries.

- Ask yourself: What do I want to say 'yes' more of to?

- Example: Going outside more, visiting more friends

- What do you want to say 'no' to?

- What are some boundaries you need? With your partner? With work? With family?

1. Projecting Insecurities:

- When J.Go and Tom were younger, she would look for affirmation from him all the time.

- She'd ask "Why are you making me feel this way?" -- mirroring how she was feeling on the inside back at him.

- If you're projecting insecurities, it's important to ask: What are you feeling insecure about? It might not have anything to do with your partner, but maybe a past relationship that's seeping into your current relationship.

- Communicate the insecurities to your partner. Think of action points that they can do that will help you.

- Start with affirming yourself, that way you'll be more open to receiving love.

- Give yourself praise and affirmation

- Be your biggest hype women

- Refocus on what matters

1. Miscommunication

- When miscommunication is coming up - you can take some time with yourself and identity what matters, what you're valuing, and getting more clear on what you really want to communicate

- Emotions can get up and take over. They're not bad, but practice communicating them. Ask yourself why you're feeling that way and put it into words to help someone else understand.

- Be open to what the other person is saying without jumping to conclusions or feeling judged. Sometimes we'll get back to projecting emotions, we start to self blame and judge.

- In an argument, understand how each partner works

- Identify the disconnect. Take time to see things from other people's perspectives, from a judgment-free space. This may require exiting the situation.

- Go on a walk together or alone.

1. Shitty Sex

- Emotional intimacy is crucial for a long-term sustainable sex life.

- Self love perspective: you've got to reconnect with your own body.

- Lots of examples in the "reconnecting with your body" episode https://jgofitlife.libsyn.com/reconnect-with-your-body-part-1-nurture-nature-naked

- Communicate your needs

- Explore intimacy and trying new things, it's about baby steps

- Quality time that is uninterrupted talk. No phones. No screens during dinner.

- Put something on the calendar for spending time together without screens

How do I know what I need in my self care practice to show myself love?

- Self care has to do with your self love language.

- J.Go has a quiz called The 5 Self Love Language: https://www.jgofitlife.com/selflovequiz

- Go Love Yourself 5 Day Challenge

- Help you unlock your love language and find a deeper connection with yourself.

- Starts on Valentines Day

- A couple's challenge also

- Launching now - sign up, get the introduction email and take the quiz.

https://www.jgofitlife.com/goloveyourself

A conversation with BCB Babe, Amy Fabriziani about her experience during the signature Body Confident Blueprint program. *BCB Opens soon, be sure to get on the waitlist (link below). If you have any questions DM @jgofitlife

• Connect with Jordan: @JGoFitLife https://www.instagram.com/jgofitlife
• Get on the waitlist for 2022 Body Confident Blueprint Coaching Program https://www.jgofitlife.com/bcb-waitlist
• Connect with Amy: @amyfab5 https://www.instagram.com/amyfab5
• Learn more about BCB: https://www.jgofitlife.com/bcb

Meet Amy:

- From Dover PA, now living in NC

- Majored in elementary and special education

- Married 16 years, 3 kids, lots of animals

- She's always struggled with childhood trauma and feeling confident in her skin

- As a gymnast, cheerleader and dancer, there was a lot of focus on her body growing up

What made Amy decide to join the BCB program?

- After having 3 kids and getting burnt out on diet programs, she was ready for something new

- She wanted to look like she did in college, but realized that person was a wreck mentally

- After taking to J.Go, she realized her metabolism needed to be fixed

- She knew the weight loss industry is all about money and she'd never get a personal experience

- She had her personal training certification, but hadn't been able to get through to herself yet

The jumping off point of BCB is the Discovery Call. How did that go for Amy?

- She felt understood, and knew J.Go could help her

- Amy felt excited after the call and felt like she found what she needed to do

- Amy was super open at the Discovery Call and encourages everyone to be the same

What was her Experience in the BCB Community:

- it felt individual and personalized, and she also loved the small groups and larger group

- She struggled with thinking past surface-level goals. Things changed when she discovered her "why"

- During the kickoff call, she felt super connected to all the girls and loved that they were all in the same boat, everyone was a cheerleader.

- She enjoyed working on her bedtime routine - it was trial and error and J.Go encouraged her to listen to her body and find what worked for her

- She used to wake up feeling already behind, but now she knows she's where she's supposed to be

- As a recovering people pleaser, she's learned to set boundaries

What would Amy say to a mom who might think investing in herself is selfish?

- When Amy was younger, her grandma would say she has to make time for herself and she brushed it off

- If she would have taken the time and had ladies to support her, things might have looked different.

- "It's hard to trust that this is something that will help you be a better woman, wife, person, and mom. It's not that you're taking time away from them, you become more present with them."

- She's a better mom now, she's not running herself ragged.

- Her self care attitude has had an impact on her kids as well, they're starting to approach their days differently and communicate what they need

How did this impact her self confidence?

- She's learned to not be so impacted by others and give herself grace for saying "no". "If it doesn't light you up, don't feel guilty about saying no."

- She used to be consumed with negative self-talk, and now she's able to calm down her inner mean girl.

What did she think when J.Go wanted her to be a co-cost?

- She knows she can help other women, be their cheerleaders and teach them through her experiences.

- "even when times are shitty, you can still live and not feel guilty about it and do what you need to do. If it's the bare minimum somedays, that is OK."

What would you say to someone who's on the fence about BCB?

- Just if you get on the Discovery Call doesn't mean you're locked in or stuck. Do it!

To follow along , use the link below to sign up for her FREE New Year Clear Vision Challenge to get access to the workbook, video lessons and other resources. In this episode, J.Go will teach us how to reverse engineer our goals.

• Join us at the Vision Board Party: https://www.jgofitlife.com/offers/77LJrRsU/checkout
• Start 2022 FOR YOU free 3-day New Year Clear Vision challenge sign-up: https://www.jgofitlife.com/start-2022-for-you
• Connect with Jordan: @JGoFitLife
• Get on the waitlist for 2022 Body Confident Blueprint Coaching Program https://www.jgofitlife.com/bcb-waitlist

- Goal for today: Have that first step of "what can I do now"

- Take big scary goals and break them down into bite sized chunks.

- Think about what you need to do initially that will get you closer to the big goal.

- Don't think about how far away the ultimate goal feels. Stay focused on the present and the day to day, you're going to get to your goal no matter what because you trusted yourself and made a path that will get you there.

- Focus on the good energy and excitement around reaching that goal. Your brain won't have enough time to worry about it.

- Vision Board Party January 16, 8 PM EST, Zoom

- $22 includes access to the vision board party (live or recorded) and a 20 minute coaching call with J.Go to go over your vision for 2022, goal setting, and any other questions you have.

- You'll ALSO get exclusive pricing to BCB $300 off the enrollment fees

- Sign up here: https://www.jgofitlife.com/offers/77LJrRsU/checkout