Connectedness

Are the expectations you're carrying into dating helping you find love — or quietly blocking it?In this episode of the Connectedness Podcast, I sit down with Amy Schoen, a certified professional life coach and ICF PCC-credentialed relationship coach who has spent 20 years helping marriage-minded singles find lasting, committed love. And yes, she's been in those shoes herself. Divorced in her mid-30s, Amy hired a coach, did the inner work, and met her husband at 42. They've been married 24 years and are still going strong.We talk about something that doesn't get enough airtime in the dating conversation: the expectations we carry without even realizing them, and how they shape every connection we make.In this episode, we cover:The most common expectations Amy sees singles bring into dating (pacing, finances, time, family, and more)- How to tell the difference between healthy standards and rigid dealbreakers- The "must haves vs. would like to haves" exercise that helps her clients get clear fast- Why her clients tend to reach exclusivity within just 3–6 dates- What separates the singles who find great relationships from the ones who stay stuck- How to navigate online dating without losing hope (yes, the good ones are out there)- Why the real relationship work begins after you find the personWhether you're newly single, back in the dating world after a long relationship, or just feeling like something isn't clicking, this conversation will leave you feeling more grounded, more hopeful, and a lot more self-aware.Connect with Amy Schoen:🌐 motivatedtomarry.com▶️ YouTube: Relationship Coach Amy ShonneConnect with Fernanda & Filled Cups:🌐 filledcups.com📸 Instagram: @filled.cupsIf this episode resonated with you, share it with a friend who might need to hear it. Like, subscribe, and until next time — stay connected to yourself and others, and keep filling your cup. 💜#DatingAdvice #RelationshipCoach #DatingExpectations #SingleLife #FindingLove #ConnectednessPodcast #FilledCups #MarriageMinded #DatingMindset #SelfAwareness #LoveAfter40 #HealthyRelationships #ModernDating #SingleWomen #DatingCoach

In this episode of The Connectedness Podcast, we sit down with Rita, founder of Simple Self-Care, to explore the powerful connection between self-care, stress management, mental health, and healthy relationships.After facing overwhelming stress, burnout, and thoughts of hopelessness while navigating the challenges of motherhood, Rita discovered that true self-care isn't about indulgence—it's about self-preservation.Together, we discuss:✅ Why self-care is NOT selfish✅ The hidden signs of stress overload and burnout✅ How stress impacts marriages, friendships, parenting, and community✅ Why you can't pour from an empty cup✅ Simple daily habits to reduce overwhelm and improve well-being✅ Journaling, movement, mindfulness, and practical stress relief techniques✅ The role of connectedness and community in healing and resilience✅ How to know when it's time to ask for helpIf you've been feeling exhausted, overwhelmed, disconnected, or stuck in survival mode, this conversation offers practical tools and hope for finding your way back to yourself.🌐 Learn more about Rita and Simple Self-Care:https://simpleselfcare.net📱 Join Rita's FREE Self-Care Text Club:https://simpleselfcare.activehosted.com/f/29Every Tuesday you'll receive a simple self-care mission designed to help you reduce stress and take better care of yourself—one small step at a time.🎧 Enjoyed this episode?Like, subscribe, and share it with someone whose cup may need refilling.#SelfCare #BurnoutRecovery #MentalHealth #StressManagement #Relationships #PersonalGrowth #Mindfulness #Wellness #Connectedness #Podcast

Have you ever looked around at your life and thought:"Everything is fine... so why doesn't it feel right?"In this episode of Connectedness, Fernanda sits down with life coach and founder of Uncompromised, Elinor Miller, for a powerful conversation about self-trust, people pleasing, boundaries, personal growth, and what happens when you've outgrown the life you've worked so hard to build.Elinor shares her own journey from feeling stuck in a life that looked successful on paper to helping women reconnect with themselves, stop abandoning their needs, and create lives that feel deeply aligned and authentic.In this conversation, we discuss:✓ Why high-achieving women often lose trust in themselves✓ The hidden danger of living a life that's "not bad"✓ How people pleasing disconnects us from who we really are✓ The difference between self-sacrifice and genuine kindness✓ Why wanting more doesn't make you ungrateful✓ Reparenting yourself and healing your inner child✓ How to stop seeking permission from others✓ Boundaries, relationships, and self-worth✓ Signs you've become disconnected from yourself✓ How to make major life decisions with confidence✓ The question that can change everything: Are you running toward something or away from something?One of the most powerful takeaways from this episode:"If you ever have to choose between disappointing yourself and disappointing someone else, your responsibility is to disappoint the other person."Whether you're navigating a career transition, relationship challenges, people-pleasing tendencies, or simply feeling called toward something more, this conversation offers practical wisdom and deep encouragement.Connect with Elinor Miller:Instagram: @elinormillerlifecoachWebsite: https://www.elinormillerco.com/Subscribe to Connectedness for conversations about personal growth, relationships, friendship, dating, emotional wellness, and living authentically.#SelfTrust #PersonalGrowth #PeoplePleasing #Boundaries #WomenEmpowerment #SelfWorth #Relationships #Confidence #Healing #LifeCoach #InnerChildHealing #ConnectednessPodcast #PersonalDevelopment #Mindset #AuthenticLiving

What if caring for a plant could help you care for yourself too?In this heartfelt episode of Connectedness, Fernanda sits down with Veronica Leon, founder of Verde Tribe, plant coach, community builder, and creator of the wildly popular Plant Bingo events in Charlotte. Together, they explore the deeper emotional connection between plants, mindfulness, wellness, and personal growth.Veronica shares how growing up in Ecuador and watching her grandmother lovingly care for plants inspired her journey into entrepreneurship and plant wellness. From moving abroad to Spain to building Verde Tribe into a thriving community-centered business, this conversation is full of wisdom about slowing down, trusting yourself, and creating intentional routines that support mental health.You’ll also learn:🌿 Why plants can reduce stress and improve creativity🌿 How plant care reflects our emotional well-being🌿 Tips for beginner plant parents🌿 Common plant myths (including why you should NOT water orchids with ice cubes!)🌿 The story behind Charlotte’s favorite community event: Plant Bingo🌿 How Veronica uses plants to create mindfulness and connectionWhether you’re a plant lover, entrepreneur, or simply looking for ways to feel more grounded in everyday life, this episode will leave you inspired to nurture both your space and yourself.✨ Connect with Veronica / Verde Tribe:Instagram & TikTok: @verdetribeWebsite: https://verdetribe.com✨ Follow Connectedness:Hosted by Fernanda, founder of Filled CupsNew conversations about growth, connection, authenticity, and wellness every week.

What if the secret to better communication, stronger relationships, and more confidence isn’t perfection… but play?In this episode of Connectedness, Fernanda sits down with Dayna Gowan: speaker, improviser, Distinguished Toastmaster, workshop facilitator, and host of the Improvly Speaking Podcast. They explore how improvisation can transform the way we communicate, connect, and show up in everyday life.Dayna shares how improv helped her overcome fear, embrace uncertainty, become a more confident speaker, and develop deeper human connections. Together, Fernanda and Dayna dive into the powerful improv principle of “Yes, And," how listening is a communication superpower, why adults lose touch with playfulness, and how creativity can improve relationships, parenting, leadership, and mental well-being.This conversation is filled with practical insights, vulnerable stories, laughter, and mindset shifts that can help anyone become a more authentic communicator and more connected human being.✨ In this episode, we discuss:-How improv builds confidence and reduces self-judgment- The “Yes, And” mindset for relationships and personal growth- Why active listening matters more than having the perfect response- How improv improves communication skills and social confidence- The connection between creativity, play, and emotional well-being- Why brainstorming often fails in corporate environments- Parenting, public speaking, and handling uncertainty through improv- Finding joy and humor in everyday life- How improv creates instant human connection🎧 About Dayna Gowan:Dayna is the founder of Improvly Speaking, where she helps individuals and organizations use improvisation skills to improve communication, leadership, creativity, and confidence. She also hosts the Improvly Speaking podcast and offers workshops, coaching, and corporate training.🔗 Connect with Dayna:Website: https://www.improvlyspeaking.comLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/daynagowanPodcast: Improv Speaking on Spotify & Apple Podcasts💛 If you enjoyed this episode, please like, subscribe, and share it with someone who could use a little more joy, confidence, and connection in their life.Learn about the power of Improv to change your life!

What happens when the life you built no longer feels aligned with who you are?In this episode of Connectedness, Fernanda sits down with Paula Lesso, divorce coach, speaker, and advocate for women navigating major life transitions. Together, they explore the emotional reality of divorce, identity shifts, healing, self-trust, and how women can move from surviving to truly thriving.Paula shares her personal story of going from being a “comfortable” people-pleaser in marriage to rediscovering herself after divorce—and how that journey inspired her work helping women through every stage of the divorce process.Whether you’re questioning your relationship, currently going through a divorce, healing after one, or supporting someone who is, this conversation offers compassion, clarity, and hope.In this episode, we discuss:- The emotional stages of divorce- Rebuilding your identity after separation- Why so many women lose themselves in relationships- The role of mindset and movement in healing- Learning to trust yourself again- Navigating uncertainty and major life transitions- Creating a fulfilling life after divorce- Finding connection and support through difficult seasonsIf this episode resonates with you, please like, comment, and subscribe to Connectedness for more conversations about growth, authenticity, healing, and human connection.Show Notes & Resources🌿 Connect with Paula Lesso:https://paulalesso.com/🌿 Second Saturday Charlotte (mentioned in this episode):https://www.secondsaturdaycharlotte.com/🌿 Connect with Fernanda & Filled Cups:https://www.filledcups.com

Friendships don’t always end with conflict — sometimes, they simply fade. But what if they’re not actually over?

In this episode of Connectedness, we explore the idea that many friendships aren’t lost… they’re just unmaintained. Building on the concept of “ambient distance,” we shift the focus from why relationships drift to how we can repair, revive, and sustain meaningful connections.

We talk about the small, intentional actions that keep friendships alive, why reaching out can feel harder than it should, and how different people — especially across gender lines — approach maintaining relationships in different ways.

If you’ve ever thought about someone you “used to talk to” and wondered if it’s too late… this episode is for you.

✨ In this episode, we cover:

• Why friendships fade without conflict
• What “ambient distance” really means
• How to revive a friendship that feels distant
• Simple, practical ways to maintain connection
• Gender differences in emotional connection and friendship styles
• Letting go of perfection when reconnecting

💭 Reflection questions:

• Who in your life feels “paused” rather than finished?
• What’s one small way you can reconnect this week?

If this resonated, consider sharing it with someone you’d love to reconnect with 🤍

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🔔 Subscribe for more conversations on self-trust, emotional growth, and meaningful connection.

#Friendship #Connection #PersonalGrowth #EmotionalWellbeing #Loneliness #Relationships #SelfGrowth #MentalHealth #Authenticity #SocialConnection

In this episode of Connectedness, Fernanda sits down with health coach Sylvie Brockman to explore the powerful connection between gut health, perimenopause, and menopause. And how supporting your body during this transition can help you feel more energized, balanced, and fulfilled.If you’ve been struggling with bloating, brain fog, low energy, mood swings, or hormonal changes, this conversation will help you understand what’s really happening inside your body—and what you can do about it.Sylvie shares her personal journey of healing her gut and reclaiming her energy, along with practical, approachable tips to help you support your own health. Together, we explore how gut health impacts hormones, mood, digestion, and overall well-being, and why this stage of life can actually be an opportunity for deeper connection with yourself.In this episode, we cover:* What gut health really means (and why it matters more than you think)* The link between **gut health and menopause symptoms*** How hormones affect digestion during perimenopause* The gut-brain connection and its impact on mood and mental clarity* Simple daily habits to improve gut health naturally* How to feel more energized, confident, and connected in your body* What health coaching looks like and how Sylvie supports women 40+Whether you’re entering perimenopause, in the middle of menopause, or simply want to feel better in your body, this episode will leave you feeling informed, empowered, and supported.Connect with Sylvie Brockman:Website: https://www.sylviebrockman.comInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/holisticsylvie/Her next event on May 7 https://www.eventbrite.com/e/nourish-restore-a-wellness-event-for-women-tickets-1986920803610?📌 Don’t forget to:Like 👍Subscribe 🔔Share this episode with someone who might need it#GutHealth #Menopause #Perimenopause #HormoneHealth #WomensHealth #HolisticHealth #HealthyGut #WellnessPodcast #ConnectednessPodcast #SelfCare #HormoneBalance #PodcastForWomen

Are you pouring energy into friendships that leave you feeling drained, obligated, or quietly lonely — even when your life looks full from the outside? You're not alone. In this episode of the Connectedness Podcast, we're doing something most people have never done: mapping their entire social ecosystem with intention. Inspired by evolutionary psychologist Robin Dunbar's groundbreaking research on how humans actually organize their relationships, we explore the concept of friendship circles — and why understanding which ring your friends live in can completely change how you show up for them (and for yourself).

In this episode we cover:✔ Robin Dunbar's circles of connection — and what they mean for your friendships today✔ Why the "best friend" label might be doing you more harm than good✔ The difference between a friendship that needs tending vs. one that has run its course✔ How to know if your energy is going to the right places✔ What reciprocity actually looks like in adult friendships✔ A simple exercise to map your own social ecosystem

This is not about cutting people off. It's about getting clear — so you can invest your heart in the right places and finally stop feeling guilty about the rest.

Referenced in this episode:📖 Friends — Robin Dunbar📖 Friendships Don't Just Happen! — Shasta Nelson 📖 Platonic — Dr. Marisa Franco🌐 We Should Get Together — Kat Vellos (weshouldgettogether.com)——————————————————————————————🌸 ABOUT FILLED CUPS & THE CONNECTEDNESS PODCASTFilled Cups is a community and connections brand based in Charlotte, NC, dedicated to helping people build meaningful friendships, find their people, and show up authentically in their relationships.The Connectedness Podcast drops bi-weekly and explores what it really means to grow, connect, and trust yourself — in friendship, community, and beyond.

Hosted by Fernanda Brasileiro — people development consultant, community builder, and founder of Filled Cups.——————————————————————————————📲 CONNECT WITH USInstagram: @filledcupsTikTok: @filledcupsWebsite: [your website]——————————————————————————————⏱ TIMESTAMPS0:00 – Introduction0:50 – What the friendship audit actually is (hint: not a purge)2:00 – Robin Dunbar's circles of connection explained4:30 – Why your circles shift over time — and why that's okay6:30 – Where is your energy actually going?9:00 – Needs tending vs. run its course11:30 – How to use this going forward13:30 – Closing reflection & questions to sit with——————————————————————————————#friendship #adultfriendships #loneliness #personalgrowth #friendshipadvice #connections #selfawareness #filledcups #connectednesspodc #robindunbar #meaningfulrelationships

In this episode of Connectedness, we explore social anxiety—what it really is, where it comes from, and how to begin overcoming it.

Joined by psychotherapist Danielle Frouws https://daniellefrouws.com/, we break down the difference between shyness and social anxiety, why so many people struggle with fear of judgment, and what’s actually happening in your mind and body during anxious social moments.

Danielle also shares both professional insight and personal experience with social anxiety, offering practical tools you can start using right away—from grounding techniques and mindset shifts to exposure-based strategies that help you build confidence over time.

If you’ve ever overthought a conversation, avoided social situations, or felt like social anxiety is just “who you are,” this episode will help you understand that change is possible—and give you a path forward.

• What social anxiety actually is (and how it’s different from shyness)

• Why fear of judgment feels so intense

• Common thought patterns and physical symptoms

• How avoidance makes anxiety worse over time

• Practical tools to manage anxiety in the moment

• How to gradually build confidence through exposure

• Why social anxiety doesn’t have to define you

Whether your anxiety is mild or more intense, this conversation is designed to leave you feeling empowered, understood, and less alone.

🎧 Listen now and take the first step toward feeling more confident and connected.

#SocialAnxiety #MentalHealth #SelfGrowth #AnxietyHelp #Therapy #Confidence #ConnectednessPodcast