MAGA made the world hate the USA and destroyed our allies’ trust in us. Racist orc Trumpkin Tom Homan blathered drivel about ignoring judges and laws. A French legislator ripped the U.S. a new one and demanded we return the Statue of Liberty. House Democrats yelled at the Repubs for shielding Elmo from testifying about the imminent dismantling of social security. Useless minority Senate leader Schumer canceled a book tour. The pop group Semisonic condemned the White House of the use of their song Closing Time. The astronauts stuck in the space station finally made it back to Earth. Turncoat Gavin Newsom can eat rocks according to most libs. Creep Elon stopped shipping his ugly Cyber Trucks since they’re falling apart like his rockets. Sloth-like POTUS Trump caterwauled  lies about Biden’s pardons for the January 6th committee. The Crabs reviewed the recent Florida Man Games which incorporated alligators and other unsurprising elements.