Trump makes the US more of a global villian by spying on Greenland. The Nazis in The White House promised to slash Medicaid. The newly elected Canadian PM visited Pennsylvania avenue and moderately stood up to Shitler but not really. India lobbed missiles at Pakistan. The dictator-in-diapers pitted Little Marco and fascist Vance against each other in a 2028 match-up. Anti-Semitic hag Laura Loomer convinced President Tiny Hands to drop his Surgeon General nominee. MAGAT influencers were upset because a Repub Senator suggested migrants should get due process before deportation. The Young Turks, who did their part to put Donald Trump back in the White House, have collaborated on a project with vile fascist Marjorie Taylor Greene. Speaking of monster Greene, Democratic Rep Jasmine Crockett used Mama Nazi to demonstrate the crappiness of the Trump administration during a hearing. The press continued to gobble up White House propaganda which suggests Donald Trump will leave after his term is up.

Texas GOP idiots want to ban non-existent furry litterboxes in schools. Planes have been falling out of the sky at Newark Airport because MAGA! Shitler ended programs to reduce sudden infant death syndrome. Sith Lord Marjorie Taylor Greene and blotch Nazi Bannon complained about the felon POTUS conducting foreign wars. Demon Greene’s former hubby was sued and forced to publicly apologize for harassing Muslim women in a mall parking lot. Texans voted out a conservative school board for banning books. Empty headed Michelle Bachman blathered Dems have a dictatorship mentality. FBI Czar Kash Patel has been partying at nightclubs and not showing up to work. Feeble-minded Anaconda star Jon Voight has a Trump-endorsed plan to save Hollywood. The pile of hyena squirt known as Brian Kemp announced a run for Georgia senate. Sandy Hook conspiracy theorist Alex Jones and the hate-caster with the worst haircut Nick Fuentes shared time on a podcast caterwauling.

The DOGE creeps want all of our private data. The “Trump effect” caused conservatives to lose bigly in Australia. Man-baby’s tariffs have left some store shelves empty and have started to knee-cap the economy. Supreme Ketanji Brown Jackson shamed Shitler for his attacks on judges. My Pillow Czar Mike Lindell has been selling sheets from the White House front yard. Crappy Florida GOP legislators and Governor Pudding Fingers couldn’t pass a budget for Florida. The James Webb telescope found a planet covered in water inhabited by the most wee shrimp. A great white lived to feast another day, because of the efforts of a father and son. Jesus has nothing on savior Tim Frieden who sacrificed his own body to create a universal snake bite anti-venom.

Bad poll numbers make felon Trump cry like a baby. Man-baby whined about Amazon posting prices with the tariffs broken out. Trump’s economy sucks so bad even more people are putting groceries on credit. Apartheid Elmo, aka Elon Musk got in a shouting match with Trumpkin Scott Bessent. Mike Lindell’s lawyer was called out for citing case law created by A.I. The conservative in Canada lost because of Trump. Shitler pardoned a MAGAT politician convicted of stealing monies from a charity for a dead law enforcement officer. A piggy went on Stew Peters’ hate-cast to lobby for the pardon of a fellow officer busted for conspiracy, fraud, and bribery. The Czar of Florida, Ron DeSantis and “Karen” wife Casey hoped for a political dynasty in the gun-shine state but the dumb Nazi duo screwed it up. 

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Wannabe dictator Trump is basically saying “Let them eat cake” as tariffs rip our economy a new one! Russian State T.V. celebrated Shitler ruining the trust the world had in U.S. economy. The security detail for Secretary of State Rubio brawled in Brussels. Man-baby wants a big military parade on his birthday and surely the second string former FOX morning news host, our current Sec Def, will oblige. The oligarchs of the U.S. will ultimately regret selling us out. The Hands-off protests took place all over America including the Crab’s hometown, Pensacola. The Dodgers, the current MLB champs, kissed the ring of Shitler at the White House while the orange fascist mumbled mouth garbage. Yet another right wing, Repub was indicted on child sexual abuse charges. A judge appointed by the POTUS most famous for working with an actual primate, waddled over to the correct side of history. Maybe the judge’s orders will be followed by the Trump Administration, but most likely not!