Crude

CRUDE #39

Misty and Frank in Berlin are joined by Effie in London to finally dive deep into how they each define kink and fetish, what these concepts mean to them personally, and how they shape their relationships, identities, and everyday lives. In this episode, the trio explores the differences and overlaps between kink culture, fetish culture, latex, and sexual expression, sharing real-life experiences, misconceptions they’ve encountered, and the evolution of their own desires.

They talk about the role of consent, communication, boundaries, power dynamics, and negotiation within kink; how specific fetishes develop; and why self-acceptance is key in any alternative sexuality journey. The conversation also touches on how many people turn to sex workers to explore their kinks and fetishes.

*What we were consuming*

[Book] Anastasiia Federova, Second Skin: Inside the Worlds of Fetish, Kink and Deviant Desire (2025)

[Book] Justin Lehmiller, The Psychology of Human Sexuality (2014)

[Definition] Paraphilia – a condition characterized by unusual sexual desires, typically involving extreme or dangerous activities.

[Wikipedia] Jessica Rabbit

[Fetish] "objectophile" or "objectum sexual": An individual who experiences romantic or sexual feelings towards inanimate objects.

[Book] Emily Nagoski , Come as You Are (2015)

CRUDE # 38

Frank in Berlin and Effie in London sit down with filmmakers Sam and Ed from altSHIFT Films to explore the world of ethical and feminist porn, creative freedom, and the evolving landscape of adult media.

Recorded during the Berlin Porn Film Festival, this episode dives into how ethical adult filmmaking challenges traditional narratives and the stigma that often surrounds the industry.

Sam and Ed — longtime creators and industry professionals — share insights from their latest movie Blowie, and open up about how they approach filmmaking with integrity, consent, and artistry.

In this episode, we discuss:

What defines ethical porn?

The role of performers, directors, and producers on set

The realities of filming — from consent practices to creative storytelling

Is impact play and similar content automatically unethical?

Why the Berlin Porn Film Festival is a key space for sex-positive cinema and artistic expression

Join the CRUDIES as they unpack questions about ethics, representation, and the art behind adult filmmaking.

altSHIFT film

"A couple of queers making cinematic filth"

twitter.com/altshiftxxx

instagram.com/xxaltshiftxx  

*What we were consuming*

[Film] Blowie

[Festival] Berlin Porn Film Festival

[Data on female kinks] Aella

[Wiki] Prince Andrew and the Epstein Scandal

[Film] The Antichrist, 2009 (Lars von Trier)

CRUDE # 37

Misty and Frank in Berlin are joined by Effie in London to chat with special guest Lucy Banks in Perth, Australia to talk about her incredible life journey from corporate banking to a successful career on OnlyFans and the challenges this brought to her as a mother – from aggressive mothers at school to problems within her friend circles.

Lucy Banks is the founder of Million Billion Media, a global PR and marketing agency helping adult creators and spicy brands build real, sustainable businesses. Previously one of Australia’s top OnlyFans creators, Lucy now uses her unique experience on both sides of the industry to help creators scale their income and grow their influence

Million Billion Media Website: millionbillionmedia.com

Lucy's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/imlucybanks/

*What we were consuming*

[Book] Kate Manne. Down Girl: The Logic of Misogyny (2017)

[Expo] SeEx (formerly SexPo) Australia. Adult lifestyle expo

CRUDE #36

Misty and Frank in Berlin are joined by Effie in London and special guests Dr Danielle and Celeste from the Somatica Institute to talk about their approach to sex and relationship counselling. Somatic healing covers emotions, communication, passion and sexual pleasure.

Celeste and Dr Danielle help clients their desires, boundaries, and feelings openly to became better listeners with their partners and the people they love.

Their innovative work has garnered international attention. Most notably through their roles as consulting producers and on-screen experts for Virgin Island, a groundbreaking British TV series on Channel 4 that introduces viewers to the transformative power of real-time intimacy coaching.

Instagram:

@somatica_institute

@celesteanddanielleofficial

TikTok: @celesteanddanielle

Websites:

somaticainstitute.com

learn.somatica.com

sexcoaching.com

*What we were consuming*

[Definition] Sex surrogate

[Series] Virigin Island

CRUDE #35

Misty and Frank in Berlin are joined by Effie in Spain and two very special guests to talk about female awakening and empowerment, OnlyFans, being ADHD and neurodivergent as well as burgeoning censorship in the US and OnlyFans. Mistress Kolipi and Øthyr took time out of their busy calendar(s) to share their life and missions with the Crudies

Mistress Kolipi and Øthyr describe themselves as are architects of desire who dismantle the boundaries between pain and pleasure, dominance and devotion.

Based in the San Francisco Bay Area, Mistress Kolipi and Øthyr are a queer POC artist duo who create erotic works that function as ritual, rebellion, and reclamation. Their films, images, and performances challenge the gaze, rewrite the rules, and invite audiences into deeper states of embodiment, surrender, and power.

Kolipi is a femme domme of colour and professional dominatrix whose ceremonial approach to kink merges discipline with transformation.

Øthyr is an award-winning film director, photographer, and music producer whose past work for Nike, Red Bull, National Geographic, The New York Times, and NY Fashion Week has earned three Cannes Lions. Their work has been featured alongside Ai Weiwei, bridging the worlds of art, sex, and political resistance.

Here is a master link where you can catch up on the duo's latest projects: HausofKo

Haus of Ko on Insta: Instagram: instagram.com/@haus.of.ko

Website: www.hausofko.com

*What we were consuming*

[Learning] The Consent Academy

[Film] Hump Film Festival

[Research - DSM 5] Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders

[US Law] Interstate Obscenity Definition Act (2025)

[SW documentary] Shame Shifters (Insta: https://www.instagram.com/shame_shifters/)

CRUDE #34

Misty and Frank in Berlin are joined by Effie in London to chat with special guest Talia as they discuss sexual abuse and how it can relate to sexuality to art and to self-understanding.

*Confidential/Anonymous Helplines*

UK

If you are over the age of 16, living in England & Wales, and have been affected by any form of sexual violence or abuse, specialist and confidential support is available 24/7. Call 0808 500 2222 or visit the 24/7 Rape and Sexual Abuse Support Line to chat online or find out more. 

Germany

Unter der Nummer 0800 22 55 530 ist das Hilfe-Telefon Sexueller Missbrauch montags, mittwochs und freitags von 9:00 bis 14:00 Uhr sowie dienstags und donnerstags von 15:00 bis 20:00 Uhr bundesweit, kostenfrei und anonym erreichbar.

*What we were consuming*

[Statistics] UNICEF report and statistics on child abuse globally

[Book] Roxanne Gay. Not That Bad: Dispatches from Rape Culture (2018)

[Wikipedia] Bravo: German Teen magazine

[Art movement] (Viennese Actionism - Wiener Aktionismus)

[Wikipedia] Hermann Nitsch

CRUDE #33

Misty and Frank in Berlin are joined by Effie in London to chat with the female founders of Berlin Nocturne —a kink-friendly, inclusive companionship agency.

From careers in marketing, art direction, health, and hospitality, these women found their way into seggswork and Berlin’s seggs positive scene.

We talk about why they started this project, what sets them apart in the world of companionship, and how they are building spaces and a community where diverse desire is not only welcomed—but celebrated in all its expressions: curious, queer, intimate, wild, soft, and powerful.

berlin-nocturne (.de)

moonlightsociety-berlin (.de)

*What we were consuming*

[Parties] Pinky Promise UK & Berlin

CRUDE #32

Misty and Frank in Berlin are joined by Effie in London to chat with special guest Dr Diane Mueller to talk about how to reignite and reset desire and passion in longtime relationships. Where Dr Diane's expertise lies in mainly monogamous couples, the Crudes discuss desire across the spectrum of relationship forms.

• How does dopamine affect relationships?
• And what are the siggles?

Late in the episode, the Crudes talk about dating apps and closing orgasm gaps in their own relationships. Not forgetting Misty's experience wrestling in coconut oil with 25 people at Liquid Love Berlin.

Dr. Diane Mueller, ND, DAOM, is a board certified sexologist with dual doctorates in Naturopathic as well as Acupuncture and Oriental Medicine. She's the founder of the sex education centre: MyLibidoDoc.com and hosts 'The Libido Lounge' podcast, where she helps monogamous couples create more passion, desire hotter seggs and better communication.

• Free Libido Quiz: Find the root causes (and solutions) for low libido: LibidoQuiz.com
• Free e-Book: Revive Your Love Life: 5 easy steps for mind-blowing orgasms and romance: hotterlife.com
• YesNoMaybe Checklist: MySexDoc.com

*What we were consuming*

[Dating app] Breeze

[Book] Emily Nagoski. Come as You Are (revised 2021)

[Definition] Limerence is a term to describe a state of involuntary obsession with another person, often characterized by an intense infatuation and a strong longing for emotional reciprocation. It's distinct from love, as it involves a focus on the possibility of a relationship rather than the established emotional connection and commitment of love.

CRUDE #31

Misty and Frank in Berlin and Effie in London are joined by special guest Velvetine to talk all about Shibari.

What's the difference between Shibari and bondage?

Is Shibari always seggsual?

How old is Shibari?

Velvetine is a Berlin-based Shibari model whose happy place is finding freedom in restraints. Coming to Shibari from BDSM, getting tied is an erotic and kinky practice for Velvetine and not just an artistic practice.

When she’s not found swinging from the ceiling in ropes, Velvetine is a kink and erotica writer and movement practitioner. You can find her on Instagram at Velvetine_dreams and for those of you pervs with F*tl*fe: _Velvetine_

*What we were consuming*

[Photography] Cate Blanchett does Shibari

*Recommendations for Shibari spaces*

Berlin:

KOR Berlin @korberlin on IG - rope jams on Fridays

Daruma @daruma_berlin - rope jams on Thursday evenings and Shibari life drawing events once per month

London:

Anatomie Studio @anatomielondon

Barcelona:

La Gabia @la_gabia_ | Shizen Studio @shizenstudio.bcn

CRUDE #30

Misty and Frank in Berlin are joined by Effie in London to chat to special guest Skadi to talk about all things CNC (Consensual Non-Consent). CNC will either send shivers down your spine or your genitals.

All the current research says that between 31% and 57% of women have fantasies in which they are forced into sex against their will. A huge for 9% to 17% of women, these fantasies are a frequent or favourite fantasy experience. CNC or rape fantasies are mainstream fantasy, that nobody talks about in mainstream media.

Why shouldn't we say rape or ravage fantasy?

What is active surrender?

What's a crime kink?

*What we were consuming*

[Definition] What Is Consensual Non-Consent? The Kink Shrouded in Fear and Misconception (Vice)

[Book] Submit by Sonnet (2024)

[Research] Women's Erotic Rape Fantasies: An Evaluation of Theory and Research

[Book] Come as you Are (2021)

[Book/Film] Gerald's Game (1992/2017)