Loosen up, girlies-- cuz this episode? We lay it on THICK. This week, we're hot on the scene (we wore tennis skirts and noooo panties) of the "crime" involving Congressional hopeful Alex Morse, the mayor of Bumfuck, Massachusetts and his supposed flirtations with college students. But that's not all: we also unpack Kamala Harris's veep nomination and talk about suppressing the gay urge to support a woman with nice hair and legs in spite of her hobby of terrorizing communities. Of course, we also touch on some REAL news-- that being the release of Cardi B and Megan Thee Stallion's "WAP"-- and what it means for whores in this house, this country, and this world!

Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC.

River Page - "The Woke Resurrection of a Gay Sex Panic" (Twink Revolution)