This week, Tim Romano bear hugs a muskie and counts your little floaters, we poach stocked trout because our dad says it’s OK, get adopted by a Mexican family that gives us illegal plants, and throw a drift boat in the dumpster because we don’t want to talk to strangers.

This week, C&R sound engineer “Magic” Mike Pedersen flies all the way from British Columbia for smoked dogfish with mustard on rye, we throw pork roll at striped bass from the top of the Empire State Building, get kicked out of Applebee’s for wearing vulgar T-shirts, and nearly burn down a church with hot chocolate peanut bunker action.

Too cheap for pro taxidermy? Learn how to botch every DIY attempt at preserving tails, jaws, teeth, skulls, and other fish parts in your kitchen.

This week, Jimmy Fee misses the mark on a PB British mullet by a mere five ounces, we get so tweaked about trophy tog that we throw our soiled waders in the trash, decide rigs we’ve been tying for 20 years are suddenly inadequate, and drink crab whiskey as we mourn a chance to fish for stripers we know aren’t even there.

This week, C&R listeners share their spine-chilling stories of bloodthirsty meth head encounters, run-ins with wolf-spider hybrids in the spirit world, and ghosts that just want to bum a smoke. Along the way, we’ll scare the clothes back onto naked hippies, meet Satan at the trout hole, and try to sleep while wild beasts circle some happy campers.

This week, Oliver Ngy gives us the slow pitch for managing bass fishing with lemon pepper, we enjoy bonefish stew while the law man inspects our anchor rope, lose expensive baits in the money pit that is boat ownership, and teach old-school Uncle Larry some new-school rockfish tricks.

This week, Ohio walleye savant Ross Robertson gets salty at the mall and stings sheep with his sharp wit, we almost wind up in jail for being too nice to a drunk gambling addict, treat a tuna run like the countdown to Chernobyl , and reach for some striper stars at an Atlantic City comedy hour.

This week, C&R regulars and newcomers tell the tales of their first-ever striped bass, we discuss mowing lawns to make that Van Staal money, catching milestone fish while eating Whopper sandwiches, winning rods in a game of darts, and completely misusing the Banjo Minnow.

This week, kayak killer Kevin Hughes hypes the coleslaw and downplays his redfish-mugging habit, we run chatter baits through what used to be the parking lot, score a topwater slam and break truck windows, and do our taxes while chunking with Big League Chew.

This week, legendary West Coast steelhead guide Rick Matney brings vodka to the prom and dances with Mr. Bubbles, we get shot at by ranch owners while catching 30-inch browns, steam to Russia to shoot Donner and Blitzen for crab bait, and tie three Wooly Buggers together years before that was cool.