Dead Jester Productions Podcast

After some time, the rain subsided and the heroes were able to find some warmth by the fire. The night was cold and damp, and they would be excited to start back on the road tomorrow. For the time being, they huddled together near the fire while The Jester played a song.

As the sun rose in the morning The Heroes check to see if their clothes were dry. As they were a bit damp, they set them onto the rocks surrounding the campfire. The Swordsman Hero decided to check out the surrounding area, as they weren't sure where they had ended up after being washed downriver.

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Setting up camp in a small grove of trees, the Heroes take off their soaked clothing and hang it up to dry. As they did, a slight rain began to fall. The Swordsman Hero and The Woman set up a tent as the Jester prepared them something to eat. They gathered around the campfire, doing what they could to keep the flame from going out. The rain slowly began to pour, and before long they found that keeping the campfire aflame would be a challenge.

They huddled together around the campfire, having constructed a small cover of soaked leaves and branches in an effort to suppress the rainfall from falling on it. Lightning flashed across the sky, and thunder rolled through the night. The Heroes realized that jumping into the river had probably not been such a great idea.

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With the horrific town of vampires behind them, the Heroes set out on their adventure. It looked as though it would rain, and so they hurried to reach the forest. Unfortunately for them, a river stood in their way. It was too far to go around, so they would need to make their way across where they were.

They grabbed their gear and held it above their heads, slowly making their way across. They realized they had made a mistake when they had been washed hundreds of yards downriver in the blink of an eye. They let the current take them, slowly drifting across to the other side as they did so. Eventually, they washed ashore and tried to spot trees for cover. They wanted to make camp before the rain arrived. They wouldn't want to get wet as night set in.

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From what he could best tell, the townsfolk charged with removing the vampire's remains had decided that they would make fine trophies, and had held onto them. Some had thought they could absorb the creature's powers by eating small amounts of its flesh. In doing so, they had turned themselves into foul beasts.

The Heroes knew how dangerous this could be. If the townsfolk had turned and were spreading the mutation, things could get out of hand very quickly. If this wasn't dealt with right away, the town would be lost. The Heroes made up their minds right away. They turned and left the town as quickly as they could, before they got caught up in another lengthy story arc involving the town and vampires.

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With the body disposed of, the heroes were happy to return to their meals. They finished up and cleaned up the kitchen. They were a bit mortified with the Jester's handiwork at first, but continued on. After they were satisfied with their work, they turned in for the night.

In the morning, they gathered up their things and set out to continue their adventure. They step out into the morning air and find the town to be surprisingly quiet. They make their way down to the market and find that nobody is around. At first they question this, but decide that it was probably nothing to worry about. They grab some supplies and leave the appropriate payment at each stall.

As they reach the edge of town, they spot an old man slumped up against a post. They walk up to him to ask if he knew anything about the missing townsfolk. As they reach him they notice he is badly wounded, and would likely not survive. A large wound covered his chest, and blood had soaked his clothing. They asked him what had happened, and he weakly explained.

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The Heroes decide they should remove the body, as they wouldn't want the rotting corpse to contaminate the food should they return later. The Swordsman Hero believed it would look suspicious if they carried a body out of the inn into an alley, and leaving it inside at all wasn't an option. The conclusion they came to was to chop it up and then dispose of it.

The Jester volunteered to do the work, as the Swordsman Hero had made them the meal. They left the Jester to his work, and returned to the dining area. They heard chopping and some scattering of pots and pans, and after a short time the Jester returned with a large potato sack. It appeared to be leaking, and he casually walked out the door with it. 

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The Heroes enjoyed their meal and relaxed in the empty inn. After some time they heard a noise coming from outside, but made no effort to investigate. A moment later the door opened and in crept the innkeep, apparently unaware of the Heroes' presence. They watched as she slowly sulked her way behind the bar. She grabbed a bottle and took a swig, and then the color drained from her face as she saw the Heroes sitting at their table.

She let out a surprised gasp, and ran through the door leading to the kitchen. The Heroes heard a slip on the stone floor and decided they would investigate. They walked into the kitchen and found the innkeep unconscious on the floor. It seemed as though she had slipped on a large pool of blood left behind by the previous chef, then fell and hit her head on a pile of pans left crudely thrown about.

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The Heroes settled back in at the inn, and enjoyed the peace and quiet of an empty building. The Swordsman Hero checked behind the bar and located a pantry filled to the brim with food and drinks. He set the drinks out for his companions and proceeded with the food to the kitchen.

The Heroes heard a clattering of pots and pans, as well as the searing sound of a fire cooking some meat. A chopping sound was followed by a few curses and what can only be described as the sound of a man looking around for medical supplies. A few moments later the Swordsman Hero returned with some plated food, and he set it down gingerly with bandaged hands.

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Happy with their handiwork, the Heroes trotted off in the direction of the Inn. As they did, the townsfolk cautiously huddled around the corpse of the vampire. They poked and prodded it with sticks, and when it didn't move they were confident it was indeed dead. They grouped together and lifted the creature up onto a wagon, readying it to be moved to the cemetery. The town butcher led a terrified horse up to the cart, and it worriedly led the cart away.

A number of residents had hopped onto the cart, eager to continue looking at the monstrous creature that had been slain. They pulled at its flesh, and peered into what was left of its caved in head. The butcher yelled at them to leave it be, but couldn't stop their curiosity. They ripped off its claws and held them like trophies, already forgetting that they had cowered inn fear of the beast just a short time ago. They thought to themselves that surely they could sell the parts and become rich, or perhaps find another use for the remains.

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The vampire let loose a violent scream and attempted to claw its way free from the undead holding it down, though the Swordsman Hero had drawn two knives and stabbed them through the creature's hands. Pinned to the ground and unable to get up, the vampire screeched and writhed in agony. Even with the threat currently contained, the Heroes weren't sure exactly what to do in order to dispose of it.

If they burned it again its flesh would likely regenerate as it had before, but if they simply stabbed a stake through its heart - the preferred method suggested by folk tales - it would likely survive. The Jester tested his own theory by violently crushing its head in with his mandolin. It gurgled on its own blood for a few seconds before it lay silently. Feeling as though their job was accomplished, the Heroes told the townspeople to burn the body and returned to the inn.

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