Dear Mattsons with Jeff and Terra

What do you do if your child tells you they are transgender? As a professional counselor we have been processing this with parents and kids for many years. It’s ok to be sad and concerned, but don’t panic, this doesn’t surprise God. We will encourage you to get support, continue to pursue a relationship with your child and hold the tension of love and truth as you navigate this journey.

Links for Supplemental Resources:

• https://www.christianparenting.org/articles/meet-them-with-jesus-responding-biblically-to-our-kids-problems/
• https://www.christianparenting.org/articles/talking-with-your-kids-about-dating-and-relationships/

• https://www.centerforfaith.com/ 

• Embodied: Transgender Identities, The Church, and What the Bible Has to Say 
• Living in a Gray World: A Christian Teen Guide to understanding Homosexuality 
• Gay Girl, Good God 
• https://jackiehillperry.com/
• https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6sj-ddtUHPc
• https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eZmV56uE7CE

Having our kids help out around the house can seem like more work for us, but remember we are teaching skills that will benefit our kids into adulthood. Join us as we give you practical ideas to implement chores for your children and talk through ways to set your child up for long-term success.

Links for Supplemental Resources:

• https://www.christianparenting.org/articles/raise-your-children-to-be-independent-its-ok-if-its-hard/
• https://www.christianparenting.org/articles/how-to-raise-diy-kids/
• https://www.christianparenting.org/articles/letting-go/

With media at our fingertips, most kids are exposed to sex and homosexuality from a young age. We need to have age appropriate, intentional conversations with our kids early so that we will be their trusted guide, and they will come to us with questions. Join us as we walk through how to discuss homosexuality with care and grace as we remind our children that everyone is worthy of dignity and respect and that we all need a Savior.

Links for Supplemental Resources:

• https://www.christianparenting.org/articles/talking-about-sex-big-words-for-little-ears/
• https://www.christianparenting.org/articles/meet-them-with-jesus-responding-biblically-to-our-kids-problems/
• https://www.christianparenting.org/articles/talking-with-your-kids-about-dating-and-relationships/

Kids that are constantly on social media and video games are missing out on the face to face connections that are vital to our human development and long term life skills. Join us as we talk through how to pursue your child and learn about the games he is playing and the friends he is connecting with online. We will also discuss how to create options and experiences outside of the digital space to foster those face to face connections that our children need.

Links for Supplemental Resources:

• https://www.christianparenting.org/articles/helping-your-son-navigate-the-digital-age/
• https://www.christianparenting.org/articles/the-real-digital-dilemma-our-children-need-us-to-lead/
• https://www.christianparenting.org/articles/social-media-screens-and-the-overindulgence-of-information/

The toddler and teen years are when kids push the limits, so it is normal to feel like you are constantly saying “No”. Join us as we walk through how to become a “Yes” parent by offering choices and consequences. We talk about when children are old enough to understand consequences, how to redirect younger toddlers and the correct language to use that will set your child up for success.

Links for Supplemental Resources:

• https://www.christianparenting.org/articles/3-ways-to-love-your-challenging-toddler-well/
• https://www.christianparenting.org/articles/decide-discipline-toddlers/
• https://www.christianparenting.org/articles/pointing-your-preschooler-to-jesus/

Grandparents are a huge blessing to our children, but sometimes they do not realize that we parent differently than how we were raised.  We will walk you through three steps that will show you how to affirm grandparents contributions, while still setting boundaries.

Links for Supplemental Resources:

• https://www.christianparenting.org/articles/four-truths-about-childhood-for-grandparents-to-embrace/
• https://www.christianparenting.org/articles/three-ways-to-strengthen-the-bond-with-your-grandkids/
• https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=px5AzUGaHow&list=PLdPzQ_cUwCbRPOxygemmbhhIOCD67AvSx&index=13

The way we dress informs the world a little bit about you. We want to take shame and legalism out of the modesty discussion and make sure that we do not put the pressure of others' purity on our daughters. Instead join us as we discuss how to encourage our daughters to dress in a way that will highlight who they are and not put the focus on their body.

When you regularly attend church and make God a priority, it is extremely hard to watch your college child not make that same choice. College is when a lot of kids make their faith their own and live that out in different ways. We will encourage you to give your child room to breathe and make their own choices, but continue to pursue them as a person and stay connected. Grace takes the long view and this time away from church may just be a small part of their story.

As a parent, we are on alert and try to protect our children from being bullied, but what happens when we realize our child is the bully? Remember insecurity is at the core of bullying and you need to discover why your child is acting out.

We will walk you through teaching your child to ask for forgiveness and how to work with the other parents as you build a safe community that encourages our children to repair relationships after they mess up.

We live in a culture that focuses on achievement and grooms our children to desire recognition. 

The scriptures are full of parables and ways that we can talk to our kids about how God sees us even when others don’t. Join us as we discuss how affirming our children’s gifts even those that are unseen is a powerful way to ease the pain and jealousy of lacking recognition and helps our kids celebrate others well.