Dismantling Dysfunction

Does this sound familiar? Despite doing all you can to hold your relationship together, and everything you've sacrificed to make it work, it's still dysfunctional and you're still miserable. The more you try to "fix" your partner or figure out new ways of approaching them to change their behavior, the worse it gets. Frustrating, isn't it? That's because while we try to rescue our partner, child or friend and fix the relationship, we should actually be focusing on ourselves and how we are contributing to the codependent relationship, recognizing the developmental delay that has us acting like the only power we have is to decide to submit and conform.

There are 8 distinct codependent strategies in total: 4 are strategies used to dominate in the relationship (if you curious to learn more about them, make sure you check out episode #40 – Dominant Dysfunctional Codependent Strategies) and 4 are submissive strategies. Those who tend to be submissive in a codependent relationship, will act out from one of the four Codependent Submissive Strategies: Compliant, People Pleasing, Self-devaluing and Self-deception.

In today's episode, we explore the different Submissive Strategies, talk about how each of them manifests in relationships and reveal that they are actually survival coping strategies that begin in our childhood. We'll also recount many stories (our own and of our clients') and share tips and tricks for dismantling Submissive Behavioral Strategies used in codependent relationships that you can start implementing today. Tune in to make sure you don't miss out on the gems we share this week!

If you want to know more about Anne & Heather's work with dismantling dysfunctions, check out:

https://www.dranitsaris-hilliard.com

Make sure you sign up for our weekly newsletters for tips on how to dismantle dysfunction and develop your leaders: https://bit.ly/dismantlingdysfunction

IN THIS EPISODE:

• [01:29] Episode Introduction
• [02:24] Dominant vs. Submissive Codependent Strategies
• [07:14] Compliant Strategy
• [16:38] People Pleasing Strategy
• [29:25] Self-devaluing Strategy
• [33:08] Self-deception Strategy
• [44:19] Episode Gem
• [47:54] Episode Wrap Up

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

• Compliant, People Pleasing, Self-devaluing and Self-deception strategies manifest themselves in different ways in relationships, but they all are used to get the other person to take responsibility for them by giving in, going along and praising the other person for their help. While pop psychology definitions tell us these are learned behaviors, they're actually intrinsic survival strategies begun in childhood to ensure psychological security and well-being.
• For submissive codependents who submit to keep themselves out of harms way and manage their anxiety and fear of being alone, they need to learn to assert themselves and develop conflict management skills. You must recognize they feel threatened by conflict and learn to tolerate differences without feeling rejected. Think about what the purpose is for you using the strategy. Are you afraid that if you don't submit, you'll feel anxious or lose the relationship; that it will prevent conflict? Make a note of what you are afraid of and why.
• If you are struggling in relationships because you or others are using Submissive Dysfunctional Codependent Strategies, you are not alone. Listen to the episode to learn more about the many strategies that create codependent relationships. Contact us for more information on how we can help.

Narcissists aren't the only people who are manipulative. It's a primary Codependent Strategy used to control and dominate in a codependent relationship. The use of indirect communication and manipulation to get their own way, including pouting, guilting, becoming outraged or indignant, devaluing and gaslighting to name a few tactics make the other person submit because they feel so bad about themselves.

We don't often think of it this way, but how people behave in relationships is very brain dependent. Our psychological type (for example, our MBTI® type or Striving Style®) plays a large role in determining the self-protective position we're most likely to take in relationships – most of the time we do it without even realizing it! Those who tend to dominate in a codependent relationship, will act out from one of the four Codependent Dominant Strategies: Controlling, Caretaking, Disrupting and Personalizing.

In today's episode, we explore the different Dominant Strategies, talk about how each of them manifests in relationships and reveal that they are actually survival coping strategies that begin in our childhood. We'll also recount many stories (our own and of our clients') and share tips and tricks for dismantling Dominant Behavioral Strategies used in codependent relationships that you can start implementing today. Tune in to make sure you don't miss out on the gems we share this week!

If you want to know more about Anne & Heather's work with dismantling dysfunctions, check out:

https://www.dranitsaris-hilliard.com

Make sure you sign up for our weekly newsletters for tips on how to dismantle dysfunction and develop your leaders: https://bit.ly/dismantlingdysfunction

IN THIS EPISODE:

• [01:33] Episode Introduction
• [02:32] Dominant vs. Submissive Codependent Strategies
• [07:55] Controlling Strategy
• [19:10] Caretaking Strategy
• [28:04] Disrupting Strategy
• [36:03] Personalizing Strategy
• [43:10] Episode Gem
• [46:29] Episode Wrap Up

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

• Codependent Strategies can be grouped into two based on the fight/flight response. Dominant strategies are connected to the fight reaction and Submissive is connected to the flight/freeze reaction. We can use both Dominant and Submissive strategies when we feel threatened but tend to favour one grouping over the other.
• Controlling, Caretaking, Disrupting and Personalizing Codependent Strategies manifest themselves in different ways in relationships, but they all are used to get the other person to submit to what they want and need through devaluing, manipulating and guilt-producing tactics. While pop psychology definitions tell us these are learned behaviors, they're actually intrinsic survival strategies begun in childhood to ensure psychological security and well-being.
• To stop being at the mercy of codependent behavior in relationships, you need to identify and own the Dominant Codependent Strategies you use and reflect on why you use them. Think about what the purpose is for you using the strategy. Are you afraid that if you don't take over, you'll feel anxious or out of control; that others won't respect you; that it will prevent conflict? Make a note of what you are afraid of and why.
• If you are struggling in relationships because you or others are using Dominant Dysfunctional Codependent Strategies, you are not alone. Listen to the episode to learn more about the many strategies that create codependent relationships. Contact us for more information on how we can help.

Would you consider yourself codependent? When asked that question, some people will say yes, and others will say, no, but I think my partner is. Most of the time we equate Codependency with a clingy, needy person who takes a lot of abuse from their partner, boss, children, and friends. We may think of Codependency as the peacekeeper in relationships, putting needs aside and taking care of others or of someone who constantly blabbers or complains about their partner and never talks about themselves or their own needs. Even worse, people like that never accept advice.

As they say, it takes two to tango and if two people form a relationship with one being a dominant and one a submissive person, as with most role-driven patriarchal, traditional marriages, both people are codependent. As a general needs a soldier to boss around and a caretaker needs a patient to care for, both are meeting psychological survival needs.

In today's episode, we explore the Dysfunction of Codependent Relationships, talk about multiple myths surrounding this Dysfunction (did you know it is not a mental illness?), uncovering less talked about realities that can empower anyone hiding out behind the shield of Codependency. We'll also recount numerous stories (our own and of our clients') and share tips and tricks for developing from Codependency that you can start implementing today. Tune in to make sure you don't miss out on the gems we share this week!

If you want to know more about Anne & Heather's work with dismantling dysfunctions in organizations and leadership behavior at Caliber Leadership Systems, check out:

https://dismantlingdysfunction.com

https://www.dranitsaris-hilliard.com

https://caliberleadership.com

Tired of feeling, thinking and acting like you are 'not enough'? Pick up your copy of Power Past the Imposter Syndrome: A Brain-Building Framework for Changing Painful, Self-Limiting Beliefs & Habits of Mind.

Make sure you sign up for our weekly newsletters for tips on how to dismantle dysfunction and develop your leaders: https://bit.ly/dismantlingdysfunction

Do you have a story you would like to share on our show? Contact us at [email protected].

IN THIS EPISODE:

• [01:33] Episode Introduction
• [02:25] What Codependency Is and What It Is Not
• [07:45] Codependency and the Archetypes of Survival
• [21:36] Myths and Realities of Codependency
• [33:06] Episode Gem
• [35:36] Episode Wrap Up

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

• Codependency and codependent relationships are surrounded by myths. The most important to note is that Codependency is a developmental delay of childhood and NOT a mental illness although people tend to approach it as though it is. As a result, they think they have to recover from it instead of developing through it.
• The Codependent Developmental Stage happens from puberty to our early 20s. This is a time when we can survive physically on our own, but our brain and relationship development apparatus still require another decade before it moves to the Adult Stage of Development. If our development is thwarted during this time, this is the relationship pattern we are left with to form our adult relationships with.
• Codependency is a self-protective coping strategy with two people operating from survival needs. One needs attention and constant support to survive, and the other needs to give attention and support to survive. They are equally dysfunctional although we mostly see the codependent person as the one who is the victim of someone whose self-protective style is to dominate.
• Do you feel like the folks in your personal or work life are stuck in the Codependency Stage of development? Listen to the full episode to learn how to develop from it and make the shift from living from our Self-protective Personas.

Some people identify as procrastinators, some as perfectionists. And still, others - as risk averse. These proclamations are usually made when someone is asked to do something that feels scary or out of their comfort zone. They expect others to simply accept that this is who they are and to respect their "boundaries" despite the commitments they may have made. These same people feel powerless to do anything about their own self-limiting and often destructive beliefs and tendencies. They say they can't help themselves, and act as though they have no power to even try.

Little do they know that they are in the grip of the Saboteur, that nasty little self-protective Archetype that takes the fun out of trying new things, speaking up or interviewing for a job you've been lusting after for months. Catastrophizing, instead of being optimistic about possibilities. Giving up instead of going for it.

In today's episode, we explore the Saboteur Archetype, its tendency to keep us stuck in the "safe" status quo, whilst also making us believe we are never good enough to even try. We'll also recount numerous Saboteur Archetype stories (our own and of our clients') and share tips and tricks we use to get out of the comfort zone – while it's a nice place to visit, it is no place to live your life. Tune in to make sure you don't miss out on the gems we share this week!

If you want to know more about Anne & Heather's work with dismantling dysfunctions in organizations and leadership behavior at Caliber Leadership Systems, check out:

https://dismantlingdysfunction.com

https://www.dranitsaris-hilliard.com

https://caliberleadership.com

Tired of feeling, thinking and acting like you are 'not enough'? Pick up your copy of Power Past the Imposter Syndrome: A Brain-Building Framework for Changing Painful, Self-Limiting Beliefs & Habits of Mind.

Make sure you sign up for our weekly newsletters for tips on how to dismantle dysfunction and develop your leaders: https://bit.ly/dismantlingdysfunction

Do you have a story you would like to share on our show? Contact us at [email protected].

IN THIS EPISODE:

• [01:34] Episode Introduction
• [02:51] What is the Saboteur Archetype?
• [05:57] Status Quo & Stagnation
• [14:36] The Saboteur at Work
• [27:41] Episode Gem
• [29:42] Episode Wrap Up

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

• The Saboteur is the Guardian of Change and at its highest potency, it invites change into our lives that lead to the expression and development of our Authentic Self. When self-protective, instead of feeling optimistic, it catastrophizes, generating fears of loss, abandonment, or failure as a result of striving to achieve our potential.
• While the Saboteur is strongly connected to change, when we act from fear it becomes the Guardian of our comfort zone. We are willing to give up so much to be safe, betraying our hopes, dreams, and potential by sabotaging opportunities and relationships just to be secure. The core belief of the Saboteur Imposter Syndrome Persona is that no good will come of any change.
• Procrastination is a strategy the Saboteur uses to get in their own way. It's when we decide to do something or know we have to get something done and we still don't do anything. We drag our feet and know that we are procrastinating yet make no move. It is a way of maintaining the status quo.
• Do you feel like the folks in your personal or work life live from the Saboteur Archetype? Listen to the full episode to learn how to start living from your Authentic Self!

We are sure most people would agree that it's absolutely horrifying when competent and accomplished adults resort to childish behavior, like having temper tantrums, sulking, pretending nothing is their fault, or shifting the blame to others for their mistakes, to name a few. Yet we all do it - and don't think for a moment you don't!

All of us can abdicate responsibility or blame others in situations that make us feel insecure or embarrass us. When we see leaders fly into a rage because they are confronted or insist defensively that it isn't their fault when employees miss deadlines, it's hard to know what to do. Or when parents complain about their children's behavior, yelling and arguing with them, calling them bad and shaming them for who they are, it's not just dysfunctional… it's destructive.

In today's episode, we explore the Child Archetype, its skewed relationship to responsibility and constant need for approval – be it from their families, friends or managers. We'll also recount numerous Child Archetype stories (our own and of our clients') and share tips and tricks we use to stop making ourselves safe and small and so that we regain the driver's seat in our lives. Tune in to make sure you don't miss out on the gems we share this week!

If you want to know more about Anne & Heather's work with dismantling dysfunctions in organizations and leadership behavior at Caliber Leadership Systems, check out:

https://dismantlingdysfunction.com

https://www.dranitsaris-hilliard.com

https://caliberleadership.com

Tired of feeling, thinking and acting like you are 'not enough'? Pick up your copy of Power Past the Imposter Syndrome: A Brain-Building Framework for Changing Painful, Self-Limiting Beliefs & Habits of Mind.

Make sure you sign up for our weekly newsletters for tips on how to dismantle dysfunction and develop your leaders: https://bit.ly/dismantlingdysfunction

Do you have a story you would like to share on our show? Contact us at [email protected].

IN THIS EPISODE:

• [01:33] Episode Introduction and Overview
• [02:45] What is the Child Archetype?
• [13:25] Relationship to Responsibility
• [16:30] The Child Leadership Persona
• [27:44] Episode Gem
• [30:10] Episode Wrap Up

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

• When we shift to what we call the Child Shield, we start using the behaviors and characteristics of the Persona we need to shield us from the perceived psychological threat. When we use the Child Archetype as a survival mechanism, we act as though we have no power and remain dependent on others to decide for us.
• The Child Archetype has to do with our relationship to responsibility. Based on whether we take responsibility for ourselves, our beliefs, our ideas, and advocate for them, or we silence ourselves and go along with the status quo giving our responsibility to others and remain dependent on them. We can also take excessive responsibility for things that aren't ours.
• The Child Leadership Persona has both a dominant and submissive aspect to it. As with children, this Persona can be bossy or bratty (dominant and autocratic) and insist on things being done their way or they can be submissive (permissive) and go along because they are afraid of the extra responsibility.
• Do you feel like the folks in your personal or work life live from the Child Archetype? Listen to the full episode to learn how to start living from your Authentic Self!

If there is anyone in your life who tends to agree with you when you know they disagree, you're acquainted with the Prostitute Archetype (before you say anything – as you likely got caught off guard after reading that - when we talk about the Prostitute Archetype it's NOT related to sex!). People using this Archetype believe it's a whole lot safer if they just keep their mouths shut. It's true that everyone does this to a certain extent - we go along to get along, pick our battles, and might not speak up when we really aren't invested one way or another, however, the Prostitute Archetype does it ALL THE TIME!

People who live from this Persona don't even bother negotiating for what they want, instead rationalizing, doing mental gymnastics, and finding workarounds to get what they need in secret. The problem is that at the same time they whine they aren't being respected or if it's being used by a parent or leader, that they aren't listened to. They don't see how their permissive behavior and willingness to sell out their integrity are at the root of their dysfunctional relationships.

In today's episode, we explore the Prostitute Archetype, the tendency to sell out its integrity for the sake of security, and the loss of self-esteem that occurs as a result. We'll also recount numerous Prostitute Archetype stories (our own and of our clients) and share tips and tricks for empowering yourself and gaining the courage to live up to your own values. Tune in to make sure you don't miss out on the gems we share this week!

If you want to know more about Anne & Heather's work with dismantling dysfunctions in organizations and leadership behavior at Caliber Leadership Systems, check out:

https://dismantlingdysfunction.com

https://www.dranitsaris-hilliard.com

https://caliberleadership.com

Pick up your copy of So, You Think You Can Lead?: A Guide to Developing Your Leadership Authority and Potential

Make sure you sign up for our weekly newsletters for tips on how to dismantle dysfunction and develop your leaders: https://bit.ly/dismantlingdysfunction

Do you have a story you would like to share on our show? Contact us at [email protected].

IN THIS EPISODE:

• [01:51] Episode Introduction and Overview
• [03:21] What is the Prostitute Archetype?
• [05:34] Importance of Integrity
• [21:59] Imposter Syndrome & The Prostitute Archetype
• [29:36] Episode Gem
• [32:18] Episode Wrap Up

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

• The Prostitute Archetype trades in power. It is mostly unspoken and sometimes it is hard to see that there is a trade-off at all. When expressing an opposing opinion or asking for something for us, we have a conversation with ourselves and come up with reasons and excuses to put the needs of others first.
• When we shift to the Prostitute Shield, we start using the behaviors and characteristics of the Persona we need to shield us from the perceived psychological threat. In other words, we are on the defensive, using fight-flight instinctual reactions.
• The Prostitute Persona causes us to carry a feeling within us that we are lacking, that we are not enough and is closely related to the Imposter Syndrome. As a result, we're compelled to look outside of ourselves to find our wholeness. We believe that we can fill what we perceive as lacking in ourselves by selling ourselves out to others so that they'll approve of us and affirm our value.
• Do you feel like the folks in your personal or work life live from the Prostitute Archetype? Listen to the full episode to learn what you can do to start living from your Authentic Self!

We all know people who always seem to be victims of someone or some situation. People who blame others when disappointing or frustrating things happen to them or even when they make a mistake. They don't discriminate and will blame their boss, peers, direct reports, family, partner, children - anyone is subject to their ability to spin a story to make it look like they are the victims while they in fact are victimizing others.

But don't try rescuing them, because if you have ever tried helping someone who is trapped in the Victim Persona, you've discovered that they really don't want help - they want you to side with their exaggerated version of whatever story they are telling. If any of these observations apply, you may be dealing with people who suffer from the Victim Syndrome.

In today's episode, we explore the Drama Triangle and the three personas associated with it: the Victim, the Persecutor / Victimizer, and the Rescuer / Hero (if you are interested in learning more about these roles that keep you stuck and how to power past them, make sure you check out our book, Power Past the Imposter Syndrome by clicking here!). We'll also recount personal and client Victim stories and share tips and tricks for empowering yourself and leaving the Drama Triangle behind for good. Tune in to make sure you don't miss out on the gems we share this week!

If you want to know more about Anne & Heather's work with dismantling dysfunctions in organizations and leadership behavior at Caliber Leadership Systems, check out:

https://dismantlingdysfunction.com

https://www.dranitsaris-hilliard.com

https://caliberleadership.com

Stop contributing to organizational dysfunction. Pick up your copy of So, You Think You Can Lead?: A Guide to Developing Your Leadership Authority and Potential

Make sure you sign up for our weekly newsletters for tips on how to dismantle dysfunction and develop your leaders: https://bit.ly/dismantlingdysfunction

Are you dealing with an organizational dysfunction you need help with? Or do you have a story you would like to share on our show? Contact us at [email protected].

IN THIS EPISODE:

• [01:50] Episode introduction and overview
• [05:21] What is the Victim Archetype?
• [10:53] Exploring the Drama Triangle
• [13:00] The Victim Persona
• [15:20] The Persecutor / Victimizer Persona
• [20:52] The Rescuer / Hero Persona
• [38:43] Episode Gem
• [41:41] Episode wrap up

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

• The Victim Leadership Persona is really powerful and often used when we feel hurt or think that we are powerless to do anything about the situation. When we use this Persona, we refuse to take responsibility for ourselves.
• The Victim Persona is associated with Karpman's Drama Triangle. The triangle involves 3 distinct positions or roles: Victim (Flight), the Persecutor / Victimizer (Fight), or the Rescuer / Hero (Freeze). Behavior from all three positions may be very different but it has the same intention, which is to gain control of the behaviour of others and restore a feeling of power in ourselves.
• The only way to 'defeat' the roles is to ensure you take responsibility for yourself. To experience a fulfilling life requires a conscious willingness to get off the Triangle and extend grace to those still encumbered by their drama.
• Do you feel like the folks in your personal or work life act out from their Drama Triangle roles? Listen to the full episode to learn what you can do to exit the Triangle and empower yourself!

Complain, complain, complain... We hear an endless myriad of complaints these days from leaders who believe that disengagement, lack of quality, poor work ethic, and entitled behaviors are the employee's fault, and they have no power to do anything about it. When and why did leaders become so disempowered?

It seems that leadership powerlessness may have slowly crept in over the last decade on the heels of the popularity of the extreme version of laisse-faire leadership, otherwise known as Permissive Leadership (if you haven't already, you must check out our Episode #13 – Dysfunctions of Permissive Leadership to learn more!). Clearly, if leaders want to play 'good' guys or gals and will keep abdicating or giving away their authority to decide, define, and hold employees accountable out of some notion that employees will be more productive, they will continue to have lots to whine about.

In today's episode, we share some practical tips for dismantling the Dysfunction of Disempowerment that you can use if your organization suffers from this dysfunction. We'll also talk about some of the common consequences to the organizations when leaders disempower themselves, reveal real client stories that illustrate just how common it is to find this type of leadership behavior in organizations today and teach you how to recognize the symptoms in yourself and your workplace! Tune in to make sure you don't miss out on the gems we share this week.

If you want to know more about Anne & Heather's work with dismantling dysfunctions in organizations and leadership behavior at Caliber Leadership Systems, check out:

https://dismantlingdysfunction.com

https://www.dranitsaris-hilliard.com

https://caliberleadership.com

Stop contributing to organizational dysfunction. Pick up your copy of So, You Think You Can Lead?: A Guide to Developing Your Leadership Authority and Potential

Make sure you sign up for our weekly newsletters for tips on how to dismantle dysfunction and develop your leaders: https://bit.ly/dismantlingdysfunction

Are you dealing with an organizational dysfunction you need help with? Or do you have a story you would like to share on our show? Contact us at [email protected].

IN THIS EPISODE:

• [01:25] Episode introduction and overview
• [02:21] What is the Dysfunction of Disempowerment?
• [07:59] Take charge: create a leadership vision
• [12:19] How to step out of your comfort zone
• [16:56] Start developing leadership potency
• [22:02] Drop a gem
• [26:04] Episode wrap up

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

• Disempowerment and impotence are characterized as a leader's inability to take effective action, accompanied by feelings of helplessness and a leader's perceived lack of power to change or improve a situation.
• To empower yourself as a leader, you need to get comfortable with being uncomfortable. You must learn to make difficult decisions and stand behind them, facing the consequences of errors and the pleasure of your successes. Stepping out of your comfort zone means making difficult decisions and not backing down when things get hard.
• Leaving the comfort zone is hard enough as it is – don't try doing it alone! Make sure you create a support system for yourself – reach out to a leadership coach or a mentor – to ensure you have help when working through defensivenss and resistance.
• Do you feel like the folks in your organization are contributing to the Dysfunction of Disempowerment? Listen to the full episode to learn what you can do to start dismantling the Dysfunction of Disempowerment today!

Why is it that leaders keep themselves so busy that they don't have time to deal with their people? And why, despite their position of power, do leaders struggle with asserting their authority and managing the performance of their employees?

It is all too common for employees to bring their personal issues to work with the expectation that their boss will take special care of them. This form of employee entitlement has some leaders avoiding their employees out of fear that they will not know how to handle the situation. Leaders are giving away their power to lead and are instead choosing the seemingly easier route, namely, to be "liked" by their employees. Yet these are the same leaders that end up drowning in employee and performance issues and are frustrated by employee entitlement, resistance, and opposition. Because leadership is fraught with challenges, leaders are abdicating their authority and giving away their power. After all, why would anyone spend time doing something that made them feel impotent?

In today's episode, we discuss how leaders contribute to the Dysfunction of Disempowerment and share some practical tips you can use if your organization suffers from this dysfunction. We'll also share real client stories that illustrate just how common it is to find this type of leadership behavior in organizations today. Tune in to learn about how leaders contribute to the Dysfunction of Disempowerment and how to recognize the symptoms in yourself and your organization!

If you want to know more about Anne & Heather's work with dismantling dysfunctions in organizations and leadership behavior at Caliber Leadership Systems, check out:

https://dismantlingdysfunction.com

https://www.dranitsaris-hilliard.com

https://caliberleadership.com

Stop contributing to organizational dysfunction. Pick up your copy of So, You Think You Can Lead?: A Guide to Developing Your Leadership Authority and Potential

Make sure you sign up for our weekly newsletters for tips on how to dismantle dysfunction and develop your leaders: https://bit.ly/dismantlingdysfunction

Are you dealing with an organizational dysfunction you need help with? Or do you have a story you would like to share on our show? Contact us at [email protected].

IN THIS EPISODE:

• [01:32] Episode introduction and overview
• [02:26] What is the Dysfunction of Disempowerment?
• [14:20] Take responsibility for feelings, not leading
• [18:42] Excessive inclusion in decision making
• [23:31] Don't see how their behavior contributes to poor performance
• [29:22] Drop a gem
• [31:32] Episode wrap up

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

• Leaders give rise to the Dysfunction of Disempowerment when theygive their power and authority away in an attempt to disguise their own incompetence, inexperience or inability to deal with the issues that are presenting being presented to them.
• Rather than holding their decision-making authority, disempowered leaders busy themselves with tasks that make them feel competent, allowing and enabling employees to do things their own way. This fuels the flames of employee entitlement.
• Focusing on performance instead of feelings, developing emotional intelligence, and building leadership skills increases the results you can achieve as a leader.
• Do you feel like the leaders in your organization may be contributing to the Dysfunction of Disempowerment in your organization? Listen to the full episode to learn what you can do to start dismantling the Dysfunction of Disempowerment today!

In today's workplaces, accountability has become part of a leader's role they increasingly avoid. They avoid difficult conversations, let employees miss deadlines and waste precious time and resources, all to the detriment of the organization. Impulsiveness, entitlement and emotions which create more drama than results are no longer held in check by leaders who are supposed to be managing and developing performance. Everyone is noticing the bar slipping from high to mediocre performance as a result, with leaders doing nothing to stop the decline.

Recent research conducted by the Futures Company found that the average worker spends over 2 hours per day engaged in drama of some sort– arguing, venting, resisting change, or just not aligning with the organization's needs. A lack of accountability has proven to be one of the key sources of workplace drama. This behavior zaps the happiness of staff while costing the organization millions of dollars annually. Imagine how much more beneficial it would be if that time and energy could be recaptured and put toward issue resolution, performance mastery and productivity!

In today's episode, we discuss the Dysfunction of Accountability and share some practical tips that you can start using today if this dysfunction is causing your organization to suffer. We'll also share real client stories that illustrate just how common this dysfunction is. Tune in to find out tips on how you and your organization can help dismantle the Dysfunction of Accountability especially if it's suffocating your organization's success.

If you want to know more about Anne & Heather's work with dismantling dysfunctions in organizations and leadership behavior at Caliber Leadership Systems, check out:

https://dismantlingdysfunction.com

https://www.dranitsaris-hilliard.com

https://caliberleadership.com

Stop contributing to organizational dysfunction. Pick up your copy of So, You Think You Can Lead?: A Guide to Developing Your Leadership Authority and Potential

Make sure you sign up for our weekly newsletters for tips on how to dismantle dysfunction and develop your leaders: https://bit.ly/dismantlingdysfunction

Are you dealing with an organizational dysfunction you need help with? Or do you have a story you would like to share on our show? Contact us at [email protected].

IN THIS EPISODE: Are their more points than this?

• [01:45] Episode introduction and overview
• [06:38] Create an accountability framework
• [08:50] Set leadership expectations
• [12:58] Manage performance to expectations
• [16.12] Episode gem and practical takeaway
• [17.59] Episode wrap up

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

• Leaders give rise to the Dysfunction of Accountability when they are afraid of having difficult conversations or don't know how to deal with opposition, defensiveness and emotionality from employees.
• Accountability is critical to high performance and to the success of an organization and its people. Without it, employees are more prone to underperform without fear of being held accountable.
• A system for accountability that includes goal-setting, corrective and supportive feedback, and employee engagement are critical components for fostering an environment that encourages accountability. When employees clearly understand the standard they are being held to, and are held to account, their performance is much more likely to improve.
• Think you might be suffering from issues caused by the Dysfunction of Accountability in your workplace? Listen to the full episode to learn what you can do to start empowering yourself and fighting back against the Dysfunction of Accountability today!