Divorce Dialogues

Divorce Dialogues

By Katherine MillerSociety & Culture
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Divorce Dialogues episodes

  • Process Choice in High-Conflict Divorce with Bill Eddy
    Traditionally, alternative dispute resolution methods like mediation and collaborative divorce are seen as a good fit for couples who are civil to each other and simply need a professional to support them in the legal aspects of the process. But Bill Eddy argues that the non-adversarial processes are crucial for high-conflict people navigating divorce.
    Bill Eddy is a lawyer, therapist, mediator and the co-founder and Training Director of the High Conflict Institute. He has become an international expert on managing disputes involving high-conflict personalities and personality disorders, and he provides training on the subject to professionals all over the world. Bill is a Certified Family Law Specialist and the Senior Family Mediator at the National Conflict Resolution Center in Sand Diego. He is the author of several books, including High Conflict People in Legal Disputes, Splitting: Protecting Yourself While Divorcing Someone with Borderline or Narcissistic Personality Disorder, and BIFF: Quick Responses to High-Conflict People.
    Today, Bill sits down with Katherine to explain why high-conflict people need a non-adversarial divorce process. He shares the benefits of consulting a lawyer during the mediation process and the significance of going into alternative dispute resolution with a focus on the future. Bill describes what is involved in his pre-mediation coaching as well as his approach to mediation when a restraining order is involved. Listen in for Bill’s insight on communicating with high-conflict people and finding a lawyer who supports mediation and the collaborative divorce process.
    Topics Covered
    Why high-conflict people need a non-adversarial divorce process
    • Court escalates adversarial thinking
    • Gives rise to false allegations, abuse
    How high-conflict people are more sensitive to feeling attacked
    The benefit of consulting a lawyer during the mediation process
    The value of a divorce financial analyst in alternative dispute resolution
    How informed consent serves as the key to a non-adversarial process
    What’s involved in Bill’s pre-mediation coaching
    How Bill handles mediation when a restraining order is involved
    How collaborative teaches high-conflict couples communication skills
    How parenting plans can be structured around limited contact in extreme cases
    How the self-doubt people feel during divorce is exacerbated by lack of respect
    The techniques Bill recommends for communicating with high-conflict people
    • EAR—empathy, attention and respect
    • BIFF—brief, informative, friendly and firm (i.e.: email, Facebook)
    Why Bill suggests finding a lawyer who will support mediation/collaborative divorce
    Connect with Bill Eddy
    High Conflict Institute: https://www.highconflictinstitute.com/
    National Conflict Resolution Center: https://www.ncrconline.com/
    Resources
    New Ways for Families: https://www.highconflictinstitute.com/new-ways/
    BIFF: Quick Responses to High-Conflict People by Bill Eddy: https://www.highconflictinstitute.com/bookstores/biff
    How to Write a BIFF Response DVD: https://www.highconflictinstitute.com/bookstores/how-to-write-a-biff-response-dvd
    Coaching for BIFF Response DVD: https://www.highconflictinstitute.com/bookstores/coaching-for-biff-response
    Our Family Wizard: https://www.ourfamilywizard.com/directory/high-conflict-institute
    Is Divorce Mediation for You? DVD: https://www.highconflictinstitute.com/bookstores/is-divorce-mediation-for-you-dvd
    High Conflict People in Legal Disputes by Bill Eddy: https://www.highconflictinstitute.com/bookstores/high-conflict-people-in-legal-disputes-2nd-edition
    Splitting: Protecting Yourself While Divorcing Someone with Borderline or Narcissistic Personality Disorder by Bill Eddy: https://www.highconflictinstitute.com/bookstores/splitting-protecting-yourself-while-divorcing
    27 min
  • Dignity, Self-Preservation and Conflict Resolution in Relationships with Donna Hicks
    Whether a conflict involves international powers, corporate leadership, or a husband and wife, a violation of dignity is always the underlying cause. No matter the situation, we are all looking to be treated as if we have worth and value, and it is this fundamental desire for dignity that makes us human. How can a better understanding of the principles of dignity help us improve our relationships and address conflicts in a way that doesn’t perpetuate a destructive dynamic?
    Donna Hicks has 20-plus years of experience as a facilitator in international conflicts in the Middle East, Sri Lanka, Colombia, Cuba, Northern Ireland and the US. Her understanding of dignity and the role it plays in resolving conflict has transformed work environments for prominent companies, nonprofits and government agencies, and Donna’s impressive client roster includes the World Bank, the United Nations, the US Navy and the Senate of Colombia. She was a featured speaker at TEDx Stormont in 2013 and co-host of Facing the Truth for the BBC with Archbishop Desmond Tutu in 2006. Donna is the author of the bestseller Dignity: The Essential Role It Plays in Resolving Conflict, and she has been invited to discuss the topic on prominent media outlets including the BBC, Fox News and NPR.
    Today, Donna sits down with Katherine to explain how her work with international conflict resolution translates to families. She discusses the universal desire to be treated as if we matter as the one aspiration that unites us all. Donna speaks to the concept of dignity within the context of marriage, describing how self-preservation instincts make it difficult to give our partners the benefit of the doubt and apologize for dignity violations. Listen in for insight around the technique of ‘getting up on the balcony’ to reflect on your behavior and pausing for 90 seconds before responding to a dignity violation.
    Topics Covered
    How Donna’s work with international conflict translates to families
    The universal desire to be treated as someone with value, worth
    How a dignity violation is the underlying cause of every conflict
    Donna’s insight around dignity as the aspiration that unites us all
    The concept of dignity in the framework of marriage
    How external pressures undermine our sense of dignity for our partners
    The idea of attribution error in the context of marriage
    The benefit of the doubt as an essential element of honoring dignity
    How the desire to get even is prompted by self-preservation instinct
    The technique of ‘getting up on the balcony’ to reflect on your behavior
    How the brain responds to dignity violations the same as physical harm
    The value in pausing for 90 seconds before responding to a violation
    The challenge of apologizing in spite of the instinct to eliminate a threat
    How to provide feedback about how you were hurt without returning harm
    Connect with Donna Hicks
    Donna’s Website: http://drdonnahicks.com/
    Declare Dignity: https://declaredignity.com/
    Resources
    Dignity: The Essential Role It Plays in Resolving Conflict by Donna Hicks: https://www.amazon.com/Dignity-Essential-Role-Resolving-Conflict/dp/0300188056
    Swimmy by Leo Lionni: https://www.amazon.com/Swimmy-Leo-Lionni/dp/0399555501
    Facing the Truth: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hxPseZEGMCI
    My Stroke of Insight: A Brain Scientist’s Personal Journey by Jill Bolte Taylor: https://www.amazon.com/My-Stroke-Insight-Scientists-Personal-ebook/dp/B0019IB0II
    Connect with Katherine Miller
    Connect with Katherine Miller
    The Center for Understanding Conflict: http://understandinginconflict.org/
    Miller Law Group: https://westchesterfamilylaw.com/
    Katherine on LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/kemiller1
    The New Yorker’s Guide to Collaborative Divorce by Katherine Miller: https://www.amazon.com/New-Yorkers-Guide-Collaborative-Divorce/dp/0692496246
    Call (914) 738-7765
    27 min
  • Dialogue on Divorce with Donna Hicks
    Katherine interviews Dr. Donna Hicks, an expert on the role dignity takes in conflict situations, about how two parties in conflict can maintain their own and respect each other's dignity in order to improve the quality of the disagreement.
    29 min
  • Substance Abuse and the Divorce Process Dr. Ray Griffin
    Substance abuse often plays a role in the divorce process, either as the catalyst for or the result of conflict in a relationship. How do you go about having your former partner evaluated to ensure their health and safety—and that of your children?
    Dr. Raymond Griffin has worked in the field of addiction and counseling for 37-plus years. He served as the president of the National Council on Alcoholism and Drug Dependence as well as founder and director of the Greenwich Center. Dr. Griffin has taken part in many collaborative divorce and mediation processes and performed a number of forensic evaluations for federal and state courts. He is also a frequent Continuing Legal Education lecturer and host of the radio show Changing Your Life.
    Today, Dr. Griffin joins Katherine to explain his role in determining the extent of substance abuse issues during the divorce process. He shares his take on the degrading nature of litigation and his preference for collaborative divorce. Dr. Griffin describes the evaluation process, how he delivers feedback to the divorcing family, and his goal around helping people become healthy, active parents. Listen in for Dr. Griffin’s insight on the need for awareness of alternative dispute resolution and learn how you can help family members struggling with substance abuse maintain a connection with their children.
    Topics Covered
    How substance abuse serves as both a catalyst for and result of divorce
    The safety issues associated with substance abuse and co-parenting
    Dr. Griffin’s role in determining the extent of substance abuse issues
    How substance abuse issues are used as a strategy in litigation
    Dr. Griffin’s take on the degrading nature of a litigious divorce
    When the collaborative process is appropriate for people with addiction issues
    Dr. Griffin’s evaluation process
    • Series of face-to-face interviews
    • Screening instruments, random testing
    The difference between ongoing and situational substance abuse problems
    How opioid abuse compares to alcoholism
    How the I-STOP program has curbed doctor shopping in New York State
    How Dr. Griffin delivers his feedback to the divorcing family
    Dr. Griffin’s goal of helping people get healthy and become active parents
    Why the divorce process tends to be faster and less antagonistic in Connecticut
    The need for awareness around alternative dispute resolution processes
    How to help a family member maintain a connection with their children
    Connect with Dr. Raymond Griffin
    NCADD Westchester: http://www.ncaddwestchester.org/
    Call (914) 949-8500
    Resources
    I-STOP: https://www.health.ny.gov/professionals/narcotic/prescription_monitoring/
    Connect with Katherine Miller
    The Center for Understanding Conflict: http://understandinginconflict.org/
    Miller Law Group: https://westchesterfamilylaw.com/
    Katherine on LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/kemiller1
    The New Yorker’s Guide to Collaborative Divorce by Katherine Miller: https://www.amazon.com/New-Yorkers-Guide-Collaborative-Divorce/dp/0692496246
    Call (914) 738-7765
    24 min
  • The Myths of Litigated Divorce & the Benefits of Mediation with Sam Margulies
    The parties in a litigated divorce spend years—and tens-of-thousands of dollars—preparing for a trial that is extremely unlikely to happen. This disconnect led to the development of mediation as an option, allowing divorcing couples to work toward settlement without spending unnecessary time and money in preparation for a trial that will never come to fruition. Are there other myths and misconceptions about the conventional litigation model? What are the benefits of mediation?
    Sam Margulies is one of the most experienced mediators in the country, having facilitated settlements in hundreds of civil disputes and approximately four thousand divorces since 1980. Sam also has 35 years of experience training divorce mediators and conducting civil mediation training programs. He has served as Director of the Institute for Dispute Resolution of the Seton Hall Law School and taught graduate courses in mediation at the University of North Carolina at Greensboro. Sam is also the author of three books on divorce and mediation: Getting Divorced Without Ruining Your Life, A Man’s Guide to Civilized Divorce, and Working with Divorcing Spouses.
    Today, Sam joins Katherine to discuss his experiences in the early days of mediation, explaining the impetus behind its development and the threat mediation posed to traditional litigators. He speaks to the public’s ignorance of settlement as the norm in divorce cases and the unnecessary cost of discovery in the conventional system. Listen in to understand why Sam recommends mediation as the first option for divorcing couples and learn how mediation seeks to create a system in which every family member can thrive.
    Topics Covered
    Sam’s experiences in the early days of mediation
    The impetus behind mediation as an option
    • Divorce cases prepared for trial
    • Vast majority settle out of court
    The Family Therapy Movement’s influence on mediation
    The significant resistance to mediation from traditional divorce litigators
    • Discussion around disbarment proceedings
    The lack of data re: the percentage of couples who divorce through mediation
    The ongoing negative sentiment litigators harbor toward mediation
    Why the public is woefully ignorant about settlement as the norm
    The unnecessary cost of discovery in the conventional system of divorce
    How bad faith breeds and grows during the discover process
    Why law is the only professional in which pessimism positively correlates with success
    Sam’s recommendation that couples look at mediation as their FIRST option
    How an understanding of settlement norms would lead to quicker resolution
    • Equitable distribution, alimony norms, child support guidelines
    Mediation’s objective to create a system in which every family member can thrive
    Connect with Sam Margulies
    Sam’s Website: https://sammargulies.com/
    Call (336) 669-3141
    Resources
    Getting Divorced Without Ruining Your Life by Sam Margulies: https://www.amazon.com/Getting-Divorced-Without-Ruining-Your/dp/B001PO68FG/ref=ntt_at_ep_dpi_1
    A Man’s Guide to Civilized Divorce by Sam Margulies: https://www.amazon.com/Mans-Guide-Civilized-Divorce-Little/dp/1579547990/ref=asap_bc?ie=UTF8
    Working with Divorcing Spouses: How to Help Clients Navigate the Emotional and Legal Minefield by Sam Margulies: https://www.amazon.com/Working-Divorcing-Spouses-Emotional-Minefield/dp/1593854811/ref=la_B001IO9QG6_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1526835943&sr=1-1
    How to Tell Your Spouse You Want a Divorce: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7B3Rughx5Ms
    Connect with Katherine Miller
    The Center for Understanding Conflict: http://understandinginconflict.org/
    Miller Law Group: https://westchesterfamilylaw.com/
    Katherine on LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/kemiller1
    The New Yorker’s Guide to Collaborative Divorce by Katherine Miller: https://www.amazon.com/New-Yorkers-Guide-Collaborative-Divorce/dp/0692496246
    Call (914) 738-7765
    25 min
  • A Community of Women Navigating Divorce with Elise Pettus
    ‘How you go through this forest determines, to great extent, who you are when you come out of it.’
    Getting divorced can feel a lot like being lost in the woods. And no matter how much information you have gathered from the experts, you probably still feel very much alone. What if there was a community of women making their way through that same forest that you could go to for support and guidance?
    Elise Pettus is the founder and Editorial Director of UNtied, an online and real-life community for women navigating separation and divorce. UNtied is a membership organization based in Brooklyn that hosts panels and workshops on a variety of topics, from hiring a lawyer to co-parenting to blending families. A graduate of Columbia Journalism School, Elise wrote on marriage, health and family for New York Magazine, Healthy Living, and the Huffington Post, among many others, before shifting her focus to UNtied full-time. UNtied currently boasts more than 1500 subscribers, and the organization prides itself on connecting divorcing women with the most experienced and competent professionals in the field.
    Today, Elise sits down with Katherine to explain why she created UNtied and how it serves as a support system for women navigating separation and divorce. She discusses her organization’s intent to spread the word regarding process choice and offers her insight on how to choose the right option for you and your family. Elise shares her take on the top concerns women have early in the divorce process, addressing the importance of making the first phone call to get educated about the process. Listen in for information on UNtied’s curated events and learn how—with the right support—the divorce process can help you identify who really you are and what you need out of life.
    Topics Covered
    How UNtied provides a community for women to connect with each other
    UNtied’s intent to provide its members with process choice options
    • Mediation, collaborative and litigation
    How to overcome ‘the fear of the first phone call’
    Elise’s take on the top two concerns of women early in the divorce process
    • Financial security
    • Safety, welfare of children
    Elise’s advice for people contemplating divorce
    • Get educated around choices
    • Avoid needless hostility
    Elise’s insight on choosing a process based on the relationship’s power dynamic
    How the collaborative process manages anger rather than ignoring it
    The topics of UNtied’s monthly panel evenings
    How divorce can be positive in the end if given the right support
    Connect with Elise Pettus
    UNtied: The Thinking Woman’s Divorce Resource: https://untied.net/
    UNtied on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/UntiedNYC/
    Connect with Katherine Miller
    The Center for Understanding Conflict: http://understandinginconflict.org/
    Miller Law Group: https://westchesterfamilylaw.com/
    Katherine on LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/kemiller1
    The New Yorker’s Guide to Collaborative Divorce by Katherine Miller: https://www.amazon.com/New-Yorkers-Guide-Collaborative-Divorce/dp/0692496246
    Call (914) 738-7765
    26 min
  • The Deep Process of Releasing Conflict in Divorce with Alexis Neely
    Alexis Neely was going through an adversarial divorce settlement process. One evening in a hotel room, the weight of the conflict landed on her, and she prayed that a higher power would show her the way to resolution. In that moment, a very clear voice inside said, “Ask him what he needs to be safe, and give it to him.” Initially, Alexis resisted. Would her ex-husband take advantage of her generosity? What if he asked for more than she had to give? Eventually, though, Alexis found the courage and posed the question…
    Today, Alexis is an estate and business planning attorney, a serial entrepreneur, and a single mom. After divorcing her husband in 2005, she went on to build a million-dollar law practice based on a new pricing model inspired in part by her experience with the settlement process. Alexis teaches her New Law Business Model to lawyers worldwide and supports entrepreneurs and small business owners in making legal, insurance, financial and tax decisions with their ‘eyes wide open.’ She and her ex-husband live together and co-parent their children amicably.
    On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Alexis sits down with Katherine to share her adversarial experience in the collaborative law paradigm and explains the need to align the attorney’s economic interests with the best interest of the client. She offers insight into the tendency for divorcing couples to shrink their earning power, discussing how her divorce settlement ultimately incentivized her to build a million-dollar business. Alexis describes situations in which divorcing couples sacrifice their children’s well-being for the sake of money and the benefit of finding a lawyer who is focused on more than just getting the largest possible settlement. Listen in to understand how letting go of conflict opens you up to something greater and learn how reaching a resolution freed Alexis to move forward in faith.
    Topics Covered
    How Alexis supports lawyers in using the legal system to reach resolutions
    Alexis’ experience with the collaborative law paradigm in her own divorce
    How Alexis resolved the conflict by asking what her ex-husband needed to feel safe
    The need to align the lawyer’s economic interests with the best interest of the client
    Why Alexis built a new pricing model for her estate and business planning practice
    How the divorce settlement incentivized Alexis to build a million-dollar business
    Alexis’ insight on the tendency for divorcing couple to shrink their earning power
    Finding a lawyer who is focused on the long-term implications of settlement decisions
    How divorcing couples often sacrifice their children’s well-being for money
    Alexis’ take on how resolving conflict frees your creativity
    How letting go of conflict with generosity opens you up to something greater
    The danger in listening to the Greek Chorus encouraging you to dig in and fight
    Connect with Alexis Neely
    Alexis’ Website: http://alexisneely.com/
    Resources
    Joy Film Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tuVCdo-ZaO8
    Connect with Katherine Miller
    The Center for Understanding Conflict: http://understandinginconflict.org/
    Miller Law Group: https://westchesterfamilylaw.com/
    Katherine on LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/kemiller1
    The New Yorker’s Guide to Collaborative Divorce by Katherine Miller: https://www.amazon.com/New-Yorkers-Guide-Collaborative-Divorce/dp/0692496246
    Call (914) 738-7765
    26 min
  • Understanding Parental Alienation with Charlie Jamison
    Parental alienation is a high-stakes game with serious, long-term consequences for the children involved. When a child is manipulated into showing unwarranted fear or hostility toward the targeted parent and used as a pawn in one parent’s agenda against the other, it alters their sense of reality and normalizes deceit in the context of relationships. What causes a parent to put their child in this position?
    Board Certified Marital and Family Law attorney Charles Jamieson has been protecting parental and family rights for the past 37 years. As lead legal consultant to individuals with divorce issues in more than 20 states, Mr. Jamieson has developed a wealth of experience in the field of family law services and collaborative family law, and he is respected among child support lawyers, domestic violence attorneys, and divorce attorneys alike in his home state of Florida.
    Today, Charlie sits down with Katherine to discuss the spectrum of parental alienation, explaining why cases of extreme alienation are difficult to treat with traditional therapy. He shares case studies of extreme parental alienation and describes how the practice impacts the child long-term. Charlie makes the distinction between estrangement and alienation, offering insight around how to identify when a child is being programmed. Listen in to understand why children will lie to earn the victor parent’s approval and get Charlie’s advice on what to do if you are the target of mild alienation.
    Topics Covered
    The definition of parental alienation
    Why extreme alienation is difficult to treat with traditional therapy
    Case studies of extreme parental alienation
    How parental alienation alters a child’s fundamental sense of reality
    How to identify when a child is being programmed by the alienating parent
    The idea of frivolous rationalizations (i.e.: I don’t feel safe because Dad yells)
    The distinction between estrangement and alienation
    How brittle parenting can be remedied with coaching, therapy
    The concept of alignment with a divorcing parent
    How escalating tensions in litigation can lead to baseless abuse allegations
    Why children will lie to earn the approval of the victor parent
    How spending time with your children serves as the antidote to alienation
    Connect with Charlie Jamieson
    Charles Jamieson Law: https://www.cjamiesonlaw.com/
    Call (561) 478-0312
    Connect with Katherine Miller
    The Center for Understanding Conflict: http://understandinginconflict.org/
    Miller Law Group: https://westchesterfamilylaw.com/
    Katherine on LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/kemiller1
    The New Yorker’s Guide to Collaborative Divorce by Katherine Miller: https://www.amazon.com/New-Yorkers-Guide-Collaborative-Divorce/dp/0692496246
    Call (914) 738-7765
    26 min
  • Prenuptial Agreements: A Framework for Conflict-Resolution with Mindy Utay
    ‘We are emotionally wired to avoid conflict. People sometimes have to be forced to—or have to be encouraged or coached to—and the prenup provides that opportunity because you really do have to sit down, roll up your sleeves, and start talking about what’s important to you.’
    Mindy Utay is a psychotherapist in practice on Manhattan’s Upper East Side. Her background in the law, social work, and psychoanalysis allows Mindy to support couples and families in identifying and resolving conflicts with courage and optimism. She is a coveted relationship expert and speaker on the topics of relationship conflicts, marriage, and parenting, and Mindy is a regular columnist for the Huffington Post.
    Today, Mindy sits down with Katherine to offer insight around the contradiction of prenuptial agreements, explaining why it’s so challenging to consider the end of a relationship at the very beginning. She discusses the problems associated with the ‘moneyed spouse’ approaching a lawyer alone and shares her alternative approach to introducing the prenup within the larger context of the couple’s relationship. Listen in to understand the benefits of creating a prenuptial agreement and learn how the process can provide couples with a framework for conflict-resolution.
    Topics Covered
    Mindy’s insight on the contradiction of prenuptial agreements
    The challenge around considering the end of a relationship at the very beginning
    The benefits of establishing a prenuptial agreement
    • Plan in time when feel connected
    • Communicate about important issues
    • Framework for resolving conflict
    The problems associated with the typical process of lawyers writing, emailing drafts
    The value of discussing the prenup within the context of the relationship
    Mindy’s relationship-as-foundation approach to discussing prenuptial agreements
    How to create a safe environment and establish intimacy while discussing a prenup
    Mindy’s take on our resistance to discussing the possibility of death
    Why timing and tone are the most important factors in introducing a prenup
    Connect with Mindy Utay
    Mindy’s Website: http://www.mindyutay.com/
    Call (212) 744-6057
    Resources
    92Y: https://www.92y.org/
    Connect with Katherine Miller
    The Center for Understanding Conflict: http://understandinginconflict.org/
    Miller Law Group: https://westchesterfamilylaw.com/
    Katherine on LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/kemiller1
    The New Yorker’s Guide to Collaborative Divorce by Katherine Miller: https://www.amazon.com/New-Yorkers-Guide-Collaborative-Divorce/dp/0692496246
    Call (914) 738-7765
    26 min
  • Allegations of Child Abuse and Neglect During Divorce with Allison Williams
    When emotions are running high in the divorce process, it is not uncommon for people to amplify their concerns over an ex-spouse’s ability to parent. In some cases, those concerns might lead to allegations of child abuse and neglect. What is the right course of action when you suspect an ex-spouse of substance abuse or mental health issues? What can you do to ensure the health and safety of your children without overreacting? What happens once Child Protective Services gets involved?
    Allison Williams is the founder and owner of Williams Law Group, a practice focused exclusively on matrimonial and family law with an emphasis on complex child welfare matters. An established leader in the field of child welfare law, Allison has appeared on several media outlets including Katie, News 12 New Jersey and Chasing News, and she lectures regularly for professional organizations like the Institute for Continuing Legal Education. In 2017, she was recognized as a New Jersey Super Lawyer for the fourth consecutive year.
    Today, Allison sits down with Katherine to define child abuse and neglect, the two categories of child welfare addressed in the Adoption & Safe Families Act. She explains the legal risk associated with failing to ensure your child’s safety when they are in the care of an ex-spouse—specifically in cases where substance abuse or mental health issues are present. Allison walks us through the CPS investigation process, offering insight around how the circumstances of divorce may influence a case worker’s assessment of an allegation’s credibility. Listen in to understand why CPS has a statutory responsibility to reach a conclusion once a case has been opened and learn what to expect once the process is set in motion.
    Topics Covered
    The two categories of child welfare addressed in the Adoption & Safe Families Act
    • Physical, sexual abuse
    • Neglect
    Divorced parents with substance abuse/mental health issues who lack safeguards
    The legal risk involved in not taking a firm stance on an ex-spouse’s ability to parent
    The Child Protective Services investigation process
    • Initial assessment within 48 hours
    • 60 days to make determination
    The three CPS designations in substantiated cases
    • Actual harm, imminent risk and substantial risk
    Why case workers consider divorce in assessing the credibility of allegations
    Why divorce is not considered in cases of alleged sexual abuse
    CPS’s statutory responsibility to reach a conclusion once a case is opened
    Why a divorcing parent who contacted CPS has no authority to withdraw their case
    The collateral contacts who may be interviewed by case workers in an investigation
    The confidential nature of CPS records
    Connect with Allison Williams
    Williams Law Group: https://familylawyersnewjersey.com/
    Call (908) 810-1083
    Resources
    The Adoption and Safe Families Act: https://www.congress.gov/105/plaws/publ89/PLAW-105publ89.pdf
    Connect with Katherine Miller
    The Center for Understanding Conflict: http://understandinginconflict.org/
    Miller Law Group: https://westchesterfamilylaw.com/
    Katherine on LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/kemiller1
    The New Yorker’s Guide to Collaborative Divorce by Katherine Miller: https://www.amazon.com/New-Yorkers-Guide-Collaborative-Divorce/dp/0692496246
    Call (914) 738-7765
    26 min

About Divorce Dialogues

From the publisher's feed

Divorce Dialogues helps people navigate divorce with dignity, clarity, and perspective. Through thoughtful conversations with experts and practitioners, the show explores the emotional, financial, legal, and relational realities of divorce, so listeners can make better decisions, communicate more effectively, and move forward with greater confidence.