Divorce Source Radio

Divorce is an extremely emotional time in our life and under stress, we don't always make the right choices.

The legal system is confusing and frightening and we sometimes let our anger get the best of us creating a battle with our soon to be ex that can last a lifetime and affect the lives of our children and our finances.

In this episode, DSR host Steve Peck, speaks with Divorce Consultant and author of The Smart Divorce, Deborah Moskovitch on how to avoid costly mistakes during divorce.

Listening to this show if you are new to the process of divorce can save you thousands of dollars in legal expenses, the relationship with your children and your sanity. Visit www.DivorceSourceRadio.com for more free resources.

When a divorce becomes confrontational and spirals out of control, it's known as a high conflict divorce.

In a high conflict divorce, a war is created that is costly and damaging to the children and the divorcing couples. In fact the damage they wreak spreads a wide net into their extended families and friends, and sometimes even into the greater community. In the long run this couple pays the price because they may never be able to restore their lives to healthy functioning.

It's best to do everything in your power to avoid entering into a high conflict divorce and in this program, Psychologist, Dr. Larry Friedberg helps us better understand the signs of this type of negative divorce so that we might avoid the pitfalls and costly legal battles. We’ll also discover how poor communication skills and narcissistic personality disorders can fuel the flame of a high conflict divorce.

In episode #2 of Beyond Divorce with Susan Pease Gadoua, we discuss finding a "New Normal" after your divorce.

Settling in with a "New Normal" post divorce can seem impossible but it will eventually happen for those who put the effort into making it happen. The impact of divorce on your life is like throwing a large rock into a pond: there are lots of ripples and it takes a while for things to settle down again.

Topics covered are:

• Understanding the three main areas of transition people experience during and after divorce
• Having realistic expectations about how long it should take to find a new normal
• What you can do if you think you should be feeling better but you're not
• Staying open to the new normal not being anywhere near what you thought it would be (it's usually better!)

In this Best of DSR episode of "Ask Henry", attorney Henry Gornbein, answers the question, "Do I have to pay spousal support?" (Also known as alimony) He also answers the follow-up question, "What's the difference between modifiable and non-modifiable spousal support?"

If you are a woman what could prohibit you from receiving spousal support of even have to pay it to your ex.

Dealing with child custody and visitation is one of the most difficult aspects of getting divorced. Divorce and child custody cases are often sensitive and emotional matters.

In this program, we’ll discuss The different types of child custody, child support, and visitation. Divorce Source Radio legal correspondent, Henry Gornbein, explains how you can step back from your anger and do what’s in the best interest of your children. Henry also emphasizes not wasting your financial resources through unnecessary litigation.

Henry explains how to have a “game-plan” and provides a step-by-step guide to prepare you for your divorce and child custody case. This is a very important program for anyone divorcing with children. Visit www.DivorceSourceRadio.com for more information.

In this episode of Divorce Source Radio, our guest, Suzy Bricker, discusses how dealing with her divorce was actually harder than dealing with her cancer.

Eight year ago, Suzy discovered she had cancer and began a journey to regain her health. After two years of recovery, and dealing with her troubled marriage, Suzy came to the realization that she had to leave her long-term marriage in order to save her life.

Suzy offers advice to women going through divorce, regardless of their age and explains that with the right mindset, a healthy and happier you awaits at the journey's end.

Topics in the program include:

• How to deal with the loss of a spouse during tough times
• Reinventing yourself after divorce
• Dealing with loneliness
• Steps to attain independence
• Letting go of anger and acceptance of your new reality
• And much more

Our guest, Joan Kelly PhD., a Clinical Psychologist, is an internationally recognized expert on divorce and children’s adjustment and interventions designed to assist parents and enhance resiliency in children. Dr. Kelly has been studying the impact of divorce on children since 1968. She is an author, therapist, mediator, and parenting coordinator with four decades of experience working with high conflict parents who are separating.

Dr. Kelly shares her insights and wisdom on telling your children about your divorce-- providing script ideas and important messages. She will guide you through the conversation and preparation you need to do. Having this conversation is not one most parents want to have, as only 5% of parents actually sit down and explain to their children about this significant change in their life. Yet, telling your children about separation and divorce is critical if you truly want to do what is in your children’s best interest, and minimize the negative effects of divorce on children.

To obtain more information on talking about separation and divorce and to purchase Dr. Kelly’s booklet: What Should We Tell the Children, written for the Association of American Matrimonial Lawyers contact www.aaml.org

Topics in this program include:

• Why is it so important to talk with your children at this time
• Why do parents find it so difficult to talk with their children?
• Preparing to talk with your children about the separation
• What to say to your children and how do you say it?
• What to say to your children about why you are separating

From the "Best of DSR" series comes Co-Parenting Peacefully for Your Children. This has been one of the most listened to programs on DSR.

If you’ve decided to separate or get a divorce and have children, your next important decision should be about co-parenting. Divorce may be the end of a marriage, but it is not the end of the family. People who separate but continue to work cooperatively as parents give their children the best chances for a smooth adjustment to living in two separate households and continued growth.

Psychologist, Dr. Larry Friedberg shows us ways to communicate with your ex without hostility for the good of your children.

Learn how to:

• Be respectful of your ex spouse.
• Resolve conflicts and discuss major issues privately, not in front of the children.
• Not confide, complain or grumble about your ex to your kids – you need family, friends or a therapist for that role.
• Not use our kids as messengers between you and the other parent.
• Assure our kids that both parents will listen to feelings and address needs cooperatively.

So you think divorce in America is difficult? Well, believe it or not, divorce in other countries is even more challenging than in the States.

In this program, Steve Peck speaks with Liz, from Ireland, who explains how difficult divorce is in her country. Liz speaks with first-hand experience, as she just recently received her divorce, seven years after filing.

In Ireland, women are at a tremendous disadvantage, as spousal support is rarely provided by the courts, leaving women to fend for themselves. Divorce Source Radio legal correspondent, Henry Gornbein, joins us as we explore the vast differences in our legal systems.

Debate may never resolve whether fault based marital conduct codes once were a positive force for stability in marriage, or solely the focus of ever greater contentiousness in divorce process. One thing is certain. They are gone. Their vestiges may remain on the face of a few statutes in some states, but their force in law is no more.

Yet, marital conduct codes expressed in terms of grounds or fault were inarguably important in at least one sense. The very existence of these legally enforceable standards mitigated the risk of investing in marriage. Compliance with those minimum standards ensured that marriage would be protected by law, that the investment in marriage would be secure. Conversely no fault in its essence is a system without standards, a code without relation to conduct. Unavoidably, the process it spawned left marriage without protection. In eliminating the problems of fault based divorce, the good was thrown out with the bad, the baby with the bath water.

Divorce happens to good spouses because the rules of marriage changed; more appropriately speaking, the rules were thrown out. As such, marriage today is sacrificed on the altar of expediency in a court process that simply finds it more efficient to divorce people than to examine the merits of marital commitment. In exchange for less stress in court, we have more injustice for marriage. This is by design. Divorce happens to good spouses because the law no longer cares to distinguish between right and wrong, good and bad in marriage. - Kevin Senich

In this episode, Attorney Kevin Senich discusses no-fault divorce, divorce reform and the need for education as a means of keeping the family unit together.