Do Yourself a Favour

Tam Callaghan sits down with her friend and former colleague Kate Fandry for a wide-ranging, deeply honest conversation about late ADHD diagnosis, what it actually feels like to finally have an explanation for a lifetime of experiences, and how Kate is channelling everything she's learned into a brand new career as a celebrant. 

Kate was diagnosed with ADHD, OCD, and as a Highly Sensitive Person after an epic burnout that had been building for years. In this first part they cover what the signs looked like in childhood, how hyperactivity presents differently in girls, what Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria actually feels like day to day, how to manage sensitivity without shutting yourself down, and why so many neurodiverse people are drawn to each other. 

They also get into managing news consumption, parenting a sensitive child, environmental sensitivities, and the pivotal moments that led Kate to retrain as a celebrant. 

Warm, funny, and genuinely eye-opening whether you have a diagnosis or simply recognise yourself in parts of what Kate describes. 

Part 2: Breaking the Lid: Grief, Neurodiversity, and Finding Self-Love - https://www.podbean.com/eas/pb-67tnf-1b5447d

In this episode: 

Do Yourself a Favour is available on YouTube: https://linktr.ee/doyourselfafavour_podcast 

——————— 

0:00 Introduction — Guest & Topics (Late-diagnosis ADHD, New Career) 

0:29 Welcome Back & Guest Intro 

0:50 Late Diagnosis vs Late Onset — Clarifying Terms 

1:30 How We Met & Early Connection 

2:09 Being Drawn to Neurodiverse People 

2:27 Burnout That Led to Diagnosis 

3:11 Childhood Signs — Talking & Family 

4:28 ADHD Presentation in Girls (Inattentive & Hyperactive) 

5:03 Coping Strategies (Fidgeting, 'Bathroom' Breaks) 

5:58 Childhood Struggle — Sitting for an Artist 

7:30 Sensitivity, Self-Esteem & Generational Views 

8:19 Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD) — What It Feels Like 

10:11 Examples of RSD in Daily Work Life 

11:59 Managing Sensitivity — Boundaries & Self-Love 

14:08 Emotional Reactivity — Public Incident Example 

16:01 Parenting & Recognising Sensitivity in Children 

18:20 Online Harassment, Keyboard Warriors & Vulnerability 

23:02 Environmental Sensitivities (Lighting, Noise, Smell) 

24:09 Assessment — ADHD, OCD & Highly Sensitive Person 

26:04 'Porous' Feeling & Managing News Consumption 

28:59 Media Diet — Choosing What to Consume for Wellbeing 

31:26 Keeping Up With Pop Culture & Parenting Relevance 

34:10 Self-Awareness & Emotional Intelligence (Wisdom) 

38:26 Becoming a Celebrant — New Career & Fit 

41:04 Choosing a Business Name — Reactions & Rationale 

45:51 Registration Process & Launch Timing 

49:09 Career Path, Pivotal Moments & Car Accident Story 

55:57 Fuzzy Visioning — Future Planning for ADHD Brains 

1:00:02 ADHD Strengths, Empathy & Closing Thoughts 

1:03:37 Closing Anecdote & End 

——————— 

#KateFandry #TamCallaghan #DoYourselfAFavour #ADHD #LateADHDDiagnosis #RejectionSensitiveDysphoria #RSD #HighlySensitivePerson #Neurodiversity #OCD #ADHDWomen #SensitivityAsStrength #MentalHealth #PodcastAustralia #ADHDStrengths 

Part two gets practical. In this episode Tam Callaghan walks through the gratitude practices she actually uses, including a twist on the classic three-things exercise that most people miss, and why acknowledging your own role in creating the good in your life is just as important as noticing it. 

She shares two personal examples, choosing Luna the dog after a year of persistence, and saying yes to her dream treehouse, as illustrations of what it looks like to own your wins rather than just feel lucky. She also gets into hedonic adaptation and why we stop enjoying what we've worked hard for, the Metta loving-kindness practice, and a striking story about a business success that was missed entirely because the moment wasn't absorbed. 

One practical exercise to do tonight, and a genuine argument for why you're probably already living the life you once prayed for. 

Part 1: Gratitude: The Backwards Path to More Joy - https://www.podbean.com/eas/pb-j483f-1b1ade5

In this episode: 

Do Yourself a Favour is available on YouTube: https://linktr.ee/doyourselfafavour_podcast 

——————— 

0:00 Introduction: Gratitude Practice 

0:07 Writing Three Gratitudes & Practice Tips 

0:59 Reflect on Your Role in Creating Good 

1:22 Story: Choosing Luna (Dog) 

2:26 Gratitude for Home: The Treehouse 

2:52 Self-Kindness & Reset Practices 

4:14 Appreciating Yourself and Giving Compliments 

5:19 Metta (Loving-Kindness) Practice 

6:13 Online Cruelty: Ego vs Heart 

7:23 Hedonic Adaptation & Enjoying Achievements 

8:42 You Are Living the Life You Prayed For 

9:17 Business Success Story & Missing the Moment 

11:13 Practical Takeaway: Gratitude Exercise Tonight 

12:02 Closing: Like, Subscribe & See More 

——————— 

#TamCallaghan #DoYourselfAFavour #Gratitude #GratitudePractice #SelfKindness #LovingKindness #Metta #HedonicAdaptation #PersonalGrowth #Mindset #SelfCompassion #PodcastAustralia #PositivePsychology #AbundanceMindset #YouAreEnough 

Tam sits down with her friend and colleague Kate de Jong to talk about Kate's upcoming book, The Wisdumb Way: A Simple Path to Emotional Intelligence Through the Power of Paradox, co-written with EQ expert James Brydon and relationship counsellor Mauro Davide. 

The conversation starts with a statistic that is hard to shake: 95% of people think they're self-aware, but research suggests only 10 to 15% actually are. Kate calls the rare few who genuinely develop this skill unicorns, borrowing the term from Dr Tasha Eurich, and The Wisdumb Way is her attempt to help more people get there. 

They cover what self-awareness actually means (internal and external), the difference between genuine emotional intelligence and spiritual bypassing, the Dunning-Kruger effect and Mount Stupid, and the three core qualities at the heart of the book: curiosity, vulnerability, and comfort with uncertainty. Kate also walks through the Harrison Assessment's 12 paradox scales and why being extreme in any direction creates its own problems. 

Warm, wide-ranging, and genuinely useful for anyone who wants to lead better, parent better, or simply understand themselves more clearly. 

In this episode: 

The Wisdumb Way by Kate de Jong, James Brydon and Mauro Davide: [link when available] 

Do Yourself a Favour is available on YouTube: https://linktr.ee/doyourselfafavour_podcast 

——————— 

0:00 Intro — Kate's teaser for The Wisdumb Way 

0:35 Podcast welcome and conversation setup 

0:46 Book title, subtitle and co-authors 

3:03 Kate's backstory: passion for self-awareness 

3:25 Shocking self-awareness statistic (unicorns) 

5:08 Internal vs external self-awareness explained 

5:15 360/LSI feedback — Kate's eye-opening story 

7:25 Responding to feedback: defensiveness or curiosity 

8:01 Why emotional intelligence matters (benefits) 

9:19 Parenting, patterns and avoiding damage 

11:07 Spiritual bypassing and doing the inner work 

14:49 Mount Stupid & the Dunning-Kruger effect 

16:15 Introducing wisdumb as paradox (wise & dumb) 

19:21 Confidence + humility — the beginner's mind 

21:03 Harrison assessment and the 12 paradox scales 

22:08 Flip behaviours: risks of being extreme on a scale 

27:12 The Wisdumb Way: three core qualities — intro 

27:26 Curiosity — the first core quality 

31:46 Vulnerability — strength, not weakness 

33:47 Comfort with uncertainty (faith/trust/surrender) 

36:22 James's intuition/love story — transformation 

38:41 Applying the three qualities in conversations 

45:21 Costs of lacking self-awareness & book purpose 

56:18 Book format, exercises and launch details 

1:01:39 Closing 

——————— 

#KateDeJong #TheWisdumbWay #TamCallaghan #DoYourselfAFavour #SelfAwareness #EmotionalIntelligence #PersonalGrowth #DunningKruger #Vulnerability #Curiosity #LeadershipDevelopment #InnerWork #PodcastAustralia #EQ #Wisdumb 

Tam Callaghan knows you've heard the word gratitude too many times. She felt the same way. This episode is her making the case that it's worth pushing through that resistance, and explaining why it actually works, not in a spiritual bypassing way, but in a genuinely practical, neurological, life-changing way. 

Drawing on Shawn Achor's research, Rick Hanson's work on absorbing positive experiences, her own VIA character strengths results, and a striking personal story about manifestation, Tam walks through three reasons gratitude matters, why most of us have the order backwards, and what it looks like to build gratitude as a daily practice rather than a mood or a mindset. 

This is part one of two. Part two goes into the practices in more depth. 

Part 2: How Gratitude Transforms Your Life - https://www.podbean.com/eas/pb-5r8in-1b1adf9

In this episode: 

Do Yourself a Favour is available on YouTube: https://linktr.ee/doyourselfafavour_podcast 

——————— 

0:00 Introduction — Gratitude: one of life's great ironies 

0:03 Gratitude as a buzzword — eye-rolling and resistance 

0:46 Why gratitude matters — it's simple and quick 

0:55 Influences — Shawn Achor and the VIA strengths 

1:41 My VIA results — gratitude, beauty, love 

2:43 How gratitude changes your brain and experience 

3:12 Three reasons gratitude matters 

3:38 Gratitude creates the life you want — life works backwards 

4:30 Evidence and belief — placebo, Shawn Achor, personal examples 

5:12 A story of manifestation — contacting a well-known figure 

6:22 Caveats — not The Secret; not denying hardship 

8:58 Abundance mindset — upward spiral and thermostats 

10:54 Reverse effects — baby story and doing things backwards 

11:48 Gratitude fuels creativity, relationships, and joy 

12:02 Family roots of gratitude 

13:01 Gratitude as a muscle and moral choice 

13:50 Everyday practice — noticing tea, trees, dog, light 

15:48 Absorbing positive experiences — Rick Hanson's advice 

16:30 Closing — focusing on the good and practising gratitude 

——————— 

#TamCallaghan #DoYourselfAFavour #Gratitude #ShawnAchor #RickHanson #VIAStrengths #PositivePsychology #PersonalGrowth #AbundanceMindset #Mindset #Manifestation #PodcastAustralia #GratitudePractice #MentalWellness #JoyfulLiving 

In part two of their conversation on workplace bullying, Tam Callaghan and Tanya Hallett from TIPT get into the harder question: once you know there's a problem, what do you actually do? 

They pick up where part one left off, starting with the 'money in the bank' concept and why goodwill built before a crisis is the thing that makes everything else possible. From there they move into what happens when a harmful employee has been left unmanaged for years, how fawning and placating responses develop in teams that have never seen anyone held accountable, and what a genuine team reset looks like when a new manager comes in. 

Tanya walks through a detailed case study, a respectful behaviours charter in practice, how to document incidents properly, and how to use company values and policy as the foundation for enforcing standards. There's also a rich conversation about generational change, what younger workers expect from their managers, and why seeing potential in people is one of the most powerful performance tools available. 

Practical, experienced, and exactly what organisations need more of. 

Part 1: What is Workplace Bullying - https://www.podbean.com/eas/pb-xccpv-1b0fd3c

Part 3: Narcissistic Bullies - https://www.podbean.com/eas/pb-arzzg-1af7f01 

In this episode: 

Do Yourself a Favour is available on YouTube: https://linktr.ee/doyourselfafavour_podcast 

Join the conversation! Do Yourself a Favour is on Facebook LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/tamaracallaghan/ 

Do Yourself a Favour is recorded at Tailwind Studio: https://www.linkedin.com/company/tailwind-studio 

Formerly known as the 50/50 Podcast. 

——————— 

Chapters 

0:00 Intro — 'Money in the Bank' classroom management concept 

0:37 Applying 'money in the bank' in workplaces 

1:14 Staff treated like children — effects on behaviour 

1:34 Unmanaged harmful employee — long-term impact 

2:32 Psychological safety: boundaries and accountability 

3:37 Fairness and pillars of psychological safety 

5:57 Bullying dynamics: placating and fawning 

7:29 Fawning as a trauma/survival response 

9:09 Case study: Bill and new manager Bob 

11:17 Team intervention: respectful behaviours charter 

14:02 Documenting incidents: warnings & evidence 

15:33 Using company values and policy to enforce standards 

19:08 Restart norms: new manager reset 

22:04 Third-space conversation tools (Lego Serious Play) 

23:56 Addressing unseen behaviours and communication 

29:02 Generational change: self-care, responsibility & consequences 

32:06 Look after people: productivity and retention 

34:09 Expect the best: transform performance by seeing potential 

——————— 

#TanyaHallett #TIPT #TamCallaghan #DoYourselfAFavour #WorkplaceBullying #PsychologicalSafety #TraumaInformed #WorkplaceWellbeing #Fawning #Leadership #HRPodcast #Accountability #WorkplaceCulture #LegoSeriousPlay #PodcastAustralia 

Workplace bullying pt 2: https://www.podbean.com/eas/pb-krwy4-1b1acb6

Narcissistic Bullies: https://www.podbean.com/eas/pb-arzzg-1af7f01

Tanya Hallett from TIPT returns to talk about workplace bullying, one of the most common and costly issues she deals with, and one of the most misunderstood. In this first of two conversations, Tam and Tanya cover what bullying actually looks like in practice, what it isn't, and what organisations are getting badly wrong.

They get into the pattern Tanya sees most: a long-serving employee, a new manager with no contextual understanding, a clash that escalates fast, and a workplace that fails to step in. They also cover the legal obligations organisations have around reasonable adjustments and psychosocial safety, and why ignorance is genuinely no excuse.

There's a detailed case study on an employee with vertigo, a clear breakdown of the difference between bullying and performance management, and practical discussion of what quick and effective resolution can actually look like, including why trust built before a crisis is the thing that makes everything else easier.

In this episode:

Do Yourself a Favour is available on YouTube: https://linktr.ee/doyourselfafavour_podcast

———————

0:00 Introduction and guest bio

0:25 Welcome back & light banter

0:58 Topic overview: workplace bullying

1:05 Client stories: common themes

1:25 Lack of workplace support & consequences

2:31 New managers disrupting status quo

4:11 Legal obligations: 'ignorance is no excuse'

6:06 Bullying vs performance management

7:06 Case study: employee with vertigo

10:05 Need for workplace & mental health support plans

13:00 Trust, EI and trauma-informed leadership

18:01 Quick resolution: apology, documentation, plans

23:02 HR and WHS: overlapping responsibilities

29:14 When to call in a specialist / upskilling

33:03 Consequences of psychological injury (costs/time)

36:26 Money-in-the-bank analogy: building goodwill

40:24 Next topic teaser: the 'naughty' staff member / wrap-up

———————

#TanyaHallett #TIPT #TamCallaghan #DoYourselfAFavour #WorkplaceBullying #PsychologicalSafety #TraumaInformed #WorkplaceWellbeing #Leadership #HRPodcast #PsychosocialSafety #FairWork #ManagerTraining #WorkplaceCulture #PodcastAustralia

Tam Callaghan had a realisation that made her feel a bit silly at first, and then completely changed how she understood her own anxiety. She was choosing it. Not consciously, but choosing it all the same. 

In this episode she unpacks the idea that anxiety can sometimes be a way of avoiding responsibility for choices we've made, and why staying in worry feels safer than sitting with the discomfort of ownership. She also gets honest about using worry as a hobby, what happens creatively when she chooses action instead, and why compassion for yourself and others is the piece that makes the whole thing actually work. 

In this episode: 

Do Yourself a Favour is available on YouTube: https://linktr.ee/doyourselfafavour_podcast 

——————— 

0:00 Intro & what to expect 

0:17 A surprising realisation 

0:46 The Upside Down — choosing anxiety 

0:58 My history with anxiety 

1:52 Noticing I was choosing anxiety 

2:40 Example: training and responsibility 

3:36 Which pain do you choose? 

5:05 I worry as a hobby 

7:02 Unlocking creativity — choosing action over worry 

9:35 Addendum: compassion & Stephan Bodian 

10:02 Trauma, habits, and automatic reactions 

11:42 Drama, externalising pain, and compassion 

13:01 Conclusion: be bravely loving to yourself 

——————— 

#TamCallaghan #DoYourselfAFavour #Anxiety #Worry #PersonalGrowth #MindsetShift #InnerWork #SelfCompassion #Responsibility #MarkManson #WhichPainDoYouChoose #PodcastAustralia #MentalWellness #Creativity #BravelyLoving

Tam Callaghan did the brave thing. She wrote the letter, had the hard conversation, cleared up a long-standing issue with someone important to her, and got the resolution she'd hoped for. And then she waited to feel great. 

It didn't quite work out that way. 

In this episode Tam shares what actually happened in the days after a genuine breakthrough, including the unexpected ego backlash, the self-doubt that crept in, and why healing doesn't always feel like healing in the moment. She also talks through the identity protections and parts that fire up when we grow, why discomfort after doing the right thing is normal, and what a quote from Chris Lapping about failure helped her see differently. 

Raw, honest, and one of the more useful things Tam has recorded about the messy reality of doing inner work. 

In this episode: 

Do Yourself a Favour is available on YouTube: https://linktr.ee/doyourselfafavour_podcast 

Join the conversation! Do Yourself a Favour is on Facebook LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/tamaracallaghan/ 

Do Yourself a Favour is recorded at Tailwind Studio: https://www.linkedin.com/company/tailwind-studio 

Formerly known as the 50/50 Podcast. 

——————— 

Chapters 

0:00 Expectation vs Reality: Why I Didn't Feel Better 

0:27 Owning a Mistake: Repairing a Friendship 

1:41 The Big Kahuna: A Difficult Relationship Story 

3:15 Writing and Sending the Letter (with coaching) 

3:58 The Conversation: Confusion, Apology and Relief 

6:03 Unexpected Backlash: Feeling Worse After Success 

6:30 Identity & Ego: Why Parts Fight Change 

9:06 On Failure and Transition (Chris Lapping Quote) 

10:52 Post-Recording Update: The Full Story 

15:44 Takeaways: Self-Love, Discomfort, and What's Next 

16:17 Closing & Call to Action 

——————— 

#TamCallaghan #DoYourselfAFavour #InnerWork #SelfLove #Healing #Courage #PersonalGrowth #IdentityParts #Authenticity #Vulnerability #BraveConversations #Mindset #PodcastAustralia #EmotionalHealth #DoTheWork

They're charming to leadership, devastating to their team, and almost impossible to catch. In this episode, Tam Callaghan sits down with workplace expert Tanya Hallett to talk about narcissistic bullies at work: what they actually are, why organisations keep missing them, and what to do if you're dealing with one. 

Tanya breaks down the key difference between a standard workplace bully and a narcissistic one, why the second category is in a completely different league, and how the DAVO pattern (Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim Order) leaves targets confused, doubting themselves, and unable to articulate what just happened. She also covers what gaslighting actually looks like on the ground, why documentation matters more than you think, and what your real options are if you're in the middle of this. 

This is one of the most practically useful episodes on workplace harm the show has done. Whether you're a leader trying to understand what's happening in your team, or someone trying to survive a difficult situation, this conversation gives you real tools. 

In this episode: 

Do Yourself a Favour is available on YouTube: https://linktr.ee/doyourselfafavour_podcast 

Join the conversation! Do Yourself a Favour is on Facebook LinkedIn: https//www.linkedin.com/in/tamaracallaghan/ 

Do Yourself a Favour is recorded at Tailwind Studio: https://www.linkedin.com/company/tailwind-studio 

Formerly known as the 50/50 Podcast. 

——————— 

Chapters 

0:00 Intro 

0:09 What People Mean by 'Narcissistic Bully' 

1:06 Trail of Destruction: Team Impact 

3:14 Core Traits: Fragile Ego, Charisma, Managing Up 

5:34 Why Leaders Miss Narcissistic Bullies (Red Flags) 

6:42 DAVO: Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim Order Explained 

9:11 Gaslighting Effects: Confidence & Psychological Safety 

11:01 What Leaders Should Watch For (Patterns & Evidence) 

15:33 Think Like a Lawyer: Building Your Evidence 

19:21 Documentation: How to Record Incidents Safely 

20:57 Limit Verbal Contact & Use Written Follow-ups 

24:08 Maintain Professionalism — Don't Stoop Down 

26:40 Compassion as a Coping Tool (Perspective) 

29:00 The 'Ick' Factor: Confusion After Interactions 

31:26 Manager Responses & Possible Outcomes 

33:58 Options for Targets: Cope, Escalate, or Exit 

36:28 Cost to Organisations & Leadership Accountability 

39:34 Closing Remarks & Thanks 

——————— 

#NarcissisticBully #TanyaHallett #TamCallaghan #DoYourselfAFavour #WorkplaceBullying #PsychologicalSafety #Gaslighting #WorkplaceWellbeing #DAVO #Leadership #HRPodcast #WorkplaceCulture #Narcissism #SelfProtection #PodcastAustralia 

Do you want to be Bette or Barbara? If you know the movie Beaches, you know the question. Bette Midler's character is the star, the one in the spotlight. Barbara Hershey's is quieter, less visible, deeply loving and deeply loved. In this episode, Tam Callaghan has been wrestling with which one she wants to be, and the answer surprised her. 

For most of her life Tam's ego has measured her worth through achievement, recognition and applause. But after reading a post about kindness and sitting with what she's contributed over the last 20 or 30 years, she had a genuinely softening realisation: she's been far more Barbara than she ever gave herself credit for. 

This episode also covers the backup singer dream, the difference between creating from ego and creating from joy, and why peace and self-love aren't distractions from the mission. They are the mission. Plus, a practical exercise worth doing – Writing a list of 50 things you've done well since the start of the year, split across what you've achieved and what you've done for others. 

Warm, honest, and one of Tam's most personal episodes yet. 

In this episode: 

Do Yourself a Favour is available on YouTube: https://linktr.ee/doyourselfafavour_podcast 

Join the conversation! Do Yourself a Favour is on Facebook LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/tamaracallaghan/ 

Do Yourself a Favour is recorded at Tailwind Studio: https://www.linkedin.com/company/tailwind-studio 

Formerly known as the 50/50 Podcast. 

——————— 

Chapters 

0:00 Intro — Beaches reference and audience demographics 

0:51 Wrestling with Bette vs Barbara 

1:45 Being performer vs supporter — personal history 

3:33 The impact of kindness and being 'Barbara' 

6:28 Reflection on ego, achievement, and worthiness 

9:16 Distinguishing creation from ego-driven success 

11:14 Personal dreams and perspective — backup singer story 

12:27 Desire for self-recognition and impact 

13:50 Self-care as the mission — peace and self-love 

14:41 Practical exercise — list of 50 things and closing 

——————— 

#TamCallaghan #DoYourselfAFavour #Beaches #BetteOrBarbara #SelfLove #Ego #PersonalGrowth #Kindness #Authenticity #SelfCompassion #InnerWork #Worthiness #PodcastAustralia #MindsetShift #BeTheWindBeneathYourOwnWings