Don't Wreck Yourself

This episode has it all, a cool place for fat bears to hang out and dine in luxury, aliens eating factory farmed humans, humans eating humans because vaccines don't come in pills, and a guy who literally blew the literal lid off of the conspiracy around why so many McDonald's locations can't keep their McFlurry machines working.

In this Episode, Ryan forces Matt to describe a recent stint of misfortune for your entertainment, then Matt brings up a user correction of a fact that Ryan misremembered in a clear retaliation. Then Matt walks us through a question from Reddit's now infamous r/nostupidquestions regarding how bat babies get born. Well, when a Batwoman loves a Batman very much... Then Ryan raises issues with career advice from the internet. Matt then goes on to talk about Scabby, the ubiquitous labor union mascot that pops up outside non-union job sites. Finally, the guys return to Reddit to figure out who alive today will be remembered in 500 years.

In this episode, Matt and Ryan are joined by Shakin' Shaner from the What's Shakin' With Shaner Podcast, a geek centric podcast that dips its toes into the strange and absurd. Ryan opens up the discussion by attacking Matt and Shane's conclusions from Matt's guest spot on Episode 11 of What's Shakin' With Shaner. Then they discuss a geologist's theory that the Great Sphynx at Giza is actually about 5,000 years older than everyone thinks, before moving on to an r/nostupidquestions topic that seeks to know how the government would deal with a real life Joker committing acts of terror, giving Shane the chance to flex his nerd muscles by introducing The Comics Code Authority, a very real life governing body that DID deal with the Joker, Batman, and every mutant or alien who ever slipped their underwear over a pair of tights. Finally, they discuss an image circulating on reddit that shows a tick that seems to have a tick... which segues into a conspiracy theory regarding a mysterious government facility on Plum Island.

The guys delve into a user question about a common idiom with deep anti-Francophone roots, then they dispel some myth around the magical ability of careless witches. After that, they discuss the health risk and environmental concerns surrounding roadside bottles of pee (don't worry, they tell you how to get rid of it too). Finally, they cross the finish line with a passionate discussion of the sometimes underground sport of baby racing. Spoiler: it's only illegal if you race for slips.

On this week's episodes, Matt and Ryan uncover everything the government doesn't want you to know about Xanax addicted, Ketamine peddling, Yakuza tattoo artist furries fighting the Islamic State in the streets of Lima Peru. If we're being honest, it's mostly stuff the government doesn't care if you know... but you'll learn all the same. Then they issue a declaration on a query posted to Reddit's AITA forum that strips away layers of deception, dances around the issue, and ultimately grinds out some solid relationship advice for all the a-holes out there. Then they weigh in on a question of sexual attraction, and finally round out the episode discussing a political crusade against alleged vampire dens in America's Arizoniest state.

Matt and Ryan open up by discussing how they want to open up episodes in the future. Does Matt need a catchphrase? Ryan thinks so. Then the guys discuss a questionable tweet purportedly written by Elon Musk praising the acumen of drug dealers. After that, they take a trip through history and possibly hell to uncover the secret writings of a nun who penned the devil's diss track... is she quoting the devil or is this just more Elon Musk plagiarism? They follow up with a sinful discussion of the breakfast of Millennial champions... butt, then they talk about the reproductive cycle of eels. They round off a trashy episode with more trash talk, discussing whether trash picking is an invasion of privacy.

Matt and Ryan tastefully unravel the implications of the common blaspheme "Sweet Jesus!". Then they answer a Reddit user's question about using simian troops in war. Revisiting a topic raised in a previous episode, Matt discusses the history of China's Panda Diplomacy. Finally, they wrap up just before the cows come home by helping a Redditor join a herd of cows without raising the alarm.

Matt and Ryan make peace with listener feedback from Maurice. Then they tackle a silly meme decrying the rampant socialism in our technoplutocracy. They discuss fishy video that surfaced online. Then they go searching for the truth, only to find out it was right behind them looking cheeky the whole time. Finally, they revisit the topic of self-driving cars, but this time they want to discuss googly eyes and their safety applications.

Apparently you can't put a cheese emoji in an episode title, and scientists say they don't have new problems to solve... In this episode, Matt and Ryan answer a Reddit user's query about the big picture significance of having offspring, then they discuss the recent controversy surrounding the International Olympic Committee's inclusion of Marijuana in a list of banned performance enhancing drugs. Stick around for investment tips as they discuss a bank that will take cheese as collateral, and finally Ryan holds Matt's feet to the fire over how many corpses it would take to scare him out of a jacuzzi.

The fellas get into the "gif or jif" debate. But before that, Ryan and Matt dive headfirst into the Reddit hive mind to answer questions about the stigma swirling around a popular (probably) male sex toy and how to best interact with a romantic interest. Ryan also debriefs on his recent nay-cation, and Matt gets into the nitty-gritty of a recent gender reveal party involving a favorite nocturnal mammal.