Downsizing

I've been thinking about buying a kilt.  Not a tartan one, they make these like, battle kilts that quite frankly look really comfortable.  I'm already wearing overalls everyday, I've got overall shorts that I almost fit into, a kilt isn't that much of a leap for me.  And if I get told I can't wear it I'll just complain to the news, get on tv, and then I can plug the podcast!  Wins all around.

Outro song: Pepsi Man Theme Song - JAMES&GANG

Podcast logo by Joey Rizk

Well hey if this whole podcasting thing doesn't work out I hear crime pays!

Outro Song: Candyman - Christina Aguilera

Logo by Joey Rizk

I think if I start selling merch it has to be as stupid as possible.  Like no shirts, no hoodies, only underwear, zip ties, and tea kettles.  All with the Downsizing logo, of course.  Nothing says successful business model like a sickening degree of irony.

Outro song: Caillou Theme Song Remix - Attic Stein Beats

Logo by Joey Rizk

Do any of you know a good kombucha recipe?  I got a starter kit, but I'm sure there's an upper limit to how good it can be.  I want to make my own, but I don't want to go around throwing a bunch of spices into a jar and end up having to drink something that tastes like watery, spicy poison.  So if you were going to give me a recipe for kombucha that tastes like that, well, don't.

Outro song: Potato Chips - Slim Gaillard

Logo by Joey Rizk

Hey guys, it's me again.  I'm just wondering if you know what's cool right now.  I'm a little out of the loop.  Is it Dr. Marten's? What does based mean?  Based on what?  How old am I?  I'm in my twenties.  Yeah, no I know what was cool like two days ago I just don't know if it's the same, like, right now.  That Bill Eilish guy?  He's cool right?  Yeah, okay cool thanks, uh, chief? Bro?  Guy?

I don't know if I'm going to keep writing actual descriptions to these episodes.  I mean everything you need to know is in the title.  Maybe I'll use this section for philosophical ponderings.  For example: if you're fully clothed, and submerged in a pool, and you pee, did you pee your pants? Or did you just pee in a pool and it doesn't count because your pants are already wet?  Feel free to send me your thoughts.

End Song: The Hockey Song - Stompin' Tom Connors

Logo by Joey Rizk

This week I earn myself a sociology degree merit badge by taking a look at some of the causes of obesity. The Take2 Podcast is in full swing in this episode folks, buckle up!

End song: Thick Thighs - Priscilla Block

Logo by Joey Rizk 

This week we switch things up a little bit and take stock of where we're at in this journey.  Also belts, furries, and McDonald's.

End song: Junk Food Junkie - Larry Groce

Logo by Joey Rizk

This week I started a new podcast within the podcast, Take2!  It's the podcast that tracks every time I flub a sentence and have to repeat it, often getting lost in the process.  Merch for Take2 coming soon!  As for Downsizing it's the usual, I talk a big game for a guy who isn't paying attention to anything, ever, and shoot from the hip with hot takes.

Outro song: Big and Chunky - will.i.am

Logo by Joey Rizk

This week is a portion controlled episode where I discuss anime, stunts, anime, the illuminati, and the food pyramid. My English is steadily improving, but my taste in media is not!  Feast your ears on this big sucker!

Outro Song: Just a Lil' Thick - Trinidad James Ft. Lil Dicky, Mystikal

Podcast logo by Joey Risk