Dr. Simone’s Mind Space

It’s a very frequently discussed topic and no simple answer can be given.

The amount of consumption of stimuli in today’s world is incredibly. Filtering all the input isn’t easy, especially for children, who haven’t yet developed their executive functions. As parents, we feel the urge to organise lots of after school activities, engage, and entertain our children, hardly letting time pass without “productive” content. This constant “ON” switch requires less frustration tolerance and there with less training of such skills.

How do we deal with frustration tolerance?

• Less is more!

@drschwank

@unesurcent

@optimalperformancezurich

The importance of autonomy can’t be underestimated in all ages, from birth to old age. The earlier we establish autonomy, the better for our sense of self, self-esteem, self-containment, frustration tolerance, and general independence.

We all desire to be independent masters of our own lives, in very young and very mature  age.

Giving safe autonomy early in a baby’s, infant, and toddler’s life, requires trust, courage, patience, and respect from the parents. The more parents are aware of their important role, the earlier a child develops autonomy, learns skills, masters them by him/herself, resulting in happiness, pride, and certainty reduces frustration.

Motto for parents:

Give your children time!

Time to play by themselves, figure out role plays to get in touch with their feelings.

Dare to let your child be bored!

It fosters creativity and frustration tolerance. It gives the child a sense of control, ownership, pride, and competence. A true self-esteem booster.

@drschwank

@unesurcent

@optimalperformancezurich

As parents, we positively influence our children’s self-esteem by giving the children autonomy from a very early age on.

We can praise them for their efforts in school, extra curricular activities, sports, music, art, etc. not for their performance, grades, winning, etc. The latter reduces self-esteem,  sets the child under massive performance pressure, as the child is only seen and appreciated for its performance not for oneself.

Warm and loving relationships are the foundation of children’s self-esteem because they make children feel valued and worthwhile. Relationships are built on plenty of responsive, caring interactions with your child. Family rituals are important too, because they build your family relationships and give your child a sense of belonging.

You can build a positive relationship with your child by:

• being in the moment with your child

A self-esteem booster list:

• Help kids find their passion

References

https://raisingchildren.net.au/toddlers/behaviour/understanding-behaviour/about-self-esteem

Today’s children’s schedule is more compact than many adults. It involves a lot of performance driven activities, such as exam preparation, homework, music lessons, competitive sports, potential tutoring, and more.

This constant performance and active mode of children limits creative play, boredom, and phantasy. It further requires parent involvement, rather than time with peers or by oneself.

Recommendations:

• Less is more!

@drschwank

@unesurcent

@optimalperformancezurich

Starting a new school year is demanding for everyone within the family. New routines need to be established, stress regulated, adjustment to new academic and social settings digested and contained.

This requires a lot of emotional capacity and stress tolerance by the parents. Being aware of this crucial role as parents is very relevant and parents will notice the positive outcome of a more harmonious home, when providing that emotional outlet. For parents of children of all age groups, building buffer zones is crucial, in order to have the mental space to deal with the children’s emotions. Especially, during the first weeks after the long summer break.

A practical family guide:

• Take turns in attending the children vs. alone and couple’s time.

@drschwank

@unesurcent

@optimalperformancezurich

Today’s conversation and first episode of a public health series, with Anna Raggi, MD, gynecologist, reproductive medicine specialist and gynecological endocrinologist. Women's health has always fascinated her, and even as a young doctor she enjoyed listening to her patients, consulting, and advising them. She is very passionate about her work at the Fertisuisse fertility treatment center in Olten and Basel, Switzerland, which she founded with three partners in 2014. She is very grateful that she has became a mother of two children at a relatively young age. www.fertisuisse.ch, www.wirwolltendich.ch

@drschwank

@unesurcent

@optimalperformancezurich

A time of excitement, anxiety, and increased stress for all family members.

How can we best navigate this time to keep the calm and support our little ones the best?

• Start the day with a family routine.

@drschwank

@unesurcent

@optimalperformancezurich

Many parents around the world are currently spending more time with their children than during their usual working days. School holidays are usually longer than parents holiday weeks off work, resulting in lots of organization, additional financial costs, challenges to meet all family members’ needs, tension, family, couple’s vs. alone time.

How to deal with summer break as a family, couple, and individual parent?

A practical guide to summer school break:

• Discuss in advance your expectations.

@drschwank

@optimalperformancezurich

@unesurcent

After a wonderful time as a couple, leaving the baby with hid grandparents, to suddenly be all alone, needs adjustment!

Such a tough day, making one very sensitive, vulnerable, and thin skinned.

On such a day, it’s important to be extra kind and generous to ourselves.

Here comes a list of recommendations:

• Go to a cafe by yourself.

@drschwank

@optimalperformancezurich

@unesurcent

How do we define life quality in its core?

Living in today’s societies, constantly being on is difficult. We run around 24/7 in our mind and physically always being on the go, planning the next activity, task etc.

Being and living in the moment isn’t even existing anymore. That’s very sad and concerning, with regards to our mental and physical health. It takes a lot of effort to get into a state of calm and relaxation, when the mind is constantly on overdrive.

Tips to unwind:

• Schedule some time in nature, a relaxing class.

@drschwank

@optimalperformancezurich

@unesurcent