Driven to Drink

Prepare yourselves.

What you’re about to hear is an actual Craigslist posting from Thursday, January 5th.

Coachella announced its 2017 schedule and lineup on Tuesday, January 3rd.

Gordon got 2 VIP passes for Weekend 2.

Then he dropped this: (archived link).

Yikes.

American Horror Story: Gordie.

Have a listen.  It’s good clean fun.

(Actually, you might feel a bit dirty…but rest assured, nobody responded to Gordon’s enticing offer.  I think.  Actually, I have no idea.  There might be some twenty-something tied up on a used mattress in the back of Gordo’s camper with Tom Petty’s “American Girl” blasting,  several gallons of Palmer’s lotion in the passenger seat, and a high pressure hose nozzle just in case.)

We present to you, “Gordie.”

The music?  Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers, “American Girl,” (duh) and Johnny Cash’s cover of, “If You Could Read My Mind.”

-G

Gordie’s Sweet Camper

I was right here, with my wife.

And the dog.

Who’d just expelled her anal glands on Jen’s lap.

After several days of having no access to our toilets/sinks/showers due to a soft plug that the plumber couldn’t get on the 29th and wouldn’t be getting back to until January 2nd, causing us to find alternate showers (…Planet Fitness…) and poopers (…McDonalds…) and also relearn how to clean dishes like the pioneers did.

So…yeah, fuck all that.

It was, literally and figuratively, a shitty, shitty week.

The Christian holiday taint.

You know, the week between Christmas and January 1st?

Right. Ours kind of sucked, but we found ways toward joy, peace, love, and sanity.

I share some of that with you here, “Where Were You December 31st, 2016?”

And also, “Bizarre Love Triangle” by New order, as well as, “Strange Love” by Depeche Mode.

Emo ’til I die.

-G

Aunt Penny had a super power.

She honed in on the best of a person, and then she pulled it out, cultivated and resonated it. She made me a better person not because of anything she created, not because of ulterior motives or selfish agendas, but because she placed a mirror in front of my face. She read everything I wrote, listened to every minute I recorded, recognized so many beautiful and unique things underneath all of the anxiety, worry, and anger…and simply allowed me to see what she saw. And what she always saw was hopeful, beautiful, and uplifting.

That was her super power.

I love her. And I love me more today because she loved me, and I her.

Powerful.

The world is missing a significant piece of it’s soul today, or perhaps it isn’t…because so many people now walk the earth with clearer vision, with deeper self-knowledge, and with a more confident ability to resonate love.

I chose two songs that communicate such depth of soul, such love, such peace. “In the Lord’s Arms,” by Ben Harper and “I Shall Be Released,” by The Band.

I proudly present to you, “Penny’s Podcast.”

It’s December 31st.

I’m in a good head space, sufficiently intoxicated, and happy to give you the final piece of my conversation with Mary here.

She’s a beautiful person.

I recorded an introduction, through which I experienced insights, thinking about a recent conversation with Jen.

Another beautiful person.

And the music between the intro and the podcast is, “I Smile” by Kirk Franklin.

Yet…another…beautiful person.

Lotta beauty in here.

I present to you, “Let Go, Don’t Worry, Experience (Mary, pt 2),” and wish you a little peace of mind, some financial breathing room, sufficient time with Netlfix, and all the love available to you in the new year.

Love yinz.

-G

This is the penultimate podcast of 2016.

and

You can fuck right off, 2016.

Really.  If this year were the year when Dickens’ published “A Christmas Carol,” the ghost of Christmas’ present would look a hell of a lot more like the ghost of Christmas’ past in the actual book.

So fuck this year.  I will not look at the gravestone.  I will not brush the snow away to view the horrifying words etched by Trumpletongues and Trumpeters and Donald Trump and Vlad Putin and the opioid epidemic and cancer and all of the other shit that has me held together so thinly that I’d unravel like a cheaply made Cosby (…fuck that guy too…) sweater and crumble in a pile of liberal tears and useless stocking stuffers.

Oh…hey, we have Mary on this one.  Mary is awesome and she doesn’t deserve all of that anxiety and vitriol above.

Today we talk about Unitarianism, active listening, Christmas cookies, awesome neighbors, beautiful children, and the true spirit of this, and if we can get our shit together, all seasons.

Please listen.  Don’t let my intensity cause you to pause.  This is well worth your time.

Also, John Lennon and the vocal genius of Yoko Ono in, “Happy Christmas (War is Over),” and also Elton John with, “Yellow Brick Road.”

Those are beautiful tunes, and Mary is a beautiful human.

Love yinz!

-G

Trigger Warning: You will hear the actual “N Word” in this podcast, and not just once…and never as a racial epithet or indicator of hate or white supremacy. It’s conversational, and it’s included because it needed to be there. If you can’t handle the word, then you might want to either skip this altogether or be prepared for some fast forwarding.

Have you ever felt afraid to vote, inadequate? Like you haven’t done your research as well as you know you should have but you feel an obligation to complete the one civic duty that is reportedly the foundation of our constitutional republic of sorts?

Yeah, me too.

And RJ.

I’m giving you Levon Helm today. The Band. First, “I Shall Be Released.” At the end, “When I Paint My Masterpiece.”

I really do wish you’d listen to this, but I understand if you choose otherwise.

Love yinz!

-G

RJ and I recorded this podcast the day after the third presidential debates.

That’s all the pretext I’m giving you.

Oh, and RJ asked me the question, “Why is Trump bad?”

And I answered.

That’s this podcast.

Also, “Get it Together,” by the Beastie Boys, and “We the People,” by A Tribe Called Quest.

-G

P.S.  We’re both pretty fucking drunk by this point.

P.P.S.  Like, bottle of navy strength rum drunk.

Today, RJ is totally quotable.

“You can’t explain this shit to people who don’t know.”

But right?!

That may be the most profound thing ever uttered on a Driven to Drink podcast.  Because you can’t, if they don’t.

“So much Montuno right now.”

We shift from Ringo Starr’s metric modulation to afro-cuban rhythms.

And then, at the very end, after all the music, I’ve tagged a gem for you.   I call it, “The Philanthropy Incident.”

Love yinz!

-G

P.S.  Music.  Up front, “Solamente las Claves,” by Conjuntos Cespedes.  Midway, “Fast as You Can,” by Fiona Apple.  Pre-philanthropy, “Song for the Dumped,” by Ben Folds Five.

P.P.S. If you don’t know…now you know.

We’re straight in with Beatles talk.

We’re also straight in with the concept of magic.

Music…can be magic.

Art…can be magic.

What is magic?  I’m not entirely sure but I know this, art has provided me with such emotionally overwhelming experiences, such glimpses into the heart of that which I typically cannot sense, such human beauty…that I can’t think of a better word than “magic.”

Some might say, “God.”

In either case, it’s a matter of faith, right?  That art can inspire and aspire and build impossible spires of Truth…is inconceivable.

That escalated quickly.

Anyway, here you’ll RJ and me, both entering the land of inebriation, brains focused, senses dulled.

Strap in, have fun, we present to you, “Magic (RJ Again, pt 2).”

-G

P.S. The music comes at the beginning (“Oh, Darling!”) and middle (“Strawberry Fields Forever”), not at the end.  Just a warning.  Warning you with peace and love.

Hi.

Did you miss me?

I missed you, and I missed producing these podcasts.

Today, we begin a journey with RJ, discussing my recent dive into the Beatles pool, and various other music related ephemera.

We begin with the Beatles’ tune, “Flying” from Magical Mystery Tour.

We end with “Heaven On Their Minds” from the original cast recording of Jesus Christ Superstar.

This episode is largely sober.  Things will become drunker, but no less sonigenic.  (I’m not sure if that is a word, the equivalent of photogenic but related to the ear.  But RJ is quite sonigenic.  I could listen to him forever.)

Okay, go listen to us!

-G

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