Parenting is a Joke

Emily Walsh Redefines What “Ready" Means


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In this episode, Ophira talks with comic and new mom and comedian Emily Walsh, who shares how she spent her twenties and thirties convinced she didn’t want kids, only to find herself writing an Edinburgh show about that exact ambivalence and then trying to conceive between gigs in Atlantic City. Emily describes entering stand-up at 30 after years painting sets for Blue Bloods—so many beige walls she started an Instagram called “Beige Bloods”—and navigating a scene of young men who only acknowledged her existence after she did well onstage. She and her husband weighed whether comedy’s unpredictable grind should dictate their future, eventually trying minor-science fertility help because their work schedules kept missing the 18-hour ovulation window. Emily recounts giving birth a month early with the flu, spending twelve hours in a triage room where nurses kept losing the baby’s heart rate, avoiding a balloon induction only because she was already three centimeters dilated, and delivering after an emergency episiotomy followed by the infamous “puppet moment” when a surgeon had to reach in by hand to remove her placenta—much to her husband’s horror when he asked if she’d please double-check with an ultrasound.

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Parenting is a JokeBy Ophira Eisenberg

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