Did you know that sex encourages intimacy? Orgasms release oxytocin which is a feel-good bonding hormone. Sex helps you feel closer to your partner.   Checking in with each other, connections, kindness and understanding that a healthy sex life takes constant commitment.   A disinterested intimate life is common, particularly for women after children. If you're in this boat you can change this, female sexual pleasure is a learned skill, an education. Keeping in mind you love your partner, respect him and you’ve let go of any resentments you have been holding onto you can get interested in sex again.   Find out what my 5 top tips are for women to be interested in sex again.   A disappointing intimate life is common, but not forever, as female sexual pleasure is a learned skill! Transform your sex life and your life via intimacy with a decision to begin doing it differently.

In a relationship, your partner can trigger you and push all your buttons and show you what you need to heal. “I feel trapped, caged, controlled and stifled”, is an opportunity to stop blaming and being a victim.

It’s very easy to blame for the limitations in your life. Your partner can be the strongest resource for your self-growth. Explore your differences with your partner, in a non-judgmental way.

When you are on your own it’s easy, however, there is no personal growth. You can control who you see, when and how much you want to be part of this. They say nice things and leave when you have had enough. In a relationship, your partner can trigger you and push all your buttons and show you what you need to heal.

Learn the 5 ways to build a stronger relationship and meet your deepest needs together.

So many of us neglect ourselves, reject ourselves, put ourselves way down in the pecking order. I get it, it’s extremely challenging to balance all the moving parts of your life and having specific roles often takes first place. 

We look outside of ourselves to seek what we internally need and particularly from our partner. An example, if you need to be needed you will rescue your partner, you will look for a partner that needs rescuing. For example, an alcoholic, they're irresponsible, you responsible.

Find out the 3 Important questions to ask yourself to discover when you started looking outside of yourself to find you're good enough.

Relationships that are healthy and go long term are because each person in the relationship chooses love for themselves first.  They know their self-care is self-love. Finding you, marrying you first is the key to a healthy empowered marriage.

The biggest breakup to relationships is the bickering and the disconnect.  Your impatience, annoyance, and intolerance of your partner break down the communication and connection.

Freeing yourself from your arguing and fighting takes time and energy. Uncovering the needs and expectations you bring to your relationship/marriage is your work. To heal the wounds, you have brought with you because if you don’t you will carry them with you for the rest of your life. 

Divorce doesn’t resolve the emotional business of a relationship.  It just gives you legal permission to repeat the same pattern with someone else.

The disowning of your feelings, you feel suffocation and then project it on to your partner. We all have unfinished emotional business, every single one of us.

Love isn’t what you feel, it’s what you do. 

Find out the 4 crucial steps you need to do to stop the arguing and fighting today.

“I will be happy when I have the cash and the new man.  Let’s also add in the new career, new wardrobe and the flash car.”

Is this you?

You are highly charged, reactive and swing like a pendulum according to the outside triggers.

This is a tough way to live life and a lot of us live like this.  Safety, security and worth is something outside of yourself.  So great is our thirst to be seen, validated, and approved of it that sets us up for living unauthentically and in a false way.

Would you like to do it differently?

Communication is the key to a quality healthy relationship.

7 Questions for Improving Communication

Here are 7 questions to determine your readiness and willingness to improve and start a different way of communicating and relating in your relationship. Am I assuming based on my experiences?

In times of fear, change and uncertainty we need comfort and closeness. We do not want to be alone. The impact on mental/emotional health is damaging and can create insecurity, poor self-image, unhappiness, depression, reduced energy and mental fatigue. The mental illness rebounds will resonate for years to come.

If couples accept the reality of what there is and focus on building. Lockdown is a wonderful opportunity to build a great foundation for their relationship.

• Communication
• Connection
• Commitment
• Fun
• Growth
• Trust

I’m going to give 7 tips on how to help improve relationships if you have found this year has negatively impacted yours.

Here are four questions that I received recently that many of you may be thinking or have thought about at some point.

Questions regarding: The difficult choice of divorce when you realise the marriage is over. Who you will be on the other side of divorce, adjusting to the inevitable changes? Having sex to please your partner, even when you don’t feel like it. And that feeling of distance and disconnection when children enter the relationship and become the priority.

I will discuss reframing your thoughts and beliefs, facing the changes in your life, standing up for yourself and lasting past the honeymoon stage a couple needs an emotional and mental connection.

Tune in for a series of ideas to move the rut and stagnation in you and your relationship and much, much more.

Couples often become co-dependent because each person cannot recognize their own worth without feeling cared for and/or needed by the other. In other words, co-dependency is caused by an underlying sense of self-rejection and self-abandonment.

Are you feeling empty and unfulfilled and need sex and approval regularly?

Are you feeling like a martyr, sacrificing yourself and overly busy?

Making your partner responsible for your feelings; that is, you make it, so your unhappiness is tied to your partner's actions instead of taking responsibility yourself for how you feel is co-dependency.

Perhaps you are tuned in to your partner's feelings but tend to ignore your own feelings or often don't even know how you feel.

Co-dependency is a relationship pattern that focuses on others at the expense of yourself. It relies on external validation. Seeking approval from others, seldom from yourself.

It is common for co-dependent people to be people pleasers.

Find out what you need to do to begin addressing this very common relationship problem.

A couple’s ability to repair their conflict is so important, not in their ability to avoid it. Communication is the most crucial tool in any relationship especially when there is conflict. How do you communicate?

We can communicate in 4 different ways, find out what you do……

Successful conflict resolution sets aside the regrettable incident when it’s worked through and leaves it in the past. On the other hand, repair may be unsuccessful, in which case it may amplify the problem and continue to be the source of negativity and resentment into the future.

See what my top 5 tips are to aim for in your relationship to deepen your understanding and how you connect as a couple particularly with conflict.

To sacrifice your identity, your wants, your purpose and your needs for the sake of the marriage is common, particularly for women. 

The universal sign of being wanted, settled, and loved is marriage. 

The longer the better, 15 years, 25 years, and 30 years.  The cultural programming, the measure of worth lies in the other, like marriage and not from deep within yourself.

“I’ve been married 27 years!” It’s like a badge of honour and the longer the time the better.  However, no one knows what’s going on inside the marriage.

Many marriages are not working, communication and intimacy have broken down. Women ask, Who am I, now without my child needing me?  People are consumed by fear and unworthiness.

Many of us have been suppressed for a long time and stay in marriages that died years ago.

Find out my 4 reasons people stay in marriages that finished years ago.