Empowered Relationship Podcast: Your Relationship Resource And Guide

How do couples draw the line between business and romantic relationships?

Managing a business is a powerful force that can take over the family in so many ways and have a significant impact on the marriage. It's a lot to take in and simply unavoidable.

Unlike couples who are not negotiating business, it is critical to provide additional support to couples who are doing business and building a relationship under the same roof.

In this episode, we'll talk about entrepreneur couples and what they're up against. Dr. Ellyn Bader shares some real-life examples as well as some tools to help navigate these challenges.

Dr. Ellyn Bader is a psychotherapist and one of the early founders of couples therapy, as well as a recognized thought leader and trailblazer in relationship therapy worldwide.

Through her informal research and thousands of sessions, Ellyn co-created the Developmental Model, a revolutionary approach to couples therapy that is highly adaptable to the complex needs of two people growing, changing, and staying connected in a relationship.

Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website.

In this episode

5:37 Ellyn talks about the first-hand experiences that inspired her to help couples negotiate business and couplehood.

8:09 How to manage couple-time that is off-limits for business talk.

13:14 Six skills for living, loving, and working together:

14:46 Commitment.

19:38 Appreciation.

25:17 Negotiation.

32:34 Decision Making.

44:06 Where to find more information on Ownership and Roles with authority.

Peter Pearson, Ph.D., Emeritus

The Daily Double 30-Day Challenge

The CANDOR Solution: The Entrepreneur's Marriage Blueprint

Couples as a Team

The Developmental Model

Entrepreneurs Marriage Intensive

The Couples Institute website

Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins

Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship

Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins

Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/

Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation

LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins

Twitter: @DrJessHiggins

Website: drjessicahiggins.com

Email: [email protected]

If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here.

Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship.

Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here.

Thank you!

*With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

To commemorate the 300th episode of the Empowered Relationship Podcast here's a special episode for you all!

Since the premiere episode in 2015, our goal has been to help people feel more prepared and, as a result, set their relationships up for success by encouraging them to invest in the strength of their connection rather than second-guessing their partner choice.

Learn how couples can shift into safer, more positive, and more connected patterns of relating as she discusses key findings out of a landmark relationship science study that was published in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, which was first-authored by Samantha Joel.

Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website.

In this episode

08:08 What constitutes a successful relationship, and why do some relationships thrive more than others?

16:06 Top relationship characteristics that most accurately predict a person's happiness.

30:00 Five personal attributes that can help predict a person's happiness.

A landmark study shows what makes a successful relationship

Machine learning uncovers the most robust self-report predictors of relationship quality across 43 longitudinal couples studies

Dr. Susan Johnson's website

Gottman Institute

Julie Gottman's wikipedia page

Samantha Joel's citations on Google Scholar

Podcast Rocket's website

ERP 297: How to Enhance Emotional Intimacy in Your Relationship – An Interview with Amber Dalsin

ERP 274: How Increasing Relationship Love & Health Can Impact Borderline Personality Disorder – An Interview with Gabrielle Usatynski

ERP 169: What to Do When Depression Takes Hold in Your Relationship, with Dr. Susan Heitler

ERP 166: How Perfectionism And Depression Affect You And Your Relationship – with Dr. Margaret Rutherford

ERP 015: Do You Have a "Unity" or "Journey" Mindset In Relationship?

Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins

Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship

Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins

Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/

Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation

LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins

Twitter: @DrJessHiggins

Website: drjessicahiggins.com

Email: [email protected]

If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here.

Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship.

Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here.

Thank you!

*With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

When confronted with situations that make us feel distressed, it's so easy to project those feelings onto others, and sometimes we don't even realize why we are feeling that way.

This can be caused by deeply ingrained childhood beliefs that we might not be aware of. If left unaddressed, these can interfere with our ability to show our authentic selves to our partners.

In this episode, Beth Miller shares how she overcame extreme anxiety and depression and how that transformed her personal and marital life. She explains how understanding your inner child leads to a deeper understanding of your relationship conflicts and so much more.

Beth Miller is the founder of Soulify Wellness, a marriage coach, a teacher of psychology, and consulting hypnotist. She has coached many women who are on the verge of divorce and helped them transform their marriages into relationships filled with mutual love, connection, and support.

One of her secret weapons is Hypno-journeying, a deep meditation that's rooted in psychology, and neuroscience. It helps women release beliefs that are keeping them stuck in relationship struggles. And while Beth focuses a lot of her work on supporting women, I do believe these principles are very applicable to however you identify in your gender.

Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website.

In this episode

3:35 How Beth's brain bleed affected her marriage and what she did to save it that ultimately led to her journey of helping other wives with their relationships, too.

10:11 Using hypnosis to recognize triggers and how accessing your subconscious helps you heal from deep-rooted issues inside you.

17:16 How understanding your inner child can help solidify your marriage.

21:38 The beautiful transformation that can happen once you start addressing the root causes of your problems.

3 Ways to Save Your Marriage

True You

Website Soulify Wellness

Facebook facebook.com/soulifywellness

Instagram instagram.com/soulifywellness

Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins

Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship

Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins

Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/

Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation

LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins

Twitter: @DrJessHiggins

Website: drjessicahiggins.com

Email: [email protected]

If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here.

Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship.

Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here.

Thank you!

*With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

Most of us are familiar with non-verbal communication being upwards of 80% of all communication and part of that is facial expressions.

In this episode, Dan Hill talks about his journey and 20 years of experience in facial decoding. Learn about the seven core emotions and how facial decoding can be a useful tool in navigating intimate relationships.

Dan Hill is an internationally recognized expert on the role of emotions and business, politics, sports, popular culture, and one's personal relationships. Among his 9 books, is Famous Faces Decoded: A Guidebook for Reading Others, which uses celebrities' examples to promote emotional literacy and the 23 facial expressions that reveal seven core emotions. Dan's TV appearances have included ABC's "Good Morning, America," NBC's "The Today Show," CNN, Fox, MSNBC, and front-page coverage and the New York Times.

Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website.

4:18 How Dan Hill's fascination with brain science led him to pioneering facial decoding in market research 20 years ago.

14:54 The 7 core emotions.

19:25 How facial decoding helps navigate intimate relationships.

30:11 Identifying contempt through facial expressions.

32:27 The upside and downside of anger.

39:25 About surprise and how this can be helpful in a relationship?

43:07 How fear or sadness can be fatal when it comes to communication.

46:38 What to do if you feel threatened.

Famous Faces Decoded: A Guidebook for Reading Others (*Amazon Link)

Dan Hill's EQ Spotlight

Gottman Love Lab

Charles Darwin's Theory of Evolution

Plutchik's Color Wheel of Emotions

Tell all the truth but tell it to slant by Emily Dickinson

ERP 261: How to Strengthen Your Relationship from a Polyvagal Perspective, an Interview with Stephen Porges

Website Sensory Logic

Facebook facebook.com/Emotionswizard/

Instagram instagram.com/emotionswizard/

LinkedIn linkedin.com/in/dan-hill-emotionswizard/

Twitter twitter.com/EmotionsWizard

Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins

Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship

Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins

Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/

Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation

LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins

Twitter: @DrJessHiggins

Website: drjessicahiggins.com

Email: [email protected]

If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here.

Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship.

Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here.

Thank you!

*With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

According to research, women are the primary initiators of divorce, with emotional intimacy being the most significant factor.

In the early stages of a relationship, you may feel that intense sense of connection even without emotional intimacy because of the dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin, and pheromones making everything seem to be in perfect harmony. However, as time passes by, these neurotransmitters diminish.

In this episode, we'll dive into understanding what emotional intimacy is as Amber Dalsin talks about her personal journey — from someone who craves connection into a love that she never thought was possible. Learn about the 7 key components of emotional intimacy and the different ways of cultivating this beautiful connection that can stand the test of time.

Amber Dalsin is a licensed psychologist and couples therapist. She has delivered over 10,000 hours of One-on-One therapy services and has given professional talks to over 28,000 participants. Her mission is to help couples create intimate, loving, peaceful, and long-lasting relationships.

Check out the transcript to this episode in Dr. Jessica Higgin's website.

7:43 What sparked Amber's interest in helping individuals with Couplehood.

11:33 The 7 pillars of emotional intimacy.

21:33 What stands in the way of helping people create emotional intimacy.

31:04 How to identify emotional intimacy problems and assess whether or not they are fixable.

34:25 Simple things you could do to spice up your relationship.

42:31 Gender stereotypes and how these might relate to emotional intimacy.

The Gottman Institute

5 Love Languages

The 6-second kiss & the 20-second hug

Mini-Course: Emotional Intimacy Blueprint

Facebook Ember Relationship Psychology

Instagram Ember Relationship Psychology

Pinterest Ember Relationship Psychology | Couples Therapy

Podcast Relationship Psych | Love | Marriage | Conflict | Psychology

Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins

Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship

Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins

Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/

Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation

LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins

Twitter: @DrJessHiggins

Website: drjessicahiggins.com

Email: [email protected]

If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here.

Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship.

Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here.

Thank you!

*With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

In the spur of the moment, a simple argument can go out of hand if we focus on proving that we are right rather than seeking to understand our partner's emotional needs. We basically just listen so we can rebut. Whilst it does seem to be clever, it is not the same as understanding.

So, what can we do to change that? Shari Foos dives into what Relational Mindfulness is and how we can apply it to create meaningful connections in both romantic and non-romantic relationships.

Shari Foos is a licensed marriage and family therapist and creator of The Narrative Method. She holds an MA in clinical psychology from Antioch University, Los Angeles, and a Master's in Science in Narrative Medicine from Columbia University.

A sought-after expert on the subject of relationship and meaningful connection, Foos' writing and commentary have appeared in a range of online and print publications including Real Simple, Huffington Post, Women's Health, KBLA, Fatherly, LA Weekly, and Bustle.

Check out the transcript to this episode in Dr. Jessica Higgin's website.

04:53 Shari explains what Relational Mindfulness means.

09:06 Steps that you can do to regulate your nervous system enough to suspend and to engage in this practice.

26:17 Shari elaborates on The Narrative Method.

41:16 How to connect with Shari.

10 Tactics for Finding Happiness During Times of Isolation and Loneliness

On Becoming and Being a Mother by Shari Foos

Facebook: facebook.com/thenarrativemethod

Instagram: instagram.com/thenarrativemethod

LinkedIn: linkedin.com/company/thenarrativemethod

Twitter: twitter.com/NarrativeMethod

Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins

Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship

Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins

Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/

Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation

LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins

Twitter: @DrJessHiggins

Website: drjessicahiggins.com

Email: [email protected]

If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here.

Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship.

Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here.

Thank you!

*With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

Research shows that practicing mindfulness helps reduce stress, anxiety, lowers blood pressure and improves sleep. If we make it a habit, aside from our mental and physical health, it can also improve every aspect of our lives.

Can mindfulness improve our relationships, too? The answer is yes and in this episode, Caroline Welch talks about its benefits, some tips in incorporating it into our daily lives and so much more.

Caroline Welch is the CEO and co-founder, with Dr. Dan Siegel, of the Mindsight Institute in Santa Monica, California. She began her mindfulness practice forty years ago while working in Japan as an English teacher. Welch's book "The Gift of Presence: A Mindfulness Guide for Women" has been widely acclaimed. Caroline offers lectures and workshops on the power of mindfulness to enhance well-being in our personal and professional lives including its role in supporting racial and gender equity.

Stay tuned and learn how mindfulness can play a big role in bringing you and your partner closer!

Check out the transcript to this episode in Dr. Jessica Higgin's website.

In this episode:

5:14 Caroline's definition of mindfulness and how it started for her.

7:19 Some real-life examples of mindfulness.

12:54 Why is mindfulness important.

16:24 Features of mindfulness.

26:52 Understanding the 3 Ps: Purpose, Pivoting, Pacing.

Mentioned

• Mindsight Institute website

• The Gift of Presence: A Mindfulness Guide for Women book (*Amazon Link)

• Guided Mindfulness Meditation Practices with Jon Kabat Zinn website

• The Telomere Effect: A Revolutionary Approach to Living Younger, Healthier, Longer book (*Amazon Link)

• What Kind of Woman: Poems by Kate Baer book (*Amazon Link)

• John O'Donohue's website

• Life on Purpose by Victor J. Strecher: How Living for What Matters Most Changes Everything book (*Amazon Link)

• Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself by Dr. Kristin Neff book (*Amazon Link)

• The Guest House poem by Jalaluddin Rumi

Website: carolinewelch.com

Facebook: facebook.com/carolinewelchauthor

Instagram: instagram.com/carolinewelchauthor

Twitter: twitter.com/CarolineWauthor

Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins

Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship

Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins

Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/

Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation

LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins

Twitter: @DrJessHiggins

Website: drjessicahiggins.com

Email: [email protected]

If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here.

Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship.

Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here.

Thank you!

*With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

Friction and differences are breeding grounds for real conflicts, especially for couples. Because of one's environment, upbringing, situation, and other factors, we develop different personalities which can all contribute to our reactive patterns and biases.

Personality is such a complex psychological concept but what if we can bring understanding to what's going on? See where these perspectives are coming from? That would be a real game-changer!

Beatrice Chestnut, Ph.D., is a psychotherapist coach and business consultant based in San Francisco, and Uranio Paes, MBA is a world-renowned Enneagram teacher and business consultant. They are the founders of Chestnut Paes Enneagram Academy and the hosts of the Enneagram 2.0 Podcast.

They are also the authors of the forthcoming book, The Enneagram Guide to Waking Up: Find Your Path, Face Your Shadow, Discover Your True Self.

In their work around the world, Beatrice and Urano focus on using the Enneagram as a tool for personal and professional transformation.

In this episode, they briefly talk about the nine personality types in the Enneagram, the habitual patterns around these types, and essentially how this can be a powerful tool in improving relationships.

Check out the transcript to this episode in Dr. Jessica Higgin's website.

In this episode:

5:59 What's the Enneagram and what makes it so powerful

9:28 How the Enneagram can help with our relationships and how we interact with other personality types

10:37 Why it's recommended to get explicit and talk about it in couplehood

14:19 An overview of the nine types

33:35 Finding your type

42:25 About Enneagram Academy and other professional workshops they offer

Mentioned

• The Enneagram Guide to Waking Up: Find Your Path, Face Your Shadow, Discover Your True Self (*Amazon Link)
• Enneagram 2.0 with Beatrice Chestnut and Uranio Paes
• The Enneagram Academy

Website: beatricechestnut.com

Facebook: facebook.com/beatricechestnutphd

Instagram: instagram.com/beatrice.chestnut

LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/beatrice-chestnut-0493602/

Facebook: facebook.com/uranio.paes

Instagram: instagram.com/uraniopaes/

LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/ur%C3%A2nio-paes-624129

Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins

Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship

Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins

Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/

Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation

LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins

Twitter: @DrJessHiggins

Website: drjessicahiggins.com

Email: [email protected]

If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here.

Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship.

Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here.

Thank you!

*With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

The overarching reason couples seek help in relationships is to rejuvenate their connection and learn the skills to ensure the spark doesn't go out in the long term.

Alicia and Erwan join me today to share their road map to creating and sustaining a thriving relationship life. They share the three key relationship stages and dive into why couples in long-term relationships should understand the benefits of maintaining early-stage skills, such as flirting, in the later stages of a committed relationship so it can thrive.

Erwan and Alicia Davon have 25+ years of experience teaching singles and couples how to have exceptional romantic relationships while growing personally and spiritually. Their unique approach to relationship coaching combines their educational backgrounds in psychology with aspects of Zen Buddhism, providing a holistic method, improving connections with the self and others. They help singles have passionate and successful intimate relationships and guide couples to take their relationships to new heights of passion and intimacy.

Check out the transcript to this episode in Dr. Jessica Higgin's website.

In this episode:

09:21 Alicia and Erwan discuss how they developed their relationship stages and how they identified and grew through them in their relationship

14:30 How to get back the juicy passionate chemistry of earlier relationship stages and why micro gestures are gold

16:06 What a relationship blueprint is, why it is carried throughout life, and how you can discover what your blueprint is

20:43 Relationships don't happen to us, rather they happen through us — why being intentional about how we design our relationship allows us to show up and be committed to our relationship

21:35 Alicia and Erwan's names for the stages in a long term relationship and how to make progress through those natural stages mindful

30:20 The skills that we need to acquire before moving to the next relationship stage, and Erwan's tips for managing the challenges of each stage

36:00 Four practices that Alicia and Erwan recommend people do every day, including spiritual and sensual practice

Mentioned

• Schedule your free love life consultation with Alicia here
• The Relationship Map To Happy, Lasting Love

Connect with Alicia & Erwan Davon

Website: erwandavon.com

Facebook: facebook.com/erwandavonteachings

Instagram: instagram.com/erwandavonteachings/

Youtube: youtube.com/user/ErwanDavonTeachings

Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins

Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship

Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins

Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/

Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation

LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins

Twitter: @DrJessHiggins

Website: drjessicahiggins.com

Email: [email protected]

If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here.

Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship.

Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here.

Thank you!

*With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.

Cultural patriarchy and heteronormativity often negatively impact sexual and relational development — but they can be difficult to recognize and challenge.

On this episode of the Empowered Relationship podcast, we're talking about gender and its construction as we examine our society's cultural backdrop of hetero-normativity. Joe Winn joins me today to explore the principles to consider as we question ideas, notions, and messages that we receive around gender.

Joe Winn is a licensed clinical social worker, AASECT Certified Sex Therapist, and supervisor of Sex Therapy whose practice is outside of the Boston and Cambridge area. Joe has also lectured nationally and internationally on consensual non-monogamy, BDSM & kink, gender, and relationships. Joe is also a faculty member of The South Shore Sexual Health Center, an AASECT-approved training program for clinicians working towards certification in sex therapy.

Check out the transcript to this episode in Dr. Jessica Higgin's website.

In this episode:

05:01 Why gender is such a problematic construct in our culture

07:45 Gender as viewed from a heteronormative perspective, and why people often perceive an LGBTQ+ alternative as an attack on their beliefs.

11:43 Joe's thoughts on whether patriarchy is at the foundation of the gender construct and the ways the discomfort and fear feed into homophobia

19:55 Why we need to allow ourselves to step into the transformative process of understanding our needs to better develop authentic relationships

23:50 How to start engaging with people interested in alternative concepts of sex and gender and seek out meaningful dialogue.

31:05 The importance of self-care, tuning into ourselves and putting ourselves at the center of our experience so that we can also support our partner

35:26 How to recognize moments of discomfort around gender and why we should turn towards them

40:00 Strategies we can use to learn and reset if we have been indoctrinated by society with rigid beliefs

Mentioned

• South Shore Sexual Health Center website

Connect with Dr. Joseph Winn

Website: josephwinnlicsw.net

LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/joewinnlicsw

Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins

Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship

Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins

Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts/

Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation

LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins

Twitter: @DrJessHiggins

Website: drjessicahiggins.com

Email: [email protected]

If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the "Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins" button here.

Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship.

Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here.

Thank you!

*With Amazon Affiliate Links, I may earn a few cents from Amazon, if you purchase the book from this link.