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Law enforcement couples often struggle when trust and safety are shaken by communication breakdowns. Without a shared emotional language, spouses can feel disconnected, unseen, and unsafe — making trust even harder to build.
Episode Summary In this episode, Cyndi welcomes back therapist and author Kristal DeSantis to dive deeper into building trust for first responder couples. Together, they unpack:
Why safety must come before trust in police marriages
How "fixing" and "debating" often block connection
The four conversation positions every couple needs
Tools to create emotional safety and lasting trust
Practical ways to communicate across different "languages" in your relationship
Hosted by Cyndi Doyle, licensed professional counselor, retired police spouse, and author of Hold the Line: The Essential Guide to Protecting Your Law Enforcement Relationship.
📖 Grab Cyndi's book Hold the Line → https://www.amazon.com/Hold-Line-Protecting-Enforcement-Relationship-ebook/dp/B08TPRTY9G#customerReviews
🎤 Book Cyndi to speak at your department or conference → https://code4couples.com/training/
00:00 – Welcome back Kristal DeSantis 02:00 – Why safety comes before trust in relationships 05:00 – How men and women often "speak different languages" 12:00 – The four positions of conversation explained 20:00 – Why first responders default to fixing and debating 28:00 – Tools to reconnect and build lasting trust 40:00 – About Kristal's book STRONG 42:00 – Final words of hope for couples
By Cyndi Doyle4.8
7373 ratings
Law enforcement couples often struggle when trust and safety are shaken by communication breakdowns. Without a shared emotional language, spouses can feel disconnected, unseen, and unsafe — making trust even harder to build.
Episode Summary In this episode, Cyndi welcomes back therapist and author Kristal DeSantis to dive deeper into building trust for first responder couples. Together, they unpack:
Why safety must come before trust in police marriages
How "fixing" and "debating" often block connection
The four conversation positions every couple needs
Tools to create emotional safety and lasting trust
Practical ways to communicate across different "languages" in your relationship
Hosted by Cyndi Doyle, licensed professional counselor, retired police spouse, and author of Hold the Line: The Essential Guide to Protecting Your Law Enforcement Relationship.
📖 Grab Cyndi's book Hold the Line → https://www.amazon.com/Hold-Line-Protecting-Enforcement-Relationship-ebook/dp/B08TPRTY9G#customerReviews
🎤 Book Cyndi to speak at your department or conference → https://code4couples.com/training/
00:00 – Welcome back Kristal DeSantis 02:00 – Why safety comes before trust in relationships 05:00 – How men and women often "speak different languages" 12:00 – The four positions of conversation explained 20:00 – Why first responders default to fixing and debating 28:00 – Tools to reconnect and build lasting trust 40:00 – About Kristal's book STRONG 42:00 – Final words of hope for couples

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