rich & REGULAR with Kiersten and Julien Saunders

Ep 245: The simplest way to talk about money without making it weird


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There are two sentences that can ruin a perfectly normal evening – “We need to talk”, and its evil twin, “We need to talk about money.” Even if your relationship is good, that phrasing makes it feel like somebody’s about to get graded. 

Even when things are fine, nobody wants to be the person who turns a decent Tuesday night into a full relationship audit. So this week, we’re introducing a better way: small doors. These are quick, low-stakes, real-life openings that normalize money talk without turning it into a whole thing.

And the best part is, they’re not just for couples. Small doors can be used with parents, siblings, friends, or any relationship where money differences create distance

We get into:

  • Why “we need to talk about money” is basically a panic alarm for most people, even if they’re in good relationships
  • The difference between avoiding conflict and avoiding judgment, weirdness, and role shifts
  • Why money conversations work better as appetizers than a full-day “financial summit”
  • What “small doors” actually look like in real life (aka: our kid’s expensive cherry habit 😭)
  • How tiny, specific moments create safer openings than “we need a budget”
  • The 3 rules for small doors
  • How to treat your partner’s first reaction as data, not a personal attack
  • What to do when the issue isn’t the money, it’s the pattern of how you talk about money
  • Why tone is basically the WiFi of the conversation
  • Why you should practice the repair as much as the conversation

Links to helpful past episodes: 

  • Episode 222 - Why we don't share everything (and what we do instead)
  • Episode 207 - 3 practical tips for couples living on one income

Connect with Julien and Kiersten on our website, Instagram, Twitter, and YouTube.

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