This week, Matt goes full book janitor, and Chris runs across a couple characters who are giving way too strong an Outsider vibe and seriously do not belong in this book and it is distressing!

Plus, Chris challenges Matt to a round of Interactive Fiction or Nat Geo Show, Matt welcomes a guest expert for a new edition of Interactively Select A Beverage for Yourself, Rosebottom and Merrymustard are seriously pretty great pixie names, SOMEONE sounds like they know a lot of bank managers, and you do not want to miss out on Lenny and the cab driver.

Need to wet that whistler? Here’s today’s cocktail!

THE VELLOCET

• 2 oz Green Chartreuse
• 1 1/4 oz Pineapple Juice
• 3/4 oz Lime Juice
• 1/2 oz Falernum (Velvet)
• 2 dash Angostura Bitters
• 2 dash Peychaud’s Bitters

Fill a collins glass (or whatever you’re working with) with crushed ice, add the ingredients, and swizzle to mix and chill. Garnish with a mint sprig, and don’t set fire to this thing it’s not worth it.

Merch Time: Grab a “Love & Excitement” Shirt (Designed by Chris’ Daughter!) Profits from this Design will Go to Downtown Women’s Center in Los Angeles cuz

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Original illustrations by Ted Enik.