"Being connected to your spouse in prayer, even when things are hard, maybe especially when things are hard, is one of the best ways to know that person." ~ Pat Millea

• Why do so many couples want to pray together but never actually do it?
• What do you do when you feel too vulnerable, too proud, or too far apart to pray?
• Is there a method that works, even for couples who have never prayed out loud together?

In episode 100 of This Whole Life, Pat and Kenna Millea take on a topic that listeners have been asking for: how to actually pray together as a couple. Not in theory. Not with a polished formula. But honestly, practically, and in a way that fits real married life with kids, conflict, busy schedules, and the kind of exhaustion that makes even good intentions fall apart.

They dig into why married prayer is so uniquely powerful, including what it means that no one knows your spouse like God does, and why that matters most when things are hard between you. They unpack the difference between rote prayer and spontaneous prayer, and why both have a place in a marriage. And they walk through a specific method of praying together, taught by a priest named Father Scott Traynor, that is accessible, intimate, and surprisingly doable, even for couples who feel completely out of their depth.

Then, to mark the milestone of episode 100, they actually do it. Pat and Kenna pray the Traynor method together, on air, for real, in what may be the most vulnerable and honest moment the show has ever aired.

This episode is for every couple who has wanted to pray together but did not know where to start.

Episode 100 Show Notes (including a downloadable guide to the Traynor married prayer method)

Reflection Questions

Chapters:

• (00:40) — Welcome and episode 100 celebration
• (01:47) — States trivia game
• (14:15) — Why married prayer matters
• (22:00) — The gifts of praying together as a couple
• (33:30) — Praying before conflict: the hardest and most humbling move
• (43:50) — Getting practical: how to start
• (46:50) — The Traynor Method explained
• (52:00) — Pat and Kenna pray the Traynor Method 

Links and Resources:

• The Parish as a School of Prayer by Father Scott Traynor

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Interested in more faith-filled mental health resources? Check out the Martin Center for Integration

Music: "You're Not Alone" by Marie Miller. Used with permission.