This Whole Life

Ep72 Benefit of the Doubt: Positive Sentiment Override


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"Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things."
~ 1 Corinthians 13:7

Why do I get so hurt by others' actions?
Why is it so hard for me to let things slide?
How can I give people close to me the benefit of the doubt?

In episode 72 of This Whole Life, Kenna and Pat dive into the concept of Positive Sentiment Override, a game-changing mindset for building stronger, more joyful relationships. Kicking things off with some spirited candy rankings for the Easter season, the duo opens with laughter before turning to the more serious - but deeply practical - work of cultivating a positive lens in daily interactions with loved ones. Together, they break down Dr. John Gottman’s research on how seeing the best in others impacts not only our relationships but our own mental health. Together, they share real-life scenarios of how our internal narratives can shape the atmosphere in our homes, grounded in both faith and psychology. Whether you’re looking for ways to make your domestic church into a greater sanctuary or wanting to shake off negativity in your marriage, family, or friendships, this episode is packed with relatable stories, actionable takeaways, and faith-filled encouragement.

Episode 72 Show Notes

Chapters:

0:00: Introduction, Candy Rankings, and Highs & Hards
18:09: What is Positive Sentiment Override?
27:40: What if they're truly doing something wrong?
32:28: How do I know I'm in Negative Sentiment Override?
43:39: Practical situations
50:56: Challenge By Choice

Reflection Questions:

  1. What is one specific thing that stuck with you from this conversation?
  2. When have you enjoyed positive sentiment override with others? When have you been stuck in negative sentiment override?
  3. How do you know when you're in a negative space with a loved one? What are the signs?
  4. How do you break out of negative sentiment override and think more positively of your loved ones?
  5. Why is it so hard to give the people closest to us the benefit of the doubt? What can you do to extend that grace to them?

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Interested in more faith-filled mental health resources? Check out the Martin Center for Integration

Music: "You're Not Alone" by Marie Miller. Used with permission.

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This Whole LifeBy Pat & Kenna Millea

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