Swords. Magic. Monsters. Muscles. Boobs. Prepare to go full nerd this week (if you haven't already) as we dive headlong into a couple of sword-and-sandal epics - or is that club-and-ugg-boot? Ted Bennett drops in to check out 80's cable TV mainstay, The Beastmaster (1982), directed by Don Coscarelli. Following that, the pecs get even bigger in Ironmaster (1983), directed by Umberto Lenzi.

We really don't think these films can be spoiled, so we won't be announcing a Spoiler Territory section for either of them, even though we go into detail on the plots of both. If you can call them plots.

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Theme music: "The Cold Light of Day" by HKM. Check out HKM on #SoundCloud or Bandcamp

"It's A Mystery" by Toyah