Pope Leo XIV’s call as Supreme Pontiff goes straight to voicemail—because his brother was busy. We break down the viral sibling moment, explore a new AI that guesses your age from a selfie (sorry, Wilford Brimley), and wade into questionable waters as RFK Jr. takes his grandkids for a dip in a bacteria-infested creek. Plus: Steven Seagal's parade cameo in Russia. Yes, really.

Come for the sass, stay for the sanity—and blame the A.I. for the jokes that don’t land.

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