Family Matters

Is there a good way to talk with children about a spouse's addiction to sexually explicit material? My husband is in the process of recovering from this problem and is making good progress. Our marriage is stronger than ever, but our kids are starting to ask questions about all the meetings we've been attending. I'm not sure what to say in response.

How can I overcome my child's aversion to my girlfriend? I'm the father of a wonderful six-year-old boy. His mother divorced me when he was about three, and has since remarried. At present, she has primary custody and I have visitation rights. My son doesn't like to "share" me with anyone else and this has created a serious problem for me in my own social life. I even had to end an earlier relationship because he disliked the woman I was dating so intensely. Now I'm getting serious about another woman and am not exactly sure what I should do. Can you give me any advice?

Should I be alarmed when my six-year-old son says to me that he wishes he were dead? He made this comment today and I was so shocked I didn't know what to say to him. What should I do?

I'm a worrier, and the problem is getting worse. I've heard people talk about "anxiety disorders," but I don't know what that means. How can I tell if my worry is normal or if I have an anxiety disorder? And what should I do?

Are "pro-ana" websites helpful for those with anorexia and other eating disorders? I recently discovered that my teenage daughter, who has struggled with an eating disorder (anorexia), has been visiting one of these sites on a regular basis. When I questioned her about it, she said that it's designed to provide girls in her situation with a "community of mutual support." She says it's all very positive and encouraging and that she can't imagine how she'd get by without it. Do you know anything about this? Should I encourage her to continue her participation?

What's your opinion on teens getting involved in social networking and online chat rooms? I've read some of the teen conversations on the sites my daughter wants to visit, and they seem relatively harmless. But I'm still afraid of losing control over my child's interactions with her peers. Should I be concerned?

Should we let our 16-year-old girl spend time with an older guy? He's 25 and very involved in our church praise band. For the last year he and my daughter have had a fun brother-sister type relationship. He's very likeable and held in high esteem at our church, but for some reason my mother's intuition has kept me on the alert. It's not that I don't trust him – it would be entirely different if they were the same age. Besides, my daughter constantly assures me that they are just friends. Should I be concerned?

Will my divorce have any serious long-term effects on my kids? Our marriage has been very difficult, and I recently contacted a divorce attorney in order to discuss and explore my options. My children are still young – between 8 and 14 – and sometimes I become extremely depressed and anxious thinking about how the divorce is going to impact them. At other moments, however, I find encouragement in the thought that kids are extremely resilient and can bounce back from almost any kind of negative circumstance. Can you help me resolve this issue in my mind? Should I be concerned or not?

Would it be wrong to use part of our tithe to pay for a nursing facility for aging parents? We're finding out what the term "sandwich generation" really means. Just as our kids are entering college we're faced with providing some kind of care for my wife's mom and dad. What do you think we should do?

How can I keep my 2-year-old daughter from "beating up" on her 10-month-old brother? She kicks him, punches him, bites him, screams at him, and whacks him with toys. It all began when he started crawling. This kind of thing goes on every day, several times a day. We've done everything we can think of to stop the behavior, but so far nothing seems to work. Do you have any suggestions or advice?