On this month’s Frotcast live riff episode, we’re riffing on Cobra, the 1986 Sylvester Stallone classic that apparently began as Beverly Hills Cop and ended up as Cannon Films exploitation movie in which Sly takes out a whole gang of axe-wielding rapists. The full episode is available to our $20 Patrons. Join us? You know you want to!

This week’s Bonus Frotcast and all Bonus Frotcasts are available at Patreon.com/Frotcast. You can add our premium feed to your regular podcast app.

Keepin’ secrets, are ye?? That’s right, this week on the Frotcast we’ve reunited with our old pal Brendan to discuss a film that’s firmly in the Frotcast wheelhouse. I’m talking about The Lighthouse, starring Willem Dafoe, who Brendan once imagined had a “gnarled penis” and has long been one of his favorite impressions, behind Michael Caine and Mark Ruffalo. Brendan also had a nautical childhood in which his father taught him the NATO alphabet and forced him to sail. When he texted me about The Lighthouse I had to look up what “scrimshaw” was. How is it in Matt’s wheelhouse? Well, it turns out it’s basically an entire movie about a guy who is mad because he’s so horny. Matt hates being horny! He also loves parroting movie lines of old-timey curmudgeons and in William Dafoe’s “wickie” he has found his new Daniel Plainview.

SPOILERS! SPOILERS! SPOILERS! Yes, this episode has lots of “spoilers.” Personally I think The Lighthouse is impossible to spoil and you’ll be fine if you haven’t seen it, but I don’t want anyone whining. It would’ve been weird not to discuss “plot points,” because The Lighthouse has like three of them and they don’t really matter. In any case, listen at yer own risk, ye dogs.

We wrap things up with your voicemails and some texts from Bret. Now, time to drink exactly one beer and call 911.

This week’s Bonus Frotcast and all Bonus Frotcasts are available at Patreon.com/Frotcast. You can add our premium feed to your regular podcast app.

On this week’s bonus Frotcast, Matt and I are discussing what seems objectively to be one of the year’s best films, Parasite from Bong Joon Ho. A family of grifters (the Kims) lives in a semi-underground apartment where they steal wifi and have to chase away drunks trying to piss on their windows, until they find a rich family (the Parks) who just might be their meal ticket — provided the Kims can con their way into the Parks’ home and into their hearts. There’s only one thing standing in their way: some other poor people. It’s a comedy of a manners, it’s a class story, it’s weird as hell sometimes and super funny, we loved it. We’re discussing all the things you may have missed and reading Armond White’s review to find out why he’s one of two negative reviews on RottenTomatoes for it.

Hey Frot fam, this month for the monthly Frotcast super bonus riff episode [NOW FREE], Matt and Vince welcome Jason Webb, Matt Curry, and Jacob Sirof to the Frotquaters to riff over the cult classic Dwarf-sploitation disaster film “Tiptoes.” You’ve probably seen the trailer for tiptoes circulating around the internet. If you haven’t, check it out here!

The cast of this film is stacked: Kate Beckinsale, Matthew McConaughey, Patricia Arquette, Peter Dinklage (who inexplicably plays his entire role with a French accent), and Gary Oldman PLAYING A DWARF! Weirdly, Oldman’s dwarfface performance might be the least offensive thing about this film. It’s an absolute disaster in every sense of the word – like if an Oscarbait film were directed by Tommy Wiseau. You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, you’ll wish you’d been drowned at birth.

This week’s Bonus Frotcast and all Bonus Frotcasts are available at Patreon.com/Frotcast. You can add our premium feed to your regular podcast app!

Jojo has an imaginary friend, and get this: it’s ADOLF HITLER. That’s right, on this week’s bonus Frotcast, Matt and I are discussing Taika Waititi’s Jojo Rabbit, which is basically Wes Anderson’s Moonrise Kingdom, only with Nazis instead of boy scouts. Oh, and also the Drop Dead Hitler thing. We discuss whether Scarlett Johansson’s character is brilliant or obnoxious, whether we enjoy watching stories about little kids in love, what a Nazi comedy should look like, and pitch our ideal version of this movie, where it’s just about Sam Rockwell’s character getting wild in the dying days of the Third Reich. Please enjoy and subscribe! Let the Frotcast be your imaginary Hitler.