Send us Fan Mail

Leather can feel like a closed circle until someone hands you a map and reminds you that there’s more than one way to belong. We sit down with Graham Clark, an Australian leatherman who identifies as a daddy, to talk about his book Finding Your Leather Tribe and the real problem it solves: not just learning “how leather works,” but finding people who make your desires feel legible, welcome, and safe. 

We dig into the idea of a second coming out, first as gay, then as leather or BDSM, and why that process can still be emotional even with endless information online. Graham shares how he collected coming out stories from leathermen around the world, what he looked for, and what made some stories too painful to revisit. We also talk about why international leather culture matters, where representation is growing, and where political reality and language barriers still make visibility harder. 

Then we shift to the practical side: consent and negotiation as baseline skills, plus the nuts and bolts of building a living resource guide with bars, clubs, social groups, retailers, events, and apps. Graham explains how the website expands beyond the book and why community submissions are essential to keeping it accurate and truly global. 

To close, Ask Edge tackles a challenging question about feederism and a weight gain fetish: how to work through shame, apply risk-aware consensual kink, protect health, and cope with a society that judges bodies harshly when a fetish is visible every day. If you’ve ever wondered how community changes what you can accept about yourself, this conversation goes there. 

Subscribe for more kink and leather education, share this with a friend who’s searching for their people, and leave a review so others can find the show.

Support the show

Ask Edge! Go to https://www.speakpipe.com/LTHREDGE to leave ask a question or leave feedback. Find Edge's other content on Instagram and Twitter. Also visit his archive of educational videos, Tchick-Tchick.