Fire Bad, Tree Pretty

In this episode of Fire Bad, Tree Pretty, Amanda and Lydia discuss S03E09 of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, "The Wish." Points of interest: Faith's love of slime demons, infuriating troll logic, red is the color of Cordelia's energy, LEAVE JONATHAN ALONE, Perfect Oz being Perfect, John Lee is a trash can, literally no one wants to see the show where Xander is the main character, the logistics of Anyanka's necklace, the wishverse contains such beautiful garbage, why is Vamp Xander wearing a diamond tennis necklace?, Sunnydale's low property values, that fear is striking name into nobody's hearts, where the fuck is Jesse?, Vampire Willow is a freak, the Shackle Shack is thriving in this universe, what Buffy would be like if she got run through a Faith filter, Puppy's weird pickup lines, we support the mission but not the method, the delicious but highly impractical human juice box machine, will it blend?, blood on the knee (operation!), marshmallow jizz, #notallvengeancedemons, Team Spillow, DaviBorZ, Dead Man on Campus, the blunt void, Xampire! Whampire!, and if you take nothing else away from this episode, let it be that Ted Chervin fingered Ginger in front of EVERYONE.

In this episode of Fire Bad, Tree Pretty, Amanda and Lydia discuss S03E08, "Lovers Walk," aka How Spikey Got His Groove Back. Points of interest: straight to the heart with Spike and Joyce, acting like a potato graduated from med school, Mothers Against Dirty Dancing, a 24k gold puppy, the gift of your V card, Willow's shoe rental fetish, Sunnydale has date rape too!, Angel's vampire senses are... not great, the logistics of vampire sun damage, Spike is a Victorian orphan, free the papier-mâché nips, mini golf groupies, ball in the cup, a loose cannon rocks the beef canoe, plenty of dicks in the sea, the eternal question of why no one ever does anything in a private residence, I'm a cat hair witch, Cordelia's worst day, Granny Mattson-style, FOR ME BIG DEAL, and a lost Buffy episode about an army of eyeless rats,

In this episode of Fire Bad, Tree Pretty, Amanda and Lydia discuss S03E07 of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, "Revelations." We apologize in advance for making you remember Bubba Sparxx. Points of interest: hipster Cordelia, Buffy's secret boyfriend, motorvation, thebomb.beanie, Ms. New Booty break, an asshole for the ages, #yesalloldwhiteguys, P.S. fuck off, basic book bitches, Mrs. Bitchtown USA, sexy couples tai chi, cold turkey corner reveals an unknowable mystery, Mr. Liam Angelus NoLastName Angel, exist stage bush, the other other white glove, Professor Pierce Mynhegon, another shitty intervention, the Miss Calendar card, have you heard the good news about adultery?, the term "ex-meat," Shovel Shack: I Dig It, the unwilling swingers club, and a sexy workaround to the perfect happiness clause.

In this episode of Fire Bad, Tree Pretty, Amanda and Lydia discuss S03E06 of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, "Band Candy." Points of interest: a plague of disappearing babies, how the mayor likes to sniff things, Buffy's thirst face, Scott who?, RIP my eye, Lydia treats us to a parody of a parody song, blatant ankle frottage, remember making out?, Ms. Barton: the real mvp, Extreme Teen Giles, Kotter Korner, shirtless formal, teenagering: do not do it, TGI-came of age before social media, dad style, sex jeans, Juicers, Wawa stories, getting to first base with your grandma, groin cloths, Lydia's cousin was on Wife Swap??, baby pageants, it's all fun and games until you blow your tushie off, double-babing, weird smell corner, candy math, tampons so large they won't fit into our backpacks, and ficverses.

In this episode of Fire Bad, Tree Pretty, Amanda and Lydia discuss S03E05, "Homecoming." Points of interest: Sextown USA, button your shirt Angel, banana shoes are a deal breaker, creepy van stories, why are you like this Jossua?, the logistics of getting mayo under your nails, bunker therapy, objecting to this senior picture farce, all of Buffy's friends suck, the return of the Gorch, parsing the bases, "I don't know if I can twerk in this dress!", panda bear ASMR, the rate of cupcake inflation, Giles' dad jokes, #blessedbywaffles, vegan pause, Queen C gets it done, the mayor knows the truth about children much agony, much choice, and Mr. Trick and Candy Gorch really elevate the fashion segment.

In this episode of Fire Bad, Tree Pretty, Amanda and Lydia discuss S03E04, "Beauty and the Beasts." Points of Interest: Angel is definitely a never nude, so there's a naked teen boy locked in the book cage, parsing the Monty, Faith and Buffy - we’re here for it, graveyard party ambiance, serial killer eyes, stay salty Giles, welcome to the 90’s, where teachers smoke in their offices, therapy corner, magic pants! part 2, his pork and beans were completely out, Shackle Shack redux, don’t deny the power of cotton eye Joe, implied dick, cake donuts can fuck right off, our new commercial for fruit roll-ups, Scott should find better friends with Zip Recruiter, the ash debate, Lydia is in an abusive relationship with her cat, “I don’t like bringing horses into my sex life," state of the pod: not into pee stuff, werewolf zoomies, the gay possum, Canadian corner, and a whole lot of single entendre about putting "notes" in your "music comp book." #shackleshook #qualityshackles #getabetterwallsconce

We survived Dead Man's Party, and now it's Faith o' clock! In this episode of Fire Bad, Tree Pretty, Amanda and Lydia discuss S03E03 of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, "Faith, Hope, and Trick." Points of interest: Queer as Folk break, shaking off the hornies, Stepford Buffy, Mr. Trick and how amazing he is, we time travel back to nineteen-dickety-six for some penny candies and 99 cent gas, Commandant Tingles, Buffy is betrayed by her face holes, George Michael Dance Break, we discover Lydia's attraction to the archetype of Business Douche, LET GILES KAYAK, Buffy gets slightly Single White Slayer-ed, Scott Hope is ignorant of normal relationship timelines and also is a homewrecker, Buffy spills all the beans about Angel and we hope everyone feels like garbage monsters now, it's raining naked vampires, let it flow?, Faith's boob curtain, a vagina full of marnox root, GOOP: the uterus saver, and Lydia wonders if she's the Xander.

Season 3 is upon us! In this episode of Fire Bad, Tree Pretty, Amanda and Lydia discuss S03E01 of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, "Anne." Points of interest: our lives are terrible high school tv plotlines, debating The Rachel, Chad Todhunter, Summer in the Hamptons Barbie, Mushy and her meat love return, Lydia relives her family school-related nightmares, investigate my genitals, what can you do when a bitch is being a bitch?, Joss loves a Joan, sexy buttons, hope is a real thing (just like a penis), tea cozy corner, Barbie toilet paper covers, Oz TumWatch, several men left behind, lots of dead man’s party pre-rage, and the question that haunts us: WHAT ARE THEY MAKING?

Season two is donezo! So in this episode of Fire Bad, Tree Pretty, Amanda and Lydia take a minute before diving into season three, talk a bit about the season as a whole, and then give out some fake awards to fictional character who do not care. Please excuse the decline in audio quality in the latter half of this ep, Moloch got into our recording equipment and fucked some shit up.