Forgive Yourself

In this episode, I talk with the luminous Harper A. Bailey, whose debut memoir It Was Her poured straight into my heart. We talk about the dream that sparked her writing, the spiritual co-creation behind her pen name, and the moment she realized her story wasn’t just hers, it was meant to unlock stories in others. Harper shares how grief became both her wilderness and her teacher, and how processing isn’t about doing, but about learning to be with ourselves again. This conversation is all about reclaiming the wholeness we’ve always carried but sometimes forget. If you’ve ever felt stuck between the pain of the past and the hope of what could be, this episode is a reminder that you can return home to yourself at any time.

What You’ll Learn

• How grief can become a doorway back to yourself, not a destination you’re meant to stay in
• Why Harper chose a pen name and how it unlocked a deeper spiritual and creative voice
• The difference between doing the work and actually processing your emotions
• What it looks like to forgive the younger version of yourself and reclaim your wholeness

Download the first chapter of It Was Her: https://www.harperabailey.com/ 

Get the full book: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0FMH494DB

Follow Harper on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/harper_abailey

Resources:

Your FREE Forgive Yourself resources: https://brendareisscoaching.com/resources/

Are you struggling with a situation or a person in your life? Wondering if you are ready to work on forgiving yourself? Take our quiz to find out your emotional IQ and how this impacts your ability to forgive: https://archetype.brendareisscoaching.com/sf/357cdc60

Brenda’s Website/Links

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If you’re the one who holds it all together—for your family, your friends, your business—but quietly struggles to ask for help yourself, this episode is for you. I know that story well. For years, I prided myself on being the strong one, the fixer, the problem solver. Until my body and spirit finally broke down.

In this conversation, I’m exploring why asking for help feels unsafe for so many high-achieving women, and how that belief was formed long before adulthood. I talk about how childhood conditioning creates the “I should be able to handle it” mindset, and what happens in our nervous system when we even think about reaching out. Most importantly, I’ll share what it looks like to rewrite that story and see asking for help not as weakness, but as wisdom.

You are worthy of support. You are allowed to have needs. And when you let yourself be held, you don’t lose your strength—you reclaim your wholeness.

What You’ll Learn

• The childhood roots of our resistance to asking for help
• How “being the strong one” can lead to isolation and burnout
• Why your nervous system may interpret support as unsafe
• The hidden cost of over-functioning and self-reliance
• How to reframe asking for help as an act of intimacy and self-trust
• A reflective journaling prompt to begin softening this old belief

Resources:

Your FREE Forgive Yourself resources: https://brendareisscoaching.com/resources/

Are you struggling with a situation or a person in your life? Wondering if you are ready to work on forgiving yourself? Take our quiz to find out your emotional IQ and how this impacts your ability to forgive: https://archetype.brendareisscoaching.com/sf/357cdc60

Brenda’s Website/Links

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I’ve always believed that forgiveness is the bridge between who we’ve been and who we’re becoming, and today’s conversation is proof of that. I’m joined by Riana Malia, a board-certified neurosomatic practitioner and creator of the Clear to Create method, who helps high-achieving women break free from painful relationship patterns and finally claim the love that matches the life they’ve built.

Riana shares her powerful story of betrayal, loss, and rebuilding from the ground up, and how learning to release stored trauma at the cellular level opened the door to deep peace, purpose, and extraordinary love. We talk about why self-forgiveness is often the hardest kind, how to stop repeating old stories, and why true healing begins when you make the invisible visible.

If you’ve ever carried shame, guilt, or old pain that keeps you stuck, this episode will remind you: you don’t have to relive the past to release it, you just have to be willing to clear it.

What You’ll Learn

• Why we must clear before we can create, and how that principle changes everything
• The three layers of forgiveness: others, the ones who didn’t protect us, and ourselves
• How trauma and limiting beliefs become stored in the body
• The five core emotions to release for lasting healing (anger, sadness, fear, guilt, shame)
• How Riana’s “Clear to Create” and “Quantum Time Release” methods help you rewrite your story without reliving it
• The first step toward self-forgiveness and reclaiming your worth

Discover what’s standing between you and extraordinary love with Riana’s free 40-question diagnostic assessment: https://quiz.rianamalia.com/ 

Connect with Riana on…

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@rianamalia121

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/RianaMalia

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/rianamalia/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@rianamalia

Website: https://rianamalia.com

Brilliance Brunch Event Page: https://thebrilliancebrunch.rianamalia.com

Podcast Page: https://podcast.rianamalia.com

Resources:

Your FREE Forgive Yourself resources: https://brendareisscoaching.com/resources/

Are you struggling with a situation or a person in your life? Wondering if you are ready to work on forgiving yourself? Take our quiz to find out your emotional IQ and how this impacts your ability to forgive: https://archetype.brendareisscoaching.com/sf/357cdc60

Brenda’s Website/Links

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• Facebook
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• LinkedIn

Sometimes, it takes everything falling apart to discover what’s been broken all along. In this episode, I talk with Bryan Power, who went from a “pretty good” marriage to complete collapse before finding the tools that helped him rebuild his relationship stronger than ever.

We talk about what really causes relationships to unravel, how childhood wounds and attachment styles shape the way we love, and why forgiveness—for ourselves and each other—is often the key to true healing. Bryan shares how learning Integrated Attachment Theory transformed his marriage, and how facing his own patterns helped him find peace, clarity, and connection again.

If you’ve ever hit rock bottom in love or wondered if something broken can truly be made whole, this story will remind you: sometimes the breakdown is the breakthrough.

What You’ll Learn:

• How childhood trauma silently shapes your attachment style
• Why emotional “no contact” can be a powerful tool for healing
• The six core elements of Integrated Attachment Theory
• What true forgiveness looks like after deep hurt
• How rock bottom moments can become your greatest turning points

Take Bryan’s free attachment style quiz: https://www.myrelationshipfail.com/

Connect with Bryan on:

• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/bryanwpower/
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/myrelationshipfail/
• YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@myrelationshipfail

Resources:

Your FREE Forgive Yourself resources: https://brendareisscoaching.com/resources/

Are you struggling with a situation or a person in your life? Wondering if you are ready to work on forgiving yourself? Take our quiz to find out your emotional IQ and how this impacts your ability to forgive: https://archetype.brendareisscoaching.com/sf/357cdc60

Brenda’s Website/Links

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• Instagram
• LinkedIn

You’re confident, capable, and in control…until it comes to love.


At work, you lead with authority. At home, you walk on eggshells. You know how to speak up in the boardroom, but in relationships, your voice gets quieter. In this episode, I’m opening up about how high-achieving women like us lose our voice in love—and how we can reclaim it without losing our softness. I’ll share the five subtle signs that you’ve started to silence yourself, the deeper reasons why vulnerability feels unsafe, and the small daily practices that helped me reconnect to my truth.

You’ll hear about the power of micro-boundaries, journaling, and inner-child work, and why learning to speak up with compassion is one of the most radical acts of self-forgiveness we can make.

Resources:

Your FREE Forgive Yourself resources: https://brendareisscoaching.com/resources/

Are you struggling with a situation or a person in your life? Wondering if you are ready to work on forgiving yourself? Take our quiz to find out your emotional IQ and how this impacts your ability to forgive: https://archetype.brendareisscoaching.com/sf/357cdc60

Brenda’s Website/Links

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• Facebook
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• LinkedIn

What happens when the life you built for decades disappears in a single moment? When you go to bed a wife and wake up a stranger to your own story?

In this episode, I sit down with divorce recovery coach Beth Carroll, who knows that pain all too well. After her 25-year marriage ended without warning, Beth faced the shock, grief, and loss of identity that so many women silently carry. But through subconscious reprogramming and somatic healing, she learned that transformation doesn’t have to take years—it can begin in weeks. Together, we explore what it means to release shame, let go of self-blame, and stop replaying the past so you can finally start asking, ‘What’s next for me?’

Follow Beth on Instagram and Threads: @bethcarrollcoaching

Get 65% off of Beth's Belief Breakthrough Audit with code FORGIVE: bethcarrollcoaching.store/shop/beliefbreakthroughaudit

Resources:

Your FREE Forgive Yourself resources: https://brendareisscoaching.com/resources/

Are you struggling with a situation or a person in your life? Wondering if you are ready to work on forgiving yourself? Take our quiz to find out your emotional IQ and how this impacts your ability to forgive: https://archetype.brendareisscoaching.com/sf/357cdc60

Brenda’s Website/Links

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Today, I’m sharing something deeply personal as well as common, especially for those of us who pride ourselves on being strong, capable, and independent. We’re exploring the hidden cost of hyper independence, that survival strategy that helps us feel safe but often leaves us lonely, exhausted, and disconnected from others.

I’ll walk you through how healthy independence can tip over into hyper independence, driven by childhood wounds, betrayals, or cultural conditioning. Together, we'll look at how keeping people at arm’s length may protect us from disappointment but also shuts out intimacy and support. I’ll offer you reflective questions and simple, practical steps to help soften your emotional armor, receive support, and communicate your needs so you can keep your strength and independence while welcoming deeper connection into your life.

If you recognize these patterns in yourself or someone you love, I invite you to join me for this honest conversation. Let’s take a breath, grab a cup of tea or coffee, and commit to opening our hearts just a little bit more because you don’t have to carry it all alone, and true freedom lives in connection.

Resources:

Your FREE Forgive Yourself resources: https://brendareisscoaching.com/resources/

Are you struggling with a situation or a person in your life? Wondering if you are ready to work on forgiving yourself? Take our quiz to find out your emotional IQ and how this impacts your ability to forgive: https://archetype.brendareisscoaching.com/sf/357cdc60

Brenda’s Website/Links

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• LinkedIn

"We all have needs, right? They're not selfish. They're not wrong, and they are not a weakness. They're part of being human." This solo episode dives into something that quietly shapes our emotions, choices, and relationships - unmet needs.

Many of our adult struggles stem from basic human requirements that went unfulfilled, often dating back to childhood. If you grew up in a home where safety felt uncertain, you may carry a deeper need for security. If you were only praised for achievements, you may hunger for recognition and validation. If expressing needs was labeled selfish, you may struggle with autonomy or even resting without guilt.

I share Sarah's story - a successful woman who looked like she had it all together but came to me exhausted and resentful. As a parentified child, she learned that being loved meant serving others first. Her healing began when she named her unmet need: "I need recognition for who I am, not just what I do."

The episode explores five common unmet needs: safety and security, belonging and connection, recognition and validation, autonomy and freedom, and rest and nourishment. For each, I offer practical ways to respond with self-compassion rather than shame.

"What we name, we can nurture," I remind listeners. Unmet needs aren't flaws - they're signposts pointing toward healing. The path forward requires self-awareness, honest communication, self-compassion, and the willingness to seek support.

Your needs are valid, and meeting them with gentleness is an act of self-love.

Resources:

Your FREE Forgive Yourself resources: https://brendareisscoaching.com/resources/

Are you struggling with a situation or a person in your life? Wondering if you are ready to work on forgiving yourself? Take our quiz to find out your emotional IQ and how this impacts your ability to forgive: https://archetype.brendareisscoaching.com/sf/357cdc60

Brenda’s Website/Links

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• LinkedIn

"Your whole being is saying nope, nope, nope, not right now." Sound familiar? This solo episode dives into something we all experience - that moment when we know change would be good for us, but we find ourselves resisting it anyway.

Resistance isn't failure or brokenness. It's often a sign you're on the right track; your system just hasn't caught up yet. After noticing this pattern with clients, friends, and colleagues lately, I felt called to explore why we resist the very growth we're seeking.

I break down three core reasons resistance shows up in our lives. First, growth threatens our familiar identity - even when our old self isn't happy, it's what we know. I share the story of a client who'd been the family "fixer" for decades and felt deep unease when setting boundaries because she didn't know who she'd be without that role.

Second, change disrupts our sense of safety and control. Our survival brain screams "danger" at the unknown, even when our conscious mind wants the change. I get vulnerable about staying in unfulfilling situations because "the pain I knew felt safer than the uncertainty of change."

Third, growth forces us to face discomfort we've been avoiding - grief, anger, shame, hurt. I share how my own resistance to forgiveness work was actually protection from decades of suppressed emotions.

Each reason comes with a gentle reframe to help you move forward with self-compassion rather than self-judgment. Because resistance isn't a stop sign - it's a signal that your system is adjusting.

Resources:

Your FREE Forgive Yourself resources: https://brendareisscoaching.com/resources/

Are you struggling with a situation or a person in your life? Wondering if you are ready to work on forgiving yourself? Take our quiz to find out your emotional IQ and how this impacts your ability to forgive: https://archetype.brendareisscoaching.com/sf/357cdc60

Brenda’s Website/Links

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• Facebook
• Instagram
• LinkedIn

What happens when profound love meets devastating loss? My guest Kathryn Henry, author of "A Dime to Say I Love You," shares her transformative journey through grief after losing her wife Lisa to cancer.

After a successful corporate career leading global teams at Lululemon, Gap, and Levi Strauss, Kathryn stepped away to honor a promise to her late wife: to live fully, love deeply, and tell the truth of her experience. Her memoir is a raw, honest account of how walking through illness and death became a profound spiritual awakening.

"The profound nature of that and what ensued beyond that opened my aperture of life so much more," Kathryn reflects on Lisa's transition. Through their journey together, they discovered that love doesn't end with death - it transforms.

One of the most powerful concepts we explore is AFGO - Another F*cking Growth Opportunity - a phrase that became their healing tool for reframing life's hardest moments. "It was a healing tool for us," Kathryn shares. "It helped us to recontextualize something and shift ourselves from a perspective of victim to a perspective of owning what was happening."

We delve into "dime moments" - unexpected appearances of dimes that bring presence and connection to something beyond the visible world. These moments teach us that the present is the only place we can truly operate from.

This conversation offers profound insights on using grief as a catalyst for transformation, the power of forgiveness in healing, and how love continues to show up in the most unexpected ways.

More info and links:

• Kathryn: https://kathrynhenry.com/
• Kathryn’s Memoir - A Dime to Say I Love You
• Brenda: https://brendareisscoaching.com/

Resources:

Your FREE Forgive Yourself resources: https://brendareisscoaching.com/resources/

Are you struggling with a situation or a person in your life? Wondering if you are ready to work on forgiving yourself? Take our quiz to find out your emotional IQ and how this impacts your ability to forgive: https://archetype.brendareisscoaching.com/sf/357cdc60

Brenda’s Website/Links

• Website
• Facebook
• Instagram
• LinkedIn