Gentlemen’ s Guide to Excellence

In this episode we talk about the pool of available relationship candidates through a lens or perspective called "10-80-10" that I am borrowing from an entirely unrelated discipline - police work and law enforcement. That comparison might sounds nuts, but hear me out. I think looking at the dating and relationship problem domain through different lenses can be helpful and informative. It can help you make any needed adjustments to your attitude and approach to meeting someone special. And it can help you think about what you have observed in your own experience with dating, and what is available out there.

How can you meet a great lady without being creepy or inappropriate in the modern MeToo world?   Opportunities in life to connect with that great lady might pass you by if you are too afraid to act or let the world know you are there, or even exist.  Being afraid to speak up will likely get you nowhere.  Is there a balance that can be struck for well-intentioned guys, for guys with unrivaled integrity?  I say yes, and that is central to our approach in the Gentlemen’s Guide to Flirting book.  The book shows you how to be bold yet respectful.  It shows you how to be playful yet impeccably well-behaved throughout the process.

Today I share my views on the general topic of jealousy as it relates to dating and relationships.  I’ll start with a true story involving someone I used to know that is an example of the worst possible way events can unfold for someone consumed with jealousy.  

Time.  We are all on this planet for a finite amount of time.  You don’t want to get to the end of your time here with regrets.   You also don’t want to waste the limited time you have, nor allow others to waste it for you.  In this week’s episode, I want to talk about making effective use of time, and in some cases, being protective of your time.    

I have conducted the greatest survey of all time on the subject of flirting with and approaching women.  Never before in world history has such an impactful and societally-beneficial survey been done.  Today, I share the results with you.   

This week’s episode is a gift from me to all of humanity.  For this week’s work, people are going to erect statues of me in town squares worldwide.  They are going to name schools after me.  I might get a Nobel Prize for this breakthrough in human culture and understanding.  Why might I receive those accolades? I am going to help you read her mind.  Yes, I am going to help you read the minds of the women you want to date, are dating, or perhaps are already with. 

While I recommend men act in predictably consistent and high-quality ways in all ways and at all times based on the principles and standards from the book, you’ll do better in the dating process if you tailor your approach to each lady based on her likes and personality. That is a wide-ranging topic, but today I want to dig into one specific area you will certainly encounter, dealing with and taking care of more introverted women.

How do you work up the nerve to meet someone new? Being a gentlemen doesn’t mean you have to be one of those last place-finishing nice guys.  You can be bold.  You can be cocky.  You can be audacious even.  In this week’s episode, we looking finding the balance between being bold, and being respectful and honest in meeting new, interesting women.

The world can be a strange place.  People can behave oddly and in ways not aligned with our principles and beliefs from the book.  Not everyone will be happy with your success.  Not everyone wants to see you stack wins every day. Not everyone wants to see your continuous improvement, and your steady progress toward achieving your goals.  Not everyone wants to see how at ease you are with women, and how much fun they have with you and how women generally like your whole approach and vibe.  In this episode, we dig into the subject of high-quality ways to deal with the jealousy and haters that might arise as you progress in life.  My goal in taking you through that is maybe how I think about handling these various situations might save you trouble and aggravation in your own lives.