Get Sex-Smart

Gaslighting is a phenomenon that got its name from the classical movie "Gaslight", in which a young wife is slowly driven to doubt her sanity due to her husband's clever manipulation. Today, the phenomenon of gaslighting in relationships refers to a form of abuse and manipulation by one partner, who makes the other person in the relationship feel like they're losing their mind, their self-respect, and their sense of self. In this episode, Dr. Valeria and sex coach Sarah Martin discuss gaslighting, how to recognize it, and how to free yourself from this type of abuse. 

EPISODE NOTES:

Red flags:

• Partner is excessively jealous and attempts to limit your freedom of movement and interactions with others
• Partner treats your concerns with dismissal, disdain, mockery, or by calling you names ("dramatic, crazy")
• Partner consistently breaks and disrespects your boundaries
• Partner monitors, spies, or breaks into your social media, email, bank account etc
• You can't find things where you left them, then later find them in that same spot
• You begin to doubt your memory and your sanity 

The Reddit Story of Gaslighting 

National Coalition Against Domestic Violence

The National Domestic Violence Hotline

Need to recharge your sex life? Get Dr. Valeria's FREE 5-Day Sex Life Reboot video course here: www.sexlifereboot.com  

We often assume that older adults aren't interested in sex, or aren't having sex as much as the young people. But research shows that this is not the case; a lot of seniors are leading vibrant and rich sex lives - and are often more satisfied than when they were young. In this episode, Dr. Valeria discusses 3 reasons why sex can potentially get much better with age, and how learning this wisdom can help those of us who are younger improve our sex lives today. 

EPISODE NOTES:

Sex, Romance and Relationships: AARP Survey of Midlife and Older Adults

Need to recharge your sex life? Get Dr. Valeria's FREE 5-Day Sex Life Reboot video course here: www.sexlifereboot.com 

Bisexuality and bisexual people are often surrounded by myths, misunderstanding and judgment. In this episode, Dr. Valeria and sex coach Sarah Martin discuss the phenomenon of bisexuality and how it is defined; some of the common misconceptions and myths about bisexuality; and the challenges that bisexual people face - and how to cope with them. 

ARTICLES MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

https://bisexual.org/what-keeps-bi-men-in-the-closet/

Research article "Reasons for Non-Disclosure of Sexual Orientation Among Behaviorally Bisexual Men: Non-Disclosure as Stigma Management"

Need to recharge your sex life? Get Dr. Valeria's FREE 5-Day Sex Life Reboot video course here: www.sexlifereboot.com 

We've all been in relationships that ended abruptly and painfully. Maybe our partner started freezing us out. Or maybe he or she simply disappeared. In today's episode, Dr. Valeria and sex coach Sarah Martin discuss the four ways of ending relationships (only one of which they recommend), and how to make sure the painful endings don't happen to you. 

EPISODE NOTES:

Relationship Accountability Chart: the 4 Ways of Ending Relationships 

Esther Perel TED talk on sexual desire  - not related to today's podcast topic but an excellent talk nonetheless

Sarah Martin's website

Need to recharge your sex life? Get Dr. Valeria's FREE 5-Day Sex Life Reboot video course here: www.sexlifereboot.com 

Pornography has been a controversial topic for many years - but it also seems that it's here to stay. Is porn good or bad for our sex live? Dr. Valeria weighs in. 

EPISODE NOTES

Alexander Institute (sexual learning videos and educational porn)

Great women friendly porn (a list)

We Love Good Sex 

Need to recharge your sex life? Get Dr. Valeria's FREE 5-Day Sex Life Reboot video course here: www.sexlifereboot.com 

If you look at the media today, you will get the impression that young people are enjoying sex freely and without reservations - just google the words "hookup culture". But is this really a good reflection of reality? Two recent studies of the sexual habits of young people offer some surprising findings. Learn more about the true state of the millennial sex lives - and what can be done to make things better. 

EPISODE NOTES:

Archives of Sexual Behavior article 

National Survey of Sexual Attitudes and Lifestyles 

Need to recharge your sex life? Get Dr. Valeria's FREE 5-Day Sex Life Reboot video course here: www.sexlifereboot.com 

Do you ever wonder if there are signs that can tell you whether a man would be great in bed before you sleep with him? Are the things that may help you figure out your chances of having a great time with a guy? In this episode of the Get Sex-Smart podcast, Dr. Valeria and Sarah Martin give you 8 signs that can help you get a good read on a man's sexual potential before you get to the bedroom. 

EPISODE NOTES:

Sex Positive World Meetups 

Sarah Martin's Website

Dr. Valeria's Website

Need to recharge your sex life? Get Dr. Valeria's FREE 5-Day Sex Life Reboot video course here: www.sexlifereboot.com 

In this episode, Dr. Valeria and sex coach Sarah Martin of goodsexlifestyle.com  talk about a fascinating and controversial topic: sex robots. Are they really the future of sex? First with the very realistic sex dolls, and through today's evolution of those dolls into animated robots and beyond, into true artificial intelligence - what does this technological advancement mean for our sex lives?  Will we suffer, or will we benefit - or maybe both? Tune in and find out. 

EPISODE NOTES:

US based sex doll and sex robot manufacturers: Real Doll and True Companion

The Truth About Sex Robots (BBC article)

Is This the Dawn of the Sex Bots? (Vanity Fair)

How This Guy Fell in Love With a Sex Robot (Men's Health)

Lars & The Real Girl (film about a man and his sex doll)

Ex-Machina (film about realistic artificial intelligence and sexuality)

Find more at getsexsmart.com

Find Sarah Martin at goodsexlifestyle.com

Need to recharge your sex life? Get Dr. Valeria's FREE 5-Day Sex Life Reboot video course here: www.sexlifereboot.com

Many couples find communication challenging. Talking about sex is especially difficult for a lot of people. In this episode, Dr. Valeria lays out three essential rules that will work as a solid foundation for positive and productive sexual communication in your relationship. 

Need to recharge your sex life? Get Dr. Valeria's FREE 5-Day Sex Life Reboot video course here: www.sexlifereboot.com

In this episode, Dr. Valeria and Sarah Martin discuss the top five mistakes women often make when dating; share their own life experience and stories; and give some practical advice to women on how to increase their confidence and improve their dating experience.

EPISODE NOTES:

Dr. Valeria mentions Episode 11 of this podcast (Online Strategies That Set You Up for Success) as good supplemental listening to this episode.

Need to recharge your sex life? Get Dr. Valeria's FREE 5-Day Sex Life Reboot video course here: www.sexlifereboot.com