Getting Old Quickly

In Episode 90, Billy Donnelly stresses the importance of doing the things you like, regardless of other people's opinions/judgment. He talks about why we need to find those things that bring us joy or allow us to express ourselves or give us the opportunity to try something new, and how the unsolicited opinions of others can be detrimental to that process. He ponders why people feel the need to run down things that are different or that aren't for them rather than commending others on making bold choices or leaning into their unique tastes. However, he talks about the resulting self-doubt and shame from those situations that can derail our confidence in making such choices and prevent us from doing the things we want. He tells a pair of stories of how being on both sides of that judgment has affected him over time and the lessons he's tried to take away from each. 

In Episode 89, Billy Donnelly rings in the New Year by laying out his case against New Year's resolutions, particularly why they mostly don't stick and are set up for the bad kind of failure. He discusses how identifying aspects of your life that you want to change are a good thing, but it's all about how we go about implementing those improvements that makes all the difference. He points out that New Year's Day shouldn't be some magical pill that we think will automatically instill growth in our life, and that we can try to make changes at any point throughout the year. However, he continues, if we're not committed or ready to put in the actual work that comes with making this fixes in our lives, then it's just empty promises and hollow words, setting ourselves up for disappointment when we don't immediately start seeing results. He talks about how difficult making changes in your life can be, especially if you don't like the path you are currently on, but it does take effort and time, so give yourself grace, be patient and don't be afraid to encounter some setbacks. It's all about making progress. 

In Episode 88, Billy Donnelly bids farewell to the year that was 2021 and talks about making it through the struggles of this particular year and how it was a different sort of difficult from the horrors of 2020. He also emphatically talks about the pride he has in the growth, learning and progress he's made in a number of areas this year as well. 

In Episode 87, Billy Donnelly talks about his plans for the holidays this year, including the annual road trip to visit family for the holidays. He revisits what happened last year during the pandemic to make things less than ideal (you can hear it in full with Episode 37 - Home for the Holidays), and hopes that things go a lot smoother this time around, with less worry and concern plaguing him and far more comfort in things working out for the best. He discusses his fondness for Christmas and what it has meant to him over the years, dating back to his childhood, and he talks about what he hopes we can all find throughout this time of year for ourselves. 

In Episode 86, Billy Donnelly starts feeling a little bit better than he has in recent weeks and discusses how important finding the slightest bit of motion in his life may have helped in that. He talks about how setting minor goals for himself and getting them done led to incredible feelings of accomplishment, which in turn had him feeling good about himself. He touches upon how just finding something away from the monotony and routine that you can do can make a world of difference and have you feeling like you're moving forward out of a place of being sad or depressed or in a funk. He explains how even something so small can really help and offers up a few examples of what did the trick for him, while acknowledging that everyone needs to find their own forms of motion that resonate with them. 

In Episode 85, Billy Donnelly talks openly about some recent struggles, but really hones in on how quickly things can turn negative for him emotionally/mentally with the introduction of some unforeseen trigger. He discusses how easily it is for his mind to travel down a rabbit hole while trying to make sense of any situation, where the conclusions still almost always end up with him placing blame on himself for how things have played out. Once again, he talks about why he beats himself up and/or punishes himself for past mistakes and transgressions that he believes he must be paying a price for, and how that creates a belief system about himself that is incredibly difficult from which to escape. He explores ideas of worthiness when it comes to being able to find joy and happiness and also accepting compliments, but he digs even deeper on that front this time, as he looks at whether or not those things are "deserved" by him. He also touches upon increasing concerns of being seen as a "horrible person," whether unfounded or not. 

In Episode 84, Billy Donnelly talks about his latest road trip: hitting up a family wedding leading up to Thanksgiving. After wishing everyone a Happy Thanksgiving, he discusses his apprehension about being in a situation surrounded by lots of people, with his COVID fears still very prevalent in his mind. However, he talks about what helped him get to a certain place of comfort with his decision to ultimately attend and what the experience was like for him to see friends and family that he hadn't seen in nearly 2 years. In addition, he talks about the most meaningful memory he was able to take away from the weekend - his interactions with the groom (his cousin). He touches upon how the words spoken to him in those moments carried with them so much weight while also happening to be exactly what he needed to hear. He lays out how genuine they were, how they were nothing he expected given the circumstances, yet how much they meant to him, given the issues with validation he's struggled with over time (and how they satisfied his Words of Affirmation Love Language).

In Episode 83, Billy Donnelly hits the road again, this time for a wedding, but, in doing so, details a lot of the struggles he's faced in trying to return to "normal" and get back out there doing things in the outside world again. He talks about the worry, anxiety and fear he deals with on a daily basis as he tries to keep himself and his family safe from COVID. However, a recent tweet thread he came across that touched upon a superiority complex built around following the rules" hit him hard and pushed him to reconsider his thought process as of late. He touches upon his desire to do more things, particularly things he enjoys, and how a more realistic expectation for what could happen and gentle pushes towards events set in stone may get him back into the swing of things.

In Episode 82, Billy Donnelly decides he wants to talk about all the judgment and outrage he's been seeing exhibited by people more and more over time. He tries to examine where all of this judgment towards other people is coming from and why people as a whole refuse to acknowledge of accept any sort of nuance or the complexity of the human condition. He ponders on why some insist on perfection from others, which is an unrealistic expectation for anyone to meet. At the same time, he wonders whether or not human beings can ever truly be happy, or if there's a reason we gravitate towards finding things to be angry and outraged about endlessly. He discusses how this need to be bothered by everyone and everything is unhealthy and only fosters more of it. In addition, he talks about doing our best to identify, acknowledge and grow from these behaviors, so we can aim to grow and make some progress in our mindsets rather than doubling-down on these behaviors as somehow concrete. 

In Episode 81, Billy Donnelly has a few things he wants to get off his chest. He starts on a positive note by giving a bit of a recap on his recent road trip to Michigan and the relief it was to do something new for a change. However, he also speaks on the regret he has sometimes that the podcast isn't more uplifting and fun and can often feel like a bit of a bummer, given his mood and headspace. With that said, he transitions into talking about his current bout with depression and how so much of his days are going through the motions until he can get to the end of one and onto the next. He touches upon how his massive distrust of other people and the lack of control he has over many situations only contribute to not being able to find more safe and comfortable outlets to pour his time and energy into for potential efforts to pull himself out of any funks. He also tells a story of watching an internet pile-on occur to one of his friends and expresses how seeing people give in to their worst instincts and behaviors took him into deeper sadness due to the lack of empathy on display, with the outside world seemingly making his depression worse regularly. Finally, he ponders the purpose of mankind, and what he has concluded over the years, which doesn't help him see any potential for optimism or idealism on the horizon as a result.