It’s an ultra-rare Dudepisode — in going through the questions from our infamous live show, the Guy Friends found a few interesting Dude Queries to think about. We hope you enjoy:

The post-breakup stuff swap. How does one gingerly and very practically negotiate the delicate logistics of trading one’s mortal pelf with an ex-betrothed? What if they said they never want to see or hear from you again? Should one seek to broker an in-good-faith trade? Or should one simply move on from what the Lord taketh away, and celebrate what he giveth?

And a valuable question about everyone’s favorite topic: DICK PIX. Our male friend wonders if a dick pic has ever “worked.” We all know that sending an unsolicited picture of your penis to someone is bad, but --

...sorry — we do know that’s bad, right? The Guy Friends give some much needed perspective to those who are taking their selfies at all the wrong angles.

Something About You (Chromeo & Solange Knowles x Louis La Roche & Ad Apt) (DJ Topsider) CC BY 3.0

In this episode:

When is it time to DTR (define the relationship)? A listener asks for a reliable rubric for creating a proper context around whatever it is that you’ve been doing. Should one ask after... one month? Three months? 100 sexes? The Guy Friends can’t speak to whatever you and yours are doing, but they both agree that the DTR is on a Need To Know basis.

And what would the Guy Friends do if they felt pressured to perform a GRG (Grand Romantic Gesture)? Would they, like… do a dinner cruise thing? How much does that cost? Or like a candle-lit dinner thing? I dunno… organize a flashmob? WHATEVER. How should we navigate the treacherous terrain of bombastically-unrealistic expectations in this day and age? The Guy Friends remind us all: it’s the thought that counts.

Rita Ora - How We Do (Party) (DJ Keith Marshall's Tomorrowland Blaster) (DJ Keith Marshall) CC BY 3.0

In this episode:

A listener struggles with her casual hookup’s staunch conservatism! As a strict Republican, he’d restrict her reproductive rights if it were his call… and yet, the boning continues apace. Should she cut him off for his politics? Where does the actual sex factor into this debate? The Guy Friends… well, frankly the Guy Friends tread pretty lightly on this one — this is America, dude.

And a listener has questions about the social pressures around men and dancing. Is the Average Joe expected to trip the light fantastic with an Usher-like canniness? The Guy Friends assure you that in today’s world, even a little groove goes a long way.

Fallin' - Alicia Keys (Miroslav Losonsky Remix) (Miroslav Losonsky) CC BY 3.0

In this episode:

A friend can’t quite get past the thought of her boyfriend constantly hanging out with his cohort of female grad students… lithe, supple grad students. A certain measure of jealousy is healthy — but how much is pushing it? Can the Guy Friends help her get over these semi-rational hangups? Tune in for a doctorate-level course on relationship Zen.

And how does one elegantly transition from texting to sexting? The question held a gasp on her lips as the Guy Friends’ rough hands groped at her soft mysteries with the ferocity of a dire wolf. Her mind was a blur between their deep, hungry kisses. If the Duke were to discover us…

Redial (Blondie feat. Ludacris and Gorillaz)(@marcfaletti) CC BY 3.0

In this episode:

A friend's Friend with Benefits is dropping hints that he may want to be... actual friends? How should one respond to a completely decent proposal? Should she let this grow, or nip it in the fuckbud? The Guy Friends remind you that they have personalities, too, ya know!!!

And a listener is going out of town for a few months and wants to leave her own FWB with temporarily-parting gift. But what do the Guy Friends think of the gift of pornographic materials? Would it be uncouth for our listener to expand her lover’s spank bank? Wouldn’t a nice card, or a modest Edible Arrangement suffice?

Good Die Young (Kesha x Owl City ft. Carly Rae Jepsen x Flo Rida) (SYNTEX) CC BY 3.0

In this episode:

A friend has moved in with her significant other, but is unsure of how to best navigate having a solo "sesh" in the absence of true alone time. Is jumping right in allowable when your new roommate is sleeping right next to you? The Guy Friends remind you that you paid for the space — own it!

And a listener asks the Guy Friends whether doing the podcast for two full years as made them better lovers, communicators... people. We look back on our rich and storied history to consider how we've learned, grown, and disappointed millions in the process.

Miguel - Do You (silent murda remix) (Silent Murda) CC BY 3.0

In this episode:

We. Are LIVE. After much organizing, contract signing, Facebooking, and booze hauling, the Guy Friends answered your questions in front of a live studio audience! We smell great in person!

Is it acceptable to text someone about a newly-discovered STD?

Just how much temptation is a dude in a long-distance relationship exposed to?

Blue Balls: The Truth Behind the Myth (Horton, Aaron and Nalven, Joshua. Chicago: Guy Friends Podcast, 2014. Mixed media)

What to do with all those pesky, horny exes who suddenly appear once you're single?

And finally: searching for a sexy porn signal amid all the filthy, filthy noise.

Our deepest thanks to our friends at Early to Bed, First Floor Theatre, and The Nerdologues for so thoughtfully contributing raffle prizes!

In this episode:

The Roommate Switch. A listener asks how to best perform this ~forbidden majyk~ . After getting luke-ish warm-ish signals from a guy, but then getting sexy-awesome signals from his cohabitation relation (but then getting accidentally sleeping with the first guy), it it still possible to do the impossible? Can the Guy Friends walk her through making The Switch?!

And a listener's long-distance, super-serious boyfriend sent her some... Unmentionables. But much to her chagrin, the lingerie makes her uncomfortable! Should she have a talk with her guy about her tastes and preferences, or should she hope that it get swept under the rug? The Guy Friends try to determine when it'd be most appropriate to speak your mind.

Shakira feat. Rihanna - Cant Remember To Forget You (GBROOKE FUNKY REMIX) (Dj Lamonnz (GBROOKE)) CC BY 3.0

In this episode:

An OkCupid message. A spark! ...then a missed connection. A trip to Ireland. A message! A date after all! Drinks, playful punches, a great time, and... no kiss?! The Guy Friends examine a fantasy date with a less-than-happy ending.

And a listener wonders whether it would be an violation of the Geneva Conventions to have a serious relationship conversation without a bra? As trained U.N. inspectors, it is up to the Guy Friends to determine whether bralessness is a WMD (Weapon of More-than-Dating).

Electric Youth x Mariah Carey - Right Back Together (adam ballin') CC BY 3.0

In this episode:

A listener coming off a relationship is rethinking personality types: her ex liked to party hard while she preferred a more < href="https://31.media.tumblr.com/718e60dbc53d18e018a7aba04f76857c/tumblr_n06zceY3o61s0absto1_500.jpg">low-key environment. Should she avoid That Type in the future? The Guy Friends assure you that you don't need labels to make your own fun.

And what's the best way to compliment a dude? A friend laments that the dudes in her life can't take one without withering, or denying it, &c. &c &c. Is there a good way to shower someone with praise extra-earnestly?

GUY FRIENDS ALERT: This is your reminder of our upcoming anniversary party and live taping! If you're in the Chicagoland area on Sat. Feb. 15th, then you have no excuse. Come hang with us!

DJ Sheav- Finally Juicy (Biggie Smalls vs. Pretty Lights) (Sheav) CC BY 3.0