Here's the Tower

I saw you sitting across from me this morning on my commute. Then you stood up tall because it was your stop, but I’ll never forget the look of everything you touched after you coughed into your hand.

Your favorite one-minute audio adventure series – Here’s the Tower – is coming back for another season of 13 brand new episodes.

This season will be action-packed and some of the new episodes will be longer than a minute.

The first new episode – clocking in at a massive one minute and 32 seconds – is coming on May 20, 2020.

After that you’ll get a new episode every Wednesday for 13 weeks.

Until then, refresh your memory by blasting the previous 66 episodes now. They’re free wherever you get your podcasts and on kcomposite.com.

Here are some handy links:

Apple Podcasts

Overcast

Spotify

Google Podcasts

I am ready to admit something to myself and to my listeners. I suffer from an affliction known as IPS, or Irritable Person Syndrome.

Reported cases of IPS have grown in recent years as the world has been getting increasingly more annoying at an alarming rate.

Vaping, gamers, fake lips, videos shot in portrait orientation, tapas, walking and typing, bloggers, missing font files, DJs, sign-up-for-our-newsletter popups, people who ask if they can ask you a question.

These all take an invisible toll on us.

So while there is no cure for IPS, the condition can be treated with sleep, alcohol, or living in a remote cabin in the forest.

Don’t let Irritable Person Syndrome do to you what it did to me. Pour a drink, take a nap, and take back your life.

Nashville Masters presents The Statler Brothers Revealed.

Riding a wave of success in 1982, the Statler Brothers purchased the former Beverly Manor Elementary School in Staunton, Virginia, where most of them had attended as children.

They converted the school into offices for the group, installing a family-friendly museum and a garage for their tour buses.

This week’s episode,
it is in five-seven-five,
they call it haiku.

It’s Here’s the Tower,
and my name is Scott Ritcher,
haiku episode.

I woke up early,
at once I brewed the coffee,
I took it to go.

Dark like the winter,
it warmed me on the inside,
helping to wake me.

Near a small forest,
from my door to the bus stop,
seven-minute walk.

The book I borrowed,
I forgot it on the bus,
it is gone for good.

Only eight hours,
until drinking time tonight,
is it lunch break yet?

Finally I’m free,
and the day is dark again,
almost time for bed.

Fleeting like the wind,
one minute for each Wednesday,
it’s Here’s the Tower.

Standup comedian Chekhov Foxworthy wins over the crowd with some bits from his classic routine.

If your bathroom selfie is taken with a Nokia 3390 telephone … you might be a Russian spammer.

If you make your emails from Yahoo address … you might be a Russian spammer.

If your profile photo has watermark of Shutterstock … you might be a Russian spammer.

If you are from Jackson, Mississippi, but your name has character of backwards R … you might be a Russian spammer.

If you send me shocking news story of Hillary Clinton … you might be a Russian spammer.

If you have a Facebook account … you might be a Russian spammer.

Guest voice: Евгений в Голове as Chekhov Foxworthy

Just a little soundtrack to accompany a minute of your autumn day.

In this lesson we’ll learn some common phrases that will help you communicate when you visit Sweden. The text is printed below so you can follow along as you learn. You’ll be speaking like a local in no time at all.

Little child – Dödgrävare.

Sir – Skitstövel.

Ma’am – Kärring.

Hello, waiter – Hallo, kåtbock.

Dear sir or madam – Din jäkla manshora.

I’m happy to meet you – Jag heter fitta.

Excuse me, ma’am – Ursäkta, likjävel.

I would like to buy you a drink – Jag skulle vilja kissa på ditt ansikte.

Guest voice: Smutsorm Sommartjej

Give it up, y’all! The reclusive Bard of Cornish is in the house.