Heyy QT

Heyy QT

By Heyy QTComedyStand-Up
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Heyy QT episodes

  • Heyy QT - The Episode About Poop
    The first Heyy QT sode recorded w/ new (vice) President Kanye West and (1:55) does the White House have to be white? We discuss a possible makeover & a whole lotta poop talk. (7:52) "Mushrooms are delicious." (9:34) But boomers suck. (12:09) Tommy is a bird murderer. (13:45) Johnny Depp is suing his ex-wife over some poop in the bed? Plenty of thoughts on this including (14:32) a relatable anecdote about a mischievous friend, some very loose bowels & a dog. (16:05) What's the worst excuse you've used to get out of something shitty (literally). (19:40) Heyy QT hooks you up with the bathroom codes for two of your local Los Angeles grocery stores. (20:10) Everyone poops their pants. (24:15) Go Doyers- LA is the sports capital of the world. (28:33) Favorite thing in comedy this week. (30:07) An honest ad for a controversial sponsor.
    33 min
  • HeyyQT - Story Time!
    Heyy QT comes in HOT at the top of sode number siete with our co-hosts bragging about getting drunk in public.  (5:20) Tommy pitches Quinn the perfect covid-friendly date idea until (7:57) we learn Tom always makes the girl pay on the first date.  (10:00) Congrats to the Lakers (except Lebron) & Dodgers, so suck it everyone- LA is the sports capital of the world.  (11:23) Tom innocently shouts out the town of Lake Elsinore which (11:42) unleashes an unexpected and very wild airplane story from Quinn about a flight home he had with a horny stranger.  (16:01) Heyy QT- we can't fix stuff and (18:03) we definitely don't have enough tools.  (19:04) How the hell do air conditioners work- like actually?  (24:18) The best ad for the best steakhouse- our sponsors, Outback Steakhouse.
    26 min
  • Heyy QT - Date Ideas for Quinn
    We welcome Tommy back from somehow, yet another vacation.  (2:30) We also welcome back our executive producer, the cricket.  (3:09) Nipples are back in a big way courtesy of Cardi B, but not to worry- Heyy QT does not nipple shame.  (4:28) Quinn's worried that boobs might not be so awesome after seeing them on Instagram all day, every day.  (6:30) Are cell phones even good?  (7:28) Heyy QT discusses their life expectancies.  (8:15) Quinn is clearly scared to go on a date; but should he be? And of course the conversation (10:15) somehow delves back into grocery store talk.  (11:55) Tommy is back on the meat wagon & boy is he excited.  (14:00) Tommy tells us about his birthday plans because that's coming up in 2 months.  (15:26) We learn about Taco Tom's taco tat origin and potential plans for more.  (16:51) Mike Tyson is 53 years and still beating people up.  (18:23) A quick, fun fact about Jimi Hendrix.  (19:40) Quinn wishes he had an afro & Tom loans us a brief review of the movie 'Legally Blonde.'  (21:19) We say literally a few words about Ellen- and that's it.  (21:58) Heyy QT discusses the current state of stand up comedy and it's slow return amidst Covid.  (26:00) Stand up comedy not being back is the newest excuse Quinn is using for his weight gain.  (27:48) A heartfelt shout out to our our wonderful sponsor, Russet potatoes.
    30 min
  • Heyy QT - The Big Dick of the Law
    To begin, we pour one out (1:04) for our lady RBG (RIP) and fire off on a very enjoyable episode 5.  (2:50) Quinn implements a new societal law & (3:12) our cricket mascot makes a brief appearance.  (5:53) Quinn confidently lets the people know he of course owns a bucket & yes- he scrubs.  (7:02) Quinn again has beef with Tom over Tom's lack of beef consumption.  (9:05) Quinn faked sick to get out of work and shocker- it backfired.  (11:53)  Do microwavable foods give you cancer?  (14:08) Tommy enlightens Quinn about the world of NYC bodegas and finally teaches (16:17) Quinn about the NYC street system.  (18:52) Tommy learns that he is podcasting with a former class president while Quinn learns that he is actually podcasting with a big time loser.  (23:10) An all-time commercial for Goodyear Tires that turns into a fantasy ad for how Quinn loves the smell of gasoline.  (26:27) Tik-Tok gets banned..?  (27:20) What is Tik-Tok?  (32:51) Surprise, surprise- Quinn & Tom are Groupon guys!  (33:49) 🚨 New Segment Alert 🚨  (34:50) How does sound come out when a needle strikes a vinyl record?  (36:38) Heyy QT's first live guest via telephone Zack Djurich- platinum producer for Kanye West, friend and certified sound guy speaking on our sound questions.  (42:25) What did we learn today?
    44 min
  • Heyy QT - The Great Soda Pop Debacle
    The boys zag when everyone around them simply zigs. (1:00) A pretty loosely structured soda pop debate takes off & (1:52) the boys introduce west coasters the Royal Crown soda conglomerate. (2:59) We learn about Quinn's life long battle with (self diagnosed) Loose Wrist Syndrome. (4:55) Quinn explains a new, very dumb plan to get rich. (5:30) Are we just a weight loss podcast? (7:05) The boys get a little x-rated while discussing donuts & milkshakes. (9:04) The loosely structured soda pop debate continues with the introduction of midwestern heavyweight Green River. (11:20) Tommy disrespects cream soda. (14:10) The Heyy QT cricket returns. (15:13) Quinn opens up about his beef with the entire state of Indiana and (17:15) Tommy thinks people who live in Denver are all full of shit, but that's probably because he doesn't know how to ski. (19:08) The Heyy QT podcast grew up right near the literal murderer's row of fast food spots, which probably explains their physiques. (21:56) Quinn has some graphic demands for an authority figure of his youth. (23:12) Quinn asks Tom, "So when's the last time you had milk, ya fuckface?"
    27 min
  • Heyy QT - Football is back/Tow trucks
    The boys start out briefly touching on the return of football because the Bears are extremely back.  (4:02) It's air mattress szn at the pool lodge and Quinn & Tom are share their expert experiences dealing with them.  (6:20) Quinn is struggling to meet new, cool guys.  (9:10) Tommy went on a road trip recently and needless to say, he totally blew it.  (12:02) Tow trucks are not hard to drive so there should be more of them. (14:38) Tommy makes it known that he has a girlfriend (sick). (16:36) Tommy talks about his difficult journey being vegan/vegetarian (same thing) as opposed to Quinn's diet which sounds like it is going great. (18:41) Psych- Quinn might actually be #Gunnin4TwoHunnid. (20:42) We dive into Tommy's 7 (!!) different Instagram handles. (22:00) Tommy cannot get meat off his brain in his troubled vegan mindset. (25:31) Quinn has some parting words for all the QT's out there.
    27 min
  • Heyy QT - Weight Loss Challenge
    We stepped on the scale and (1:34) it doesn't take long for Tom to make quinn feel bad. (2:26) Quinn & Tom discuss their current weight & what each man's goal weight is. (5:50) Keto is bullshit.  (8:05) Quinn harrassed a DJ on Instagram & (8:50) we're pretty sure Tommy has never listened to rap music.  Finally, (11:29) the  penalty for losing the weight loss challenge is presented via Billy the producer. (14:55) Our heroes are dicks and we're glad they didn't have Twitter. (16:40)  Quinn & Tommy attempt to tell the listeners how they know one another, but end up going off on ageism, the top 5 people they don't like, and how Quinn can definitely beat up Spiderman. (20:20) Quinn actually succeeds in telling the story of how he and Tommy met. (21:49) Stories from the caddy yard. (25:15) How Quinn made it out to LA. (28:58) Tommy is too tall for normal life & Quinn shames him for it. (31:30) Ad read for our brand new sponsor, Leesa Mattress.
    33 min
  • Heyy QT - Pilot
    Episode 1:
    Quinn & Tommy are back..?  After a short 3 year hiatus, the guys begin by discussing their place in the LA comedy scene while also (2:44) giving you a background on how the Heyy QT Pod was birthed. (9:55) Tommy gets into his one-of-a-kind Costco Triple Play. (11:32) Quinn took the #quarantinefifteen to heart, but it's OK because fat guys are funnier than skinny guys and (14:30) nobody really knows what a fruit is.  (15:53) The boys plot out a month-long weight loss challenge vs each other. (22:44) Tommy tells us how he was the 1st ever person to be cancelled 10 years ago.  (26:23) The guys incriminate themselves speaking about fake ID's.  (29:22) Heyy QT does our first ad read and speaks glowingly about a local liquor store. (29:52) We shoutout our other sponsor Icehouse, the beer for thick Americans.
    32 min

About Heyy QT

From the publisher's feed

Two midwestern minds who are passionate about the pointless.  Comedians Quinn Garrett & Tom Callahan are out to provide an escape by attempting to understand themselves and the world around…