Hi Mom, Let's Talk!

This book by Gayle Tzemach Lemmon is an inspiring and challenging true story. We discuss oppression and privilege quite a bit. These kinds of conversations show differences in our beliefs and open space for healthy discussion. That's pretty difficult for mother-daughter sometimes. We don't get everything right here. How do you feel about each of our perspectives? What did we get wrong? Where are we at least on the right track?

Honestly we'd love to hear from you. [email protected]

Pile the sleeping bags, tent and marshmallow sticks in the car. Grab your hat and book, it’s time for a CAMPING TRIP.

Wait, who is packing what? Did we get everything? Who is making dinner? Not me!

Camping as adults looks and feels different from camping as kids. Come along as Ingrid and Vicki unpack expectations and inpirations of their family camping trip. What do rustic adventures look like in your family? How have they changed as the children become adults?

It is up to the privileged in our society to dismantle white privilege and systemic racism. So, this is one of the many ways we are taking action. Are we perfect? Absolutely not. We will fumble, you may feel uncomfortable, you may have critiques for us. This is not a how-to. It is a humble, questioning conversation. Below you'll find some resources we are finding helpful as we make steps toward dismantling systemic racism in our country and world, beginning with our own hearts and homes.

So You want to Talk about Race, by Ijeoma Oluo

Road Map for Revolutionaries, by Elisa Camahort Page, Carolyn Gerin, and Jamia Wilson

Me and White Supremacy, by Layla F Saad

The Third Option: Hope For A Racially Divided Nation, by Miles McPherson

Beyond Colorblind: Redeeming Our Ethnic Journey, By Sarah Shin

Being White: Finding Our Place In A Multiethnic World, By Paula Harris & Doug Shaupp

https://www.sceneonradio.org/ Scene on Radio Podcast, Season 2, "Seeing White"

Did I ask for that?…Do I want your opinion?…or…Do I want to spout out my opinion in the guise of “feedback.” Giving and receiving feedback is a delicate communication skill to cultivate between parents and their children who are transitioning to adults. Ingrid and Vicki talk about when and how feedback is easier to give and receive. This podcast was recorded prior to the riots that resulted from the death of George Floyd. Our next podcast addresses this topic in more detail. We left this FEEDBACK podcast in because of the value of honing this skill.

https://biglifejournal.com/pages/freebies

"I had to recognize that I had been wholehearted in my parenting. And that you are a different human being with your own brain and your own choices. (that was healthy for me, and that was hard to do)." -Vicki

This is the most raw and vulnerable we've been to date. Counseling has been instrumental in our relationship. Quite honestly, it is a big part of the reason we are close enough for this podcast to even exist. What REALLY happens when Daughter begins to differentiate from Mom - and doesn't do it kindly. We can tell you from experience...

What does “home” mean to you? What does “home” mean to me? When you say it, what significance do I place on what you say? Ingrid and Vicki discuss the difference between meaning and significance. How do words change in significance to the recipient and what meaning does the sender place on the words over time. Misunderstandings often have to do with the difference between meaning and significance. Come along for our ride considering meaning and significance.

LET'S PLAY A GAME

Are you ever just minding your own business when WHAM a smell wafts past you and you're sent right back to an old memory? Or you hear that one song and you're right back in a different time and place?

This week, Vicki and Ingrid test how well they know each other with a fun little quiz. Can they guess the other person's cherished memory with just one clue? Turns out, being Mom gives you a vast advantage.

Enjoy this little pick-me-up in the middle of our global pandemic!

Who are your roles model? Today, Ingrid and Vicki visit with their first show guests, the Kroll daughters and their mom. Kari Kroll, her sister, Dawn, and their mom, Doris, share their memories of the awkward conversations, surprises and changes in expectations along the journey to becoming adults. Dawn appropriately says, “It’s a dance, it’s a balancing act.” Hear how they learned to give preference to each other in love. Laugh at familiar memories.

We are all stuck in quarantine, all over the world. And, as hard as it is to talk about sometimes, it is also really encouraging to find all the ways that we are similar. Today, we're talking about books, cooking fails, mask fashion, and keeping our endorphins up. We are figuring this outtttttttt

Sanity Sustained by:

Pop Sugar Fitness: https://www.popsugar.com/Fitness-Video

Burnout (the book!): https://www.amazon.com/Burnout-Secret-Unlocking-Stress-Cycle/dp/198481706X

Harry Potter and the Sacred Text (the podcast): https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/harry-potter-and-the-sacred-text/id1096113994?i=1000470429634

Check out our instagram @hugandahighfive to see Vicki's failed bakes and Ingrid's gratitude pictures.

Is stress tiring?...YES

Is this podcast gonna whip up my anxiety?...NO! (I mean, I sincerely hope not; we talk openly and pretty joyfully.)

For the first time in at least 4 years we interacted with each other in a high stress situation IN PERSON. Stress in our relationship feels pretty different compared to when Ingrid was a little kid! Here's an honest conversation of how we are navigating it.

p.s. We recorded this one week into the U.S.'s Covid-19 isolation. I know we're further along now, so some of our observations about "last week" are really a few weeks old at this point.

p.p.s. We, yet again, refer to our favorite development book: https://www.drdansiegel.com/books/the_yes_brain/

Thanks Dr. Siegel and Dr. Tina Payne Bryson!