High Five: The Podcast

This would normally be the place where something clever would be said about this brand new episode of High Five: The Podcast. Jokes would be made. Laughs would be had. But for this episode, there is no joke. There is only a punchline. Donald J. Trump.

In this episode, J and Q list their Top Five fictional movie presidents that they would vote for over Trump. This should be easy, right?!?! Well, you're correct! It is! Almost anything is a better president than Trump. Hell, at the end of the episode we will literally list some of them...it's a long list. Strap in and put on your helmets as we try and right this country with a good 'ol fashioned fictional impeachment.

Fake News.

Black Mirror has taken the world by storm, and for good reason! The near-future sci-fi anthology series has been showcasing the storytelling abilities of Charlie Brooker and blowing these humble (SUPER humble) hosts' minds for nearly four years. In honor of one of the best holiday gifts we received in 2017, Q and J dive into the newest season of Black Mirror to give you the best episode-by-episode breakdown outside of being locked in the employee lounge with Robert Daly talking about "Space Fleet." Fair warning, SPOILERS for Black Mirror season 4 abound in this episode, and our Arcangel records will tell you the same, so don't listen to this if you haven't seen the newest episodes or care about twists getting spoiled for you.

It's a whole new season of High Five: The Podcast, so we also catch up on what we've seen recently (Bright, anyone?) and talk about Q's man-crush on Charlie Brooker. It's a wild ride with more twists and turns than a visit to the Black Museum. In this highly-acclaimed episode that Fox News is calling "a very stable podcast," we start Season 3.....Season 5......Season Threeve by uploading our consciousnesses into podcast form to live forever. Or maybe we don't and it's all a projection into your psyche from some futuristic device. We'll never tell.

We started off 2017 pretty strong by ranking our favorite films of 2016, and we've decided to end even stronger by actually talking about the movies of the year in the year they were released. It's been a year of political unrest, celebrity scandals, and a necessary shift in power dynamics among Hollywood...and we couldn't be more thrilled to not talk about ANY of that and just talk about the movies that we thought were the bee's knees this year. As always, these aren’t the BEST movies of 2017 (since J and Q haven’t seen them all), just our FAVORITE movies…which makes them the best, and if you don’t agree, you can still suck it.

We get so caught up talking about our (and your) favorite movies, we barely have time for commercials, but trust us, this will be the #1 ranked 2017 movie ranking discussion had all year. We have a top 10 list to prove it. According to our Moms, this is "the most embarrassing thing you've done to our family in years." Let’s get High Five: The Podcast Season 2 put away for Christmas and get to unwrapping how great Season 3....scratch that, Season 5, will be!!

Christmas horror movies are a gift from above, like manna from Hellven (yeah, that's a combo of Heaven and Hell, you get it). For as long as there have been Christmases and movies about murders on Christmases, there have been Christmas horror movies. Q and J open the gifts of which movies they watched last week, ending with a discussion about Better Watch Out, the newest Yuletide frightener. After the niceties are out of the way, they tear into why stories about the happiest time of the year and horror elements go so well together and list which classic terrifying X-Mas movies are the best. Oh, and they tell you what a "Naughty Chimney" is....it's not what you think. In this best-selling episode, which The Wall Street Journal is calling "Please stop emailing this address," you'll truly understand how black the heart of Christmas is. Put THAT in your letter to Santa.

Come on down, Fivers! It's time to take your positions behind your podium for an all-new Top 5 episode dedicated to everyone's favorite guilty pleasure past time, game shows! J & Q spend some time buying vowels and picking giant boogers to once and for all decide which 5 game shows are taking home the Big Showcase and which ones are the weakest links, goodbye. The Tribe has officially spoken and our lists will go onto the board in the form of a question, with the answer being "These game shows are better than the ones you like."

Aside from game shows, the guys talk about movies they saw this past week and which ones did or didn't live up to the hype, as well as playing a crowd-rousing Family Feud-themed game. We go for broke, big bucks, big bucks, no whammy, no whammy, STOP, as Q takes the square and the real J finally stands up. Will you move into the final round or be sent home with a parting gift of BK Knights. Either way, survey says....fun!

Merry Thanksgiving, Fivers! It's that special time each year that families get together and pretend they don't hate each other for ten hours straight. J & Q have decided to celebrate by bringing their families together and then secluding themselves in the Writer's Room to record a podcast about the Top 5 Best Thanksgiving Movies of all time! You might be surprised by how many movies are set in and around Thanksgiving (and in Q's case, which movies he considers "Thanksgiving movies"), but you won't be surprised by how much Q and J like to talk about food.

When we aren't talking about people trying to get home for Thanksgiving, we dive into what we've been watching this week and which recent DC release was a holiday disaster (hint: it rhymes with "Justice League" and is spelled the same way). We also answer listener requests just for an extra helping of greatness; so, find your place at the table and join us for a feast of cinematic proportions as we celebrate the holidays the only way we know how: by talking about movies!

It was recently announced that Universal would be disbanding their shared movie universe starring the classic Universal monsters called The Dark Universe. While this is good news, mainly because The Mummy starring Tom Cruise is a dumpster fire of inconsistencies and terrible writing, it got us thinking about all the OTHER shared movie universes out there. You know the ones: The Marvel Cinematic Universe (MCU), The DC Extended Universe (DCEU), the King Kong and Godzilla "Monsterverse" and so, so many others. In this award-winning episode, J & Q dive into what makes a shared movie universe succeed and where others (*cough* DCEU *cough*) fall short, in what The New York Times is calling "a podcast episode." It's time to watch a whole bunch of loosely-connected movies and long for the days when a film only had to worry about telling one, great story.

When it comes to Dystopian Future Films, the bar has been set pretty high. The only problem is that the bar is surrounded by flaming towers of tires and roving bandits wearing scrap metal armor. For your enjoyment, Q & J have traveled into an unlikely future where technology controls humanity, reality television praises our basest human instincts and a moronic celebrity is President. You wouldn't even believe the things we've seen in a world like that. In this exploration of the Top 5 Dystopian Future Films episode, we explore questions like "Is Idiocracy a documentary", "How talented in Harrison Ford, really?", and "Did Arnold Schwarzenegger predict the end of MasterChef?"

We also take a break from time travel to return to our when and where to see how accurately sci-fi movies from the 80s predicted the world we live in now and geek out about movies we watched this past week. All in all, our trip to the future was enlightening and we did things we aren't proud of, but it's nothing the God of biomechanics wouldn't let us into Heaven for.

Get your passports ready, because it's time to take another trip to Equestria with J, Q & A for the much-anticipated My Little Pony TV show marathon recap! As we promised in our review episode of My Little Pony: The Movie, guest co-host A has selected a collection of "good" My Little Pony TV episodes and we're going to watch them all and compare them against the movie. Foal us once, shame on you, but foal us twice, shame on A. We descend from our high horses to talk about what works and what doesn't, who the hell this show is actually for, and share our unbridled enthusiasm for Pinkie Pie (how many pony puns do you think we can fit in here). We ponder our pony presuppositions and push past prejudices to parlay positive and pessimistic perspectives on the pretty paltry program, period. Basically, we did this so you don't have to!

Welcome High Fivers, to the macabre, to the spooky, to the candy-filled Spooktoberweentacular Halloween Special Special on High Five: The Podcast. No, we didn't repeat ourselves, we created a Halloween Special episode where we dive into one of our favorite Halloween specials. Known to some as Garfield in Disguise, and to many as Garfield's Halloween Adventure, but mainly known to us as "that Garfield cartoon with the really freaky pirate ghosts." Q, A, & J sit down after watching Garfield and Odie run afoul of those nautical nightmares to discuss the nostalgia factor in cartoons like this and which parts actually scared us as kids and adults. You've already had your Halloween Treat, so it's time for a little Trick. Pillage Jon's attic and find a great costume, because it's time for some candy-candy-candy-candy-candy. Happy Spooktoberweentacular!