This week, Vanessa’s friend, Liz, writes on the “Widowed Virgin” trope, telling the story of a Jewish widow who finds sexual awakening after her husband’s death. Vanessa reflects on her own Jewish upbringing, and confronts the familial urge to marry within the religion. 

Vanessa, whose partner is non-Jewish and German, examines what it means to love someone outside of the community she was raised in. She turns to her brother, who married a wonderful Jewish woman, to discuss how important it really is to marry within your own religion. Vanessa comes to terms with her own happy ending as Liz writes an HEA for the widowed virgin of her story. 

We also get our next writing assignment from #1 New York Times best-selling author of the Bridgerton series, Julia Quinn. 

Next week: More love advice and a conversation with Lauren Sandler.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week Vanessa and Julia discuss a boyfriend’s jealousy of his girlfriend’s dream man. Can someone’s fantasy life be threatening to their relationship? 

To get answers, Vanessa talks with popular Romance advocate and critic Jen Prokop, of @JenReadsRomance on Twitter, about romance novel covers and why they should (or shouldn’t) change. We also hear a clip from Vanessa’s interview with Nichole Perkins who talks about representation in romance covers, and how they could improve. 

Send us your own romance advice questions for future episodes on our website at https://www.hotandbotheredrompod.com/advice 

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Jen wants to write a romance with her daughter as the main character. Vanessa just doesn’t understand why it has to be so...creepy.

This week on Hot & Bothered, Jen uses the trope “Fake Relationship to True Love” to explore what her daughter’s future relationship might look like as a powerful, self-actualized woman in the modern world. When it takes a creepy turn, Vanessa wonders what sort of message Jen is hoping her daughter will hear. With the help of The New York Times’ romance columnist Jamie Green, they explore the line between pretending and lying in the dating world, and how growing up under society’s gaze affects our quest for a happy ending.

We also get our next writing assignment from #1 New York Times best-selling author of the Bridgerton series, Julia Quinn. 

Next week: More love advice and a conversation with Jen Prokop, @JenReadsRomance on Twitter and cohost of the Fated Mates podcast.

This episode uses Good Bones with permission from Tupelo Press.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week, Vanessa and friend Julia Argy tackle one of the most intense Reddit questions yet: a girlfriend considering leaving her boyfriend -- a serial drunk driver. 

With the stakes high, Vanessa and Julia struggle with how to give the best advice. For advice on advice giving, Julia turns to advice columnist, podcaster, and writer, Steve Almond. Together, they discuss the patriarchal problem of male rage, and what lies between the lines of love advice questions. 

Send us your own romance advice questions for future episodes on our website at https://www.hotandbotheredrompod.com/advice

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Elizabeth and Vanessa’s parents both got married fast, and fell in love after. 

This week on Hot & Bothered, Elizabeth writes about the trope “Marriage of Convenience.” She’s taking this opportunity re-write her parents failing marriage with a happy ending. But the more Elizabeth writes, the more Vanessa wonders if Elizabeth is carrying some of the worst parts of the trope into her own life. She and Vanessa explore: how parents can inform our own idea of love, what it means to settle versus what it means to compromise, and what exactly is a happy marriage? 

We also get our next writing assignment from #1 New York Times best-selling author of the Bridgerton series, Julia Quinn. 

Next week: More love advice and a conversation with writer and columnist, Steve Almond.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week, Vanessa is joined by Katie Mingle from 99% Invisible. They explore this week’s Reddit question written by a woman in a 10 year relationship who’s experiencing feelings for another man. 

To find an answer, Vanessa and Katie call Katie’s mother, romance novelist Pam Mingle. Together, they revisit a question from earlier in this season: whether love at first sight exists. Pam, Katie and Vanessa consider the difference between romantic love and motherly love, the failures of monogamy, and whether Pam will write another romance novel.

Send us your own romance advice questions for future episodes on our website at https://www.hotandbotheredrompod.com/advice 

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Marissa Martinelli is writing a real sex scene. Vanessa is READY. 

This week on Hot & Bothered, we explore the trope “Mistaken Identity.” As Marissa tries to write a good sex scene for her mistaken characters, she and Vanessa explore the vulnerability of explicit sexuality, and wrestle with the freedom and the oppression of coded sexual language.

Vanessa turns to writer, romance-novel reader, and co-host of Thirst Aid Kit Nichole Perkins to understand what we talk about when we talk about throbbing members. 

We also get our next (steamy!) writing assignment from #1 New York Times best-selling author of the Bridgerton series, Julia Quinn.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week, Vanessa and friend Julia Argy marvel over their favorite Reddit dating advice question yet: a girlfriend curious about her boyfriend’s LOCKED DRAWER containing a secret object he refuses to divulge. 

For insight into the most mysterious relational secrets, Vanessa turns to advice columnist, entertainment reporter, and paranormal romance novel reader Meredith Goldstein. Together, they explore the boundaries of privacy, paranormal intimacy, and what we keep in drawers. 

Send us your own romance advice questions for future episodes on our website at https://www.hotandbotheredrompod.com/advice

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Vanessa and Brigid share everything with each other - their thoughts, their feelings, even their endometriosis diagnosis.

This week on Hot & Bothered, we explore the trope “Friends to Lovers.” In her writing, Brigid reckons with the way love changes in the transition from friendship to partnership. Together, Vanessa and Brigid wrestle with what they share with friends, what they share with their partners, and the intimacy born from shared pain. 

Along the way, Rev. Dr. Matthew Potts returns to shed light on how we ask for care from our partners, and we get our next writing assignment from #1 New York Times best-selling author of the Bridgerton series, Julia Quinn.

Next week: More love advice and a conversation with advice columnist and entertainment reporter Meredith Goldstein. 

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week, Vanessa and friend Julia Argy fight over the appropriate unsolicited advice to give a Redditor who just discovered his girlfriend lied to him about her virginity.

To make sense of their conflict, Vanessa turns to feminist and religious scholar Amy Hollywood. Together, they explore the religious history and origins of virginity, and the implications of how virginity is portrayed today. 

Send us your own romance advice questions for future episodes on our website at https://www.hotandbotheredrompod.com/advice

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.